@Trinity11 wrote:
@cherry wrote:
I have a group of ladies that pray people through illness. Last night I got an email from one of our members ,asking for prayers for her daughter, who has been stricken with breast cancer
I told her we would be praying for all of them, and especially that her daughter makes a full recovery. I tried to give her some courage, by saying many cancer patients go on to live a perfectly healthy life ,using my husband as an example. I also told her I was sending her a hug.
I wonder if I chose the right words.? I wanted to give her some comfort. I like her so much. She is such a kind woman In times like this I feel so inadequate. Did I say too much or not enough?
It sounds like you said exactly what would provide comfort. Bless you, cherry, for being such a good friend.
When I had cancer, I remember most about it was that a lot of my friends kind of drifted. They wanted no part of hearing about it. I had treatment and learned a valuable lesson. Don't expect behavior that you yourself would exhibit when someone is having a rough time of it. The same friends that stood by me when I had cancer are there for me now during post recovery of a heart attack with a lot of damage and limited mobility. I treasure them as I am sure your friend treasures you.
I was going to post the exact same response. April 2011 I was diagnosed with stage IIIc cancer. I was told that my cancer was aggressive and therefore I'd need aggressive treatment. I had two friends that went over and above during this process. They provided transportation to treatment, bought DVDs for me to watch, etc. In this case, not sure how close you are to your friend's daughter but you can certainly support your friend during this process.
The absolute best thing you can do for your friend is allow her to talk, express her fears, etc. If you don't know her daughter that well, take care of your friend during her daugter's process. Call often and inquire how her daughter is coming along, cook a meal or buy a gift card to one of her favorite restaurants and send it to her in a "Thinking of You" card. Many ppl drop friends/relatives during such a diagnosis bc they claim they don't know what to say or do. It won't let me post my opinion on those kind of remarks bc "I'm so sorry to hear this" is all one has to say and works in any and every situation like this.
As for pointing out others that have made it through treatment - from personal experience I can tell you that I'd rather have positive remarks from ppl than negative but in the scheme of things, the only outcome that ever mattered to me was my own. My five years remission will be in February - 3 months away.
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