Re: Good grief, no will

shoekitty · ‎03-10-2010

This is just a thought. I have known 2 people who had a sizeble fortunes who did not want a trust. One was my mom. My mom was finally convinced she needed a trust, no matter what she wanted to do, it was her money...but she needed to protect it. The other person we knew never did. This is the circumstances, reasoning they presented. Both are narcissists, and money was their whole identity. Their status, intelligence, authority was attached to their bank accounts. Sad, but true. It was also control. My mom has always been difficult, because money was all she felt she had to barter with. I never accepted any money from her, because I knew what it meant to be in her debt. She was always afraid that a trust meant people could get inTo her money. She did go on her own and made a living trust when she was 79. I didn't want to go with her as she requested because I knew later it meant accusations. My Mom is 97 now, and thank God she did because I got power of attorney to take care of jer, and still do. Her money goes to take care of her!!! Caretakers at home run upward of 20,000@ mo! But she thinks she takes care of herself. Lol. A trust meant she had lost sole control of her funds. Odd, but true. Part of it was as her dementia started, and then was diagnosed as Altzheimers, she became weary of people touching her money. Same with this other person I mentioned. But this other person I mentioned never did make a will, as she wanted people to fight over it after she passed I think.

I think as amazing as Aretha was, i think she might have felt the same way. Some people see a will or trust as relinquishing total control over their amassed fortune. As they become ill, weak or diminished a tiny bit in thought process from illness. They tire, and figure things will work themselves out by themselves. Some are so unsure how how to distribute money, especially in families that are step related. There could be disconnection with children, spouses, family, etc and to sit down and make a final decision on who gets what, how money is to be alloted is too hard for them. They don't want to be disliked, they don't want to think about it....so they don't. That's my take on why someone would not do a will.

jannabelle1 · ‎09-12-2010

Whatever AF did (or didn't do), she must have had her reasons. We don't know what she did during her life for her relatives, charities or anyone else, and it really isn't our business, except to remind us that maybe we should make sure our own wills are updated if that's important to us.

pitdakota · ‎03-16-2010

@Isobel Archer wrote:
@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:
@chrystaltree How do you know she didn't leave special things to her friends or charities? She may have distributed all that before she passed.
She was worth 80 million, is what I heard.
I don't know why she wouldn't do a will - maybe she was afraid if she made a will, someone would bump her off.
Some people have odd beliefs (if it IS odd).
She had her purse with her within sight when she performed, else she wouldn't go onstage.
She took her purse onstage???? Seriously??? She was that concerned that people would steal from her? Wow.

_______________________________________________________

There was a documentary some time ago about popular black artists that came up during the same time as Aretha Franklin. It seems it was a fairly common thing for club owners and other venues to stiff black artists and not pay them after they performed. Happened to many of them back in the day, with Ray Charles and BB King being among the victims. I can't remember now, but one of the very popular black male singers advised Aretha to only perform for cash paid up front. So she did and therefore started the habit of keeping her purse with her on stage that had the money agreed upon for her performance in that purse. She didn't ever want to get stiffed for the money owed her as had happened to others.

Even in later years, she had a minimum of cash to be paid up front when she arrived to perform even if it wasn't the entire amount she was owed. That way she could not get totally stiffed for her performance. I think it was her way of making sure no one in the business was going to take advantage of her that was shaped by the culture of the years when she started performing.

I do think that in later years there were times depending on the venue she hired security people to watch her purse with the cash in it while she performed.

* Freedom has a taste the protected will never know *

Tinkrbl44 · ‎08-23-2010

@FranandZoe wrote:
She must have had her reasons.

My husband's cousin - very wealthy - died intestate and he was an attorney.

@FranandZoe

Sorry, but I just have to say it .... how stupid. SMH

bathina · ‎03-14-2010

@puttypiesmom wrote:
I would imagine her estate being worth more than 80million if not for supporting her 4 kids, grandkids and greatgrands not to mention baby mamas the sons impregnated along the way. Buying homes for her kids, cars, clothing, etc. How does a child walk in the shadow of such a great talent and become just as great? I don't think it's possible. TOD's and joint ownership of her bank accounts and homes is all most feel they need to do.

Is this true? I thought her kids were musicians. Her youngest a Christian singer. Where did you get the information on her sons impregnating baby mamas? Just curious.

debic · ‎09-02-2010

No one knows what went on behind closed doors with her kids. All that's posted is just 'stuff' gathered off the internet.

~~
*Off The Deep End~A very short trip for some!*

reiki604 · ‎03-09-2010

@bathina wrote:
@puttypiesmom wrote:
I would imagine her estate being worth more than 80million if not for supporting her 4 kids, grandkids and greatgrands not to mention baby mamas the sons impregnated along the way. Buying homes for her kids, cars, clothing, etc. How does a child walk in the shadow of such a great talent and become just as great? I don't think it's possible. TOD's and joint ownership of her bank accounts and homes is all most feel they need to do.

Is this true? I thought her kids were musicians. Her youngest a Christian singer. Where did you get the information on her sons impregnating baby mamas? Just curious.

There is no documentation of this. Just an extension of why Ms Franklin wanted to be paid in advance and watch her purse.

'I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed man'.......Unknown

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

@kivah wrote:
A friend's father died a few years ago and didn't leave a Will. He had 2 daughters in their 40s - so it would have been so easy to make a Will. He also had a prior heart attack --- and it cost my friend $80,000 in attorney fees and took a couple of years. So STUPID of her father. I really don't get it.
I had cancer 12 yrs ago and immediately had a Trust set up.

@kivah, I cannot even imagine what would have been going on in that estate or how sizeable it had to have been to incur that kind of legal fee. That's crazy. If there were 2 daughters, even without a Will that shouldn't have been that difficult.

Lipstickdiva · ‎03-10-2010

I'm also not sure how the laws are in other Courts but here in our county (and any county we've ever handled estates in), an attorney cannot charge an estate whatever he/she wants to charge.

There is a fee schedule set up by our Probate Courts. We are not allowed to take a fee greater than that schedule dictates unless there are extenuating circumstances. In those instances, the Court has to issue an order to allow extraordinary fees.

cherry · ‎03-09-2010

A news anchor that love and actually knew Aretha , living in my state, but another city, was good friends with Aretha. She spoke of Aretha's generosity to the needy. It was all done very quietly

No one knows what she gave, because it was done anonymously. What anyone does with their own money ,is their business. Do we know this claim is even true? No, we don't ,papers print what they like about the rich and famous.

She left her children better off ,than many people are able to