Community Chat

[KarenQVC]

@Lindsays Grandma  Would it be possible for you to live near one of your other children?  You could search for low income housing for seniors in their towns or zips.  You would pay 30% of your income for a small unit and the rest of your income would be yours to spend.  As for your sister, write her off as incurably selfish.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@KarenQVC wrote:

@Lindsays Grandma  Would it be possible for you to live near one of your other children?  You could search for low income housing for seniors in their towns or zips.  You would pay 30% of your income for a small unit and the rest of your income would be yours to spend.  As for your sister, write her off as incurably selfish.

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I have one son who is married, he just got a kidney transplant, they live in New York so that is out.  Thanks for making me laugh over the comment of my sister.  Isn't it amazing?  She was a widow when she met a widower, they got married, he was wealthy and unfortunately he passed away after twelve years.  He left the house to her plus she has her own summer home in Maine and he left her his home in Maine.  Obviously there is a trust because she travels and lives the good life.  Right now she is sending her daughter a thousand dollars a month because the company she worked for shut down.  You sure have to have quite a lot of money to be able to do that.

[maggiemuggs]

Why is her sister selfish just because she does not want to take on

her sister along with the rest of them? Over the years she has built

the life they worked for and deserves to enjoy it. I believe in helping

family but we should not be expected to take on all their problems.

I don't think it's selfish to work hard and then be able to reap the

benefits.

Okay, so after I posted my reply i saw how sis got her money. But

since she is helping her own daughter I don't see her as all that 

selfish.

[cherry]

It's selfish because she is in a postion to help without doing without herself. Standing by and watching someone struggle, through no fault of their own is cruel

[Lila Belle]

Her life, her terms, her life.

[cherry]

To whom much has been given, much will be requiredf

[KarenQVC]

@Lindsays Grandma  I guess I don't understand why NY is out.  Your costs should not be that much to move.  Leave most everything behind.  Ship a few boxes.  Pay for a one-way plane ticket.  How would your son feel about it?

[Lila Belle]

Growing up we moved 11 times. I've relocated 5 times with my husband. Our life, our journey.

[Mindy D]

Sorry, but Florida is great. The cost of a place to live is much cheaper than in NYC and the weather is fine. Cost for air conditioning is cheaper than cost for heating (electric). It's not like she would be living in the boondocks. There is no need to be upset. Living in a Winter Park in the Orlando area is fun. There is plenty to do and there are good deals on hotel rooms all year.

[GenXmuse]

The job offer could be good in the long run if it boosts her income material.   She needs to make sure she has everything in writing before going.  

So far, it just sounds like you're primarily concerned for yourself which is understandable but it isn't fair to hold your daughter back from a growth opportunity. She may be able to do this on her own.  Restaurant managers make enough to support themselves and if she can grow from there she and her daughter will have more security which could also help you. 

I think you should give her your blessing and she may change her mind.  Resisting it may make her dig her heels in. Once she figures out the associated costs and effect on Lindsay she may change her mind on her own without you being the bad guy.  

If she does go you can move to a smaller place since you won't need as much room and your expenses will be less therefore may not need her income.