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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,646
Registered: ‎03-28-2015

My daughter and her hubby share chores and it works very well for them...

 

My hubby is old fashioned and thinks the house is my job.......LOL

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎04-28-2010

Re: Home chores and men

[ Edited ]

The secret is: Never complain when the males do the housework, dishes, laundry, etc. 

Don't give them the excuse to give up and not do anything at all.

 

Same re: females.  Some spouses, no matter what gender, are a bit 'particular, too.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).
Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎04-28-2010

A sincere 'Thank you for always helping me out'  goes a long, long way. 

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).
Honored Contributor
Posts: 31,022
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

@ROMARY wrote:

A sincere 'Thank you for always helping me out'  goes a long, long way. 

 

It sounds like you are from my mother's generation, she would have been 90 and that's how she would have thought.  Today there is no such thing as "women's work" and "men's work".  That's offensive to men and women today.   It takes two to create a family and it takes two to care for that family so the idea that me "help out" and that women should be grateful that "help" is not only offensive, it's insult to the men who are as integral to keeping a home and maintaining a family as the woman is.  My girls are 30ish and my husband was a great help to me, he didn't shirk away from childcare or house work but he did it voluntarily to "help" and I always resented that attitude.  It's different with my girls and every younger family today.   It takes two incomes to live well now so all the wives/moms work outside the home...as do the men so they just naturally do what has to be done and the men don't consider it "helping our".  When they take care of the babies on the day mom is at work, they aren't "babysitting",  they are taking care of their own children and some men are better at that than the women.  So, there's no reason to "thank" Dad for making muffins for breakfast or scrubbing the bathroom before he goes to work or taking the baby to swim  class because......that's what parents do.  


 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,415
Registered: ‎04-28-2010

A sincere and heartfelt 'Thank you' is never an insult to anyone. No matter who is or isn't working outside the home.

 

It's a nice thing to say, imo.  Always worked for us in our home.

 

And I (myself) appreciate an occasional 'Thank you'.  Makes me feel good.....Heart 

 

 

 

 

 

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).
Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,522
Registered: ‎06-17-2015

@ROMARY wrote:

A sincere and heartfelt 'Thank you' is never an insult to anyone. No matter who is or isn't working outside the home.

 

It's a nice thing to say, imo.  Always worked for us in our home.

 

And I (myself) appreciate an occasional 'Thank you'.  Makes me feel good.....Heart 

 

 

 

 

 


@ROMARY  I agree.    Just because somebody says thank you doesn't mean that it is assumed that gender roles are being assigned.  Why people look for something "offensive" all the time is beyond me.

 

 

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,448
Registered: ‎05-14-2011

I agree with Chrystaltree.  The mere phrasing of the story that men are 'helping out' with household chores and child rearing proves that those old gender stereotypes are still with us.  How unbelievable in 2018.  That kind of thinking is still as offensive to me now as it was in the 1980's.