Community Chat

[occasionalrain]

What about the father of those with small mouths? What about this woman's male friends/relatives having a talk with this boss?

These are grown women not helpless children, if they can't handle  inapproiate behavior how can they inspire confidence in doing their job?

[QueenDanceALot]

---

@Ms tyrion2 wrote:

Blame the victim mentality (especially if the victim is a woman) just never goes away. 

Look at some of the responses here. 

---

@Ms tyrion2

These threads always do this.

Blame the victim, blame the media, and instruct other women on how they should react..

Oh, yeah, and the "whataboutism" - some men are falsely accused so all women are suspected of being liars.

Sick of it.

[kitcat51]

I agree with your post but will add that some who have come forward have loudly scorned others accused of harrassment while keeping quiet about their own & others they knew about including sexual assaults. You have to speak up, no matter the cost to you to protect others...silence is an abusers golden ticket. Women also sexually harass & assault men, children & other women & sometimes it's not taken seriously. All of this is wide spread & all victims need our understanding & support. In my opinion anyone who lies about this happening to them needs to go to jail just like the people who sexually harass or assault. This happened to me & it's become a part of who I am.

[Tinkrbl44]

@Tinkrbl44  You go to the hospital and get treatment.  Blood tests can help id any drug you've been given and I sure would want to know what was placed in my body without my consent.  And obvious assault has rape kits specifically designed for it.  There are resources available for just that reason.

And yes I obviously know that sometimes there are no witnesses and no marks, fluids etc to nail someone as they do on tv. 

I would like to think that if a woman walks into a police station or calls 911 and reports it, odds are better that she will be believed because most people are not psychotic and have better things to do with themselves than to make false police reports. 

You also give law enforcement an opportunity to go track down the SOB right away and investigate an actual crime scene  

When you don't do that, for whatever reason, legitimate and illegimate, you tie people's hands and they are less likely to go down a road with you that they know they probably can't help you with at that point. 

Then you are really down to a he said she said and I don't think you ruin a man's life over something that he doesn't have a chance to defend himself against since the opportunity to investigate the alleged instance has been completely taken away from him.         

@Laura14

Unfortunately, you are using 2017 logic here to dispute behavior of a COMPLETELY different era.    You are also applying a "clear thinking solution" to a situation where a possibly drugged, beaten and devastated woman wouldn't have the wherewithall to act like you think she should "logically" act. 

Newsflash .....   Life isn't like that.

Back when Cosby was assaulting women, many didn't even know there was such a thing as a rape kit, and many hospitals didn't even stock them!   Not only that, but DNA testing didn't even exist then, so I'm not sure how "blood testing" would have proved anything.

Did you know about the huge rape kit backlog in this country ... untested evidence?   Did you know that many states actually throw out untested rape kits?   Did you know that when DNA testing began, it was very primitive compared to what it is in 2017, and very expensive .....  and often wouldn't have proved anything anyway?

By the way ..... just because a man is "accused" doesn't ruin his life.  That's nonsense.   There still has to be an investigation.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/untested-rape-kits-in-trash_us_56cb4e5ee4b041136f17b087

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2015/07/16/untested-rape-kits-evidence-across-usa/29902199/

[SaRina]

---

@kitcat51 wrote:

I agree with your post but will add that some who have come forward have loudly scorned others accused of harrassment while keeping quiet about their own & others they knew about including sexual assaults. You have to speak up, no matter the cost to you to protect others...silence is an abusers golden ticket. Women also sexually harass & assault men, children & other women & sometimes it's not taken seriously. All of this is wide spread & all victims need our understanding & support. In my opinion anyone who lies about this happening to them needs to go to jail just like the people who sexually harass or assault. This happened to me & it's become a part of who I am.

---

Simple, to the point, and it bears repeating....

"...silence is an abusers golden ticket."

[puttypiesmom]

One of the most disappointing things was listening to Meryl Streep calll Weinstein a God during an awards show knowing fully well of all the women who had already come out with accusations. 

Can you get PTSD from an experience like that, I think so.  Women who were trying to tough it out but always getting angry again and again when people like Streep fawn over such a creepy perverted guy. It must have made it very difficult to let it go.  19 year girls don't always know how to react and don't always know what is going on until it's over and they can sit down alone and process what just happened. I'm sure all of those women carry around substantial anger toward him. There is not enough money in the world to make such an ugly memory disappear, that's the problem.  

[QueenDanceALot]

---

@Laura14 wrote:

---

@QVCkitty1 wrote:

I think that women who don't support other women are just as bad as the men who do the harassing. Would you come forward if you felt you wouldn't be believed. ??

---

@QVCkitty1  I support a verifiable story.  Gender should have nothing to do with it which is the whole entire point.

---

@Laura14

So, a woman finds herself alone with a man, say, at a workplace, just the 2 of them and she is sexually attacked by the man.

Who is going to "verffy" this to suit you?

[AngusandBuddhasMom]

---

@fordtruck wrote:

One of the most disappointing things was listening to Meryl Streep calll Weinstein a God during an awards show knowing fully well of all the women who had already come out with accusations. 

Can you get PTSD from an experience like that, I think so.  Women who were trying to tough it out but always getting angry again and again when people like Streep fawn over such a creepy perverted guy. It must have made it very difficult to let it go.  19 year girls don't always know how to react and don't always know what is going on until it's over and they can sit down alone and process what just happened. I'm sure all of those women carry around substantial anger toward him. There is not enough money in the world to make such an ugly memory disappear, that's the problem.  

---

Yes this is all Meryl Streeps fault.

[puttypiesmom]

---

@AngusandBuddhasMom wrote:

---

@fordtruck wrote:

One of the most disappointing things was listening to Meryl Streep calll Weinstein a God during an awards show knowing fully well of all the women who had already come out with accusations. 

Can you get PTSD from an experience like that, I think so.  Women who were trying to tough it out but always getting angry again and again when people like Streep fawn over such a creepy perverted guy. It must have made it very difficult to let it go.  19 year girls don't always know how to react and don't always know what is going on until it's over and they can sit down alone and process what just happened. I'm sure all of those women carry around substantial anger toward him. There is not enough money in the world to make such an ugly memory disappear, that's the problem.  

---

Yes this is all Meryl Streeps fault.

---

I'm sure she feels very foolish now for calling him a God and if not, there is something wrong with HER.  

[NycVixen]

Because we live in a misogynistic society. Both men and women discriminate against women because we've been instilled from an early age that women are inferior to men.

It's become so common place that it's an insidious truth. I'm a graduate student who works in women's issues and I can tell you that misogyny is very ingrained in most societies around the world. Many studies have been conducted that highlight the implicit bias most people have against women and minorities.

My own mother criticized me for being fat a week after my miscarriage in January of this year and kept on whenever we spoke. When I complained about how she was mistreating me she said, "If you would've been a boy, I wouldn't have so many problems with you. We would get along". Clear example of misogyny at work. 

I've been sexually harassed at work several times but I never reported it because I didn't want to be labeled a problem employee. When I was 19, I was working at night cleaning offices and the supervisor was harassing me. Everyone knew about it.

I never said anything. He was being investigated for stealing and that's when other employees told management he was harassing me. By the time they came to talk to me about it they already knew so I also corroborated the story.

Only the men supported me. The women did not. I found out from another manager who spoke out. I'm not sure if I would report it now either. Since the climate is changing perhaps.