Have you ever... - Page 2

Mominohio · ‎08-08-2010

@Ms X wrote:
You were wise to avoid her if she's that nasty. You did nothing wrong. It was just a misunderstanding. What kind of adult holds something like that against someone who did something so insignificant in the scheme of things when they were just a kid? She sounds like a NUT.

I see this entirely different. This woman was wounded thinking her daughter that struggled was being mocked or laughed at when she was just trying to fit in. Any mother would be hurt by this, and not be able to feel the same about the person they thought was doing this, especially if she once like and respected the OP.

OP, even though you knew you did nothing wrong, the time to deal with it was while still in school. If it were me, and I ever had chance to run into that teacher again, I'd offer up an apology and explanation as to what exactly happened. I would just feel better to clear the air on the subject.

And thanks for posting because my take away from it, even now is that we should correct things as soon as we can, and if we can't we shouldn't beat ourselves up over something that we really didn't do wrong, even if it looks that way to others. And to realize that people see things differently. The teacher 'saw' you laughing at her daughter. Sometimes what we 'see' isn't always what really is.

INDIANA BONES · ‎01-01-2014

@AliJoi5

I am sorry this still bothers you but I truly understand you.

I am not one that can tolerate any discord between people. I normally can't sleep until it is resolved. Actually, I have taken many classes in the last year work has sent to me regarding how to become aggressive.

I am certain that with all the students Mrs. H had in her career she has forgotten this incident. I wish I could give you advice to help you feel better.

I am certain you will get some very sound advice from the nice people here.

Have a good week.

AliJoi5 · ‎03-10-2010

@chickenbutt I think we were separated at birth.

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

Well, I always make allowances for children. I have nieces and nephews who didn't acknowledge gifts for years and would never think of holding that against them. At that age (teens+), kids just aren't thinking like adults. A mature person would make allowances even if she thought you were laughing at her child and not make ridiculous assumptions about who you are as an adult. As I said, there is something wrong with HER, given your age at the time. N-U-T.

Mominohio · ‎08-08-2010

@Ms X wrote:
@AliJoi5 wrote:
Nah I don't think she was a nut. Honestly, I think she was tremendously hurt and appalled that someone would laugh at her disabled daughter. The fact that she thinks that person was me, still makes me shiver. I went to that school from grade 7-12 and still support the hockey team. I always hope to gawd I don't run into her again.

You were a kid. She was the adult. What kind of person carries such venom toward a kid all these years later? There IS something wrong with her if she is acting out this way.

I think you are totally blowing what the OP has stated, way out of proportion. She said the teacher was never the same, and cold to her. That is far from 'venom' and her being nuts.

chickenbutt · ‎03-09-2010

AliJoi5 wrote:
@chickenbutt I think we were separated at birth.

Thanks, Ali! I like to be able to relate to somebody else, especially with feelings.

Of course, it's always easy for ME to tell YOU what you should do, right?

Ms X · ‎09-13-2012

@Mominohio wrote:
@Ms X wrote:
@AliJoi5 wrote:
Nah I don't think she was a nut. Honestly, I think she was tremendously hurt and appalled that someone would laugh at her disabled daughter. The fact that she thinks that person was me, still makes me shiver. I went to that school from grade 7-12 and still support the hockey team. I always hope to gawd I don't run into her again.

You were a kid. She was the adult. What kind of person carries such venom toward a kid all these years later? There IS something wrong with her if she is acting out this way.
I think you are totally blowing what the OP has stated, way out of proportion. She said the teacher was never the same, and cold to her. That is far from 'venom' and her being nuts.

Well, venom or not for someone to be unkind to a former student because of this perceived slight is ridiculous and, yes, I think there's something WRONG WITH HER. A mature adult makes allowances for young people and doesn't take out something like this on a grown woman. Very ODD. I wouldn't want anything to do with her, frankly. I've spoken my piece. I respect others' opinions, but this is mine.

chrystaltree · ‎05-10-2010

You've been reliving the incident in your head for many years and I think you have given it an importance it doesnt deserve. It was originally a misunderstanding but you were 17, embarrassed and you didn;t have the maturity to explain and apologize. Initially, that teacher (who should NOT have had her child at her desk while she was teaching) thought you were laughing at her child, her coolness toward was to be expected. But it's possible when you encountered her years later that she was didn;t connect you with the incident, she wasn't stand offish, she was just polite to a former student she barely rememberd. You have been thinking about her for yearss, perhaps decades. She hasn't been thinking about you all those years. You need to put things in perspective, forgive yourself and move on. That teacher and her daughter have, you didn't harm them. The guilt your have been carrying around is uncalled for. Don't approach the teacher with this, it's too bizarre and a little stalkerish, in mental way. But perhaps you can make amends by making a donation to a school for the deaf or charity that works with the deaf.

stevieb · ‎03-10-2010

Not the issue at all, I know, but I also question how appropritate it was for her to bring her daughter to class on a regular basis... I'm not sure that would fly in most school settings.

In my pantry with my cupcakes...

SaRina · ‎04-17-2015

I think I would take a different tack should you ever run into her again. I would say, "Mrs. H, I always enjoyed your art class...and I was particularly impressed with your daughter's participation. She always inspired me."

I think saying something like this would set the record straight without having to apologize for a misunderstanding. Turn it into a positive.

BTW, I enjoyed reading your OP because you are a good "story teller" and you write well!