Community Chat

[phoenixbrd]

@SeasonedCitizen younger generation interested in travel, job, and technology.  Different set of priorities.

[Vivian]

Years ago, many women did not work outside the home. I was born after WW2, an early baby boomer. My father, a dentist, commuted into the city, over an hour each way. My mother was a homemaker, cooking, cleaning, ironing, and entertaining. We had the good dishes and cutlery, special serving pieces, beautiful table cloths and cloth napkins which my mother ironed and used for company.

I had a career. When I married, I received beautiful dishes, stemware, sterling cutlery, and beautiful table linens. I hardly ever used any of it. I was just too busy to fuss. I actually sold some of that stuff to support my graduate school education. Even now, as a retiree, I don't want to spend my time polishing the silver pieces that I still own. I appreciate the beauty and formality of the old ways and days, but I have no patience to adhere to those old customs. 

[nana59]

I remember my mother at the kitchen sink hand-washing crystal, china and sterling.....before dishwashers......what a waste of her time.....sorry, mom.....

[nana59]

What is a silly day pot luck?

[Poodlepet2]

@sunshine45, I'm in total agreement. Today's houses usually don't have formal dining as well. I think we have used our formal dining room three times in 20 years....life is more casual.

When discussing her will with my mother, I told her to leave the fine China and silver to my sister....I don't know what I would have done with it to be honest.....

From what I'm reading, it sounds like young couples are more about setting priorities. For example, the diamond market seems to be in a decline in favor of lab diamonds. Nobody is trying to dupe anybody. Couples are making decisions to use money for rings and big weddings in exchange for a down payment on a house. Smart-IMO.

POODLEPET2

[qualitygal]

While this was a wonderful thing for the O/P, I think we all can learn something about each other that is special in the way we all do things.  I kind of try to see things as different from what I experienced, but I'm willing to learn and see what others know and do.  It may be like going to another country, and needing to learn the language.  But, it can be learned.  We can experience other things or look back to the history of what was, neither is bad, just a lesson in life. 

[scatcat]

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@drizzellla wrote:

Yesterday, I was waiting for a friend in Panera Bread.  Right in front of me was a Mother and I am guessing her son. They were alredy seated before I sat down. Not once did I see her say one word to her son or even look at him. She was busy on her phone the entire time. It seemed so sad. The kid looked to be about 5 years old. And he was watching his Mom the entire time.

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This breaks my heart. Maybe it was a nanny. Either way, ugh. I was in an upscale restaurant watching a man and woman have dinner. He was looking at his phone the entire meal. No conversation, no looking up. What a class act.

We did get the full set of china, stemware, silver for our wedding. We didn't have 2 nickels to rub together but we had $700 worth of wine and water glasses and champagne flutes. So useless. 

[golding76]

I do not think SeasonedCitizen is ruing the disappearance of fine china and crystal so much as she is missing the family meal with the presence of several generations.  And yes, these meals often happened after religious services when folks were wearing their best clothing and the finest tableware and cutlery were used for dining.  

Yes, the better tableware was brought out often for these family gatherings, be they weekly or on special occasions.  It's odd, but Seasoned's email followed a recent one in which a poster was wondering what to do with her fine china, etc., because her children were not interested in it.  After I read that post, the thoughts that flashed into my mind were the family dinners we had when I was growing up.  Because my mother left her hometown and her large extended family when she married, we traveled -- and traveled often -- to attend all the special-occasion affairs.

As for our immediate family and friends, my parents often had neighbors and those belonging to our particular ethnic group in from nearby towns.  Many times my mother put out her good china and silver, but many times, too, she used her Corelle.  The food was great, and we all had a wonderful time no matter which plates we ate from.

Also, the truth is that there are few places to grow up these days where a child does not have to be monitored to protect her from someone with evil intent.  Many of my generation really did leave the house and stay out most of the day, returning only for a quick bit of lunch and then supper.  When the lights on our boulevard went on, we all dispersed to our homes for the night.

Do I love my millennial children who are not materialistic and are pretty much without prejudices -- yes!

[JobGirl]

I think many used to like the sentiment and the tradition of their mothers or grandmothers china silver etc

 others want their own new stuff at hundeds of dollars a place setting

Just look a wedding registry these days-many are still doing it they just want to pick it out

it hasn't gone away completely

[Sooner]

If you don't think mealtime, how we eat, what we eat, and when are important, read French Kids Eat Everything.  Food isn't a reward or a punisihment or a bribe.  It is what you eat every day.  They don't snack either or eat in the car.

It is a very eye-opening look at how French children are raised to approach mealtime and food.  It is amazing and makes a lot of sense.  French kids are raised to taste foods and be more accepting of new tastes and to eat what they should eat rather than baby food.

If you look at the American diet, it's all baby food now:  Cake, mac and cheese, cupcakes, and other "baby" foods.  Apparently few people eat adult food anymore.

Eating together at meals, using forks and knives off of real plates socializes kids and teaches them manners and engages them in adult conversations, making them better equipped to face life after they grow up.  I think that is very important for kids who want to rise up in the ranks of the future employed.