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Honored Contributor
Posts: 41,255
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school


@JobGirl wrote:

@sunshine45 wrote:

@JaneMarple wrote:

@cookinfreak you didn't have her number to call her from the restaurant and you couldn't call to say that you were waiting. If this had happened to me I would have reacted the same way since you didn't have any contact information. I hope your next planned visit is all that you hope it to be, and don't forget to call before you leave home so no waste of a trip. Woman Happy


 

 

@JaneMarple

i just want to say that i love the way you keep a more positive attitude about a situation like this. it is so much easier to be negative, but i would definitely give her another chance also, especially since @cookinfreak did not have a way to get in touch with her.


 I think if a man had done this to her there wouldn't  have been one response giving him the benefit of the doubt -new man or old flame yet for an old female friend it was given a pass as "that's how she is"

 

 

 


 

 

yes, there would have been at least ONE response. i would have given the man the benefit of the doubt. i generally dont believe in one strike and youre out in this type of  situation.

********************************************
"The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing." - Albert Einstein
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,634
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school

Friend didn't seem very apologetic, unless she was and it wasn't shared. If I did that to someone, and I can't imagine ever forgetting something like that, I would be so profusely apologetic and saying please let me make this up to you. Then I would be early for next time AND pay for her meal. But it sounds like she's always been this way. I wouldn't go along with that. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,634
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school

[ Edited ]

@sunshine45 wrote:

@JobGirl wrote:

@sunshine45 wrote:

@JaneMarple wrote:

@cookinfreak you didn't have her number to call her from the restaurant and you couldn't call to say that you were waiting. If this had happened to me I would have reacted the same way since you didn't have any contact information. I hope your next planned visit is all that you hope it to be, and don't forget to call before you leave home so no waste of a trip. Woman Happy


 

 

@JaneMarple

i just want to say that i love the way you keep a more positive attitude about a situation like this. it is so much easier to be negative, but i would definitely give her another chance also, especially since @cookinfreak did not have a way to get in touch with her.


 I think if a man had done this to her there wouldn't  have been one response giving him the benefit of the doubt -new man or old flame yet for an old female friend it was given a pass as "that's how she is"

 

 

 


 

 

yes, there would have been at least ONE response. i would have given the man the benefit of the doubt. i generally dont believe in one strike and youre out in this type of  situation.


I tend to be pretty forgiving too, @sunshine45. But it sounds like the friend has always been this way. I would probably give her another chance to make it up to me, though, and see if things are any different. 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,634
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school


@Teddie wrote:

@sunshine45 wrote:

@JobGirl wrote:

@sunshine45 wrote:

@JaneMarple wrote:

@cookinfreak you didn't have her number to call her from the restaurant and you couldn't call to say that you were waiting. If this had happened to me I would have reacted the same way since you didn't have any contact information. I hope your next planned visit is all that you hope it to be, and don't forget to call before you leave home so no waste of a trip. Woman Happy


 

 

@JaneMarple

i just want to say that i love the way you keep a more positive attitude about a situation like this. it is so much easier to be negative, but i would definitely give her another chance also, especially since @cookinfreak did not have a way to get in touch with her.


 I think if a man had done this to her there wouldn't  have been one response giving him the benefit of the doubt -new man or old flame yet for an old female friend it was given a pass as "that's how she is"

 

 

 


 

 

yes, there would have been at least ONE response. i would have given the man the benefit of the doubt. i generally dont believe in one strike and youre out in this type of  situation.


I tend to be pretty forgiving too, @sunshine45. But it sounds like the friend has always been this way. I would probably give her another chance to make it up to me, though, and see if things are any different. 


I'm adding on -- the only reason I would give her another chance is because friend contacted her. And because they used to be friends. If this is going to be her usual pattern, then I wouldn't want to get involved in that. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,580
Registered: ‎02-04-2014

Re: Had contact with friend from school

Don't feel bad ...  At 10 a.m., I had a friend who invited me and my DH over "for a movie" in her media room at 7 pm that evening  ... showed up, knocked on door, no answer.   Next day, I asked her what  happened, she said ... she forgot.    It was only 9 hrs~!     We are no longer speaking to each other.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,025
Registered: ‎05-23-2011

Re: Had contact with friend from school

I still say to give the old friend the benefit of the doubt, things happen after decades apart and many of them not for the better either.

 

I have an older sister in her early 60's who has had MS for about 25 years. She has a very bad memory, just yesterday she changed her password on her phone, didn't write it down and was locked out. As much as she tried, she couldn't remember it. I could very well see her as the OP's old acquaintance and forgetting about the lunch date. 

 

I wish that people wouldn't be so judgemental without knowing the entire story. Woman Sad

You Don't Own Me- Leslie Gore
(You don't Know) How Glad I Am- Nancy Wilson
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,994
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school


@JaneMarple wrote:

I still say to give the old friend the benefit of the doubt, things happen after decades apart and many of them not for the better either.

 

I have an older sister in her early 60's who has had MS for about 25 years. She has a very bad memory, just yesterday she changed her password on her phone, didn't write it down and was locked out. As much as she tried, she couldn't remember it. I could very well see her as the OP's old acquaintance and forgetting about the lunch date. 

 

I wish that people wouldn't be so judgemental without knowing the entire story. Woman Sad


      We don't know the entire story because the 'friend' said she forgot and that was it.   No explanation about being so sorry but she has a medical condition that sometimes causes memory lapses.  No "I was really looking forward to seeing you and let's reschedule right now.".  I heard no indication that she was truely sorry and wanted to get together ASAP.   There is no one that I haven't seen in 35 years that I would reschedule with after that sort of excuse.  

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,672
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Had contact with friend from school

 How does one forget they made a date with an old friend?   If a man stood me up, there is no doubt in my mind whatsoever that I would not make another date with him.  I would be hurt and disappointed that my old friend did that and wouldn't put myself in a position for her to it again. 

 

 

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,025
Registered: ‎05-23-2011

Re: Had contact with friend from school


@Lindsays Grandma wrote:

 How does one forget they made a date with an old friend?   If a man stood me up, there is no doubt in my mind whatsoever that I would not make another date with him.  I would be hurt and disappointed that my old friend did that and wouldn't put myself in a position for her to it again. 

 

 


@Lindsays Grandma please see my last post , this could very well be a possibility. The OP will be trying again, let's give her friend a chance. 

You Don't Own Me- Leslie Gore
(You don't Know) How Glad I Am- Nancy Wilson
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,417
Registered: ‎02-09-2016

Re: Had contact with friend from school

I did this and what a mistake. This former school mate did this to me 3 times. And then insulted me whenI called ask what happen to our lunch date , she informed me that she was called into work and had the guts to say to, what was I supposed to my boss that she didn't have time she acted like she had to get me out  of my house like I was desperate for a friend. Then out the blue she called and invited me to lunch to say she was sorry and showed up in fancy cape, heel, all all dressed for an expensive supper club, and was so not the person I thought I rekindled that she actually tried to treat me like I was a peasant. I finally ended ever seeing or going back wards. They are not the people we thought we knew, we were dumb kids. I'm just common folk and I wouldn't change a thing. I could go on but she isn't worth the bother I laugh at who she think she is..Just be ware of what I say. And don't hurt yourself, so as far as school reunions, NO THANK!!