Reply
Frequent Contributor
Posts: 81
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

I particularly like #23 below -->

{#emotions_dlg.lol}

====================


HOW TO KEEP A HEALTHY LEVEL OF INSANITY

1) At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

2) Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)

3) Insist that your e mail address is:
Xena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com
or Elvis-the-King@companyname.com.

4) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."

5) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

6) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.

7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.

8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

9) In the memo field of all your checks, write 'for special favors.'

10) Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."

11) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

12) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.

13) Don't use any punctuation

14) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

15) Ask people what animal they are.

16) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

17) Sing along at the opera.

18) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

19) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.)

20) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. For example: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the restroom.

21) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.

22) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

23) Call the psychic hotline and just say, "Guess."

24) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Slam Dunk.

25) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won!", "I Won!" "3rd time this week!!!"

26) When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!"

27) Tell your boss, "It's not the voices in my head that bother me, its the voices in your head that do."

-------

NOTE --

Everybody is welcome to add to this list additional ways to keep a healthy level of insanity. Just keep it "clean," please. {#emotions_dlg.rolleyes}