Stay in Touch
Get sneak previews of special offers & upcoming events delivered to your inbox.
Sign in
11-16-2020 03:39 AM - edited 11-16-2020 03:50 AM
21. Innkeeper: The room is $15 a night.
It's $5 if you make your own bed.
Guest: "I'll make my own bed."
Innkeeper: "Good; "I'll get you some nails and wood."
22. A lot of people cry when they cut an onion. T
he trick is not to get an emotional bond.
23. Q: Who cares if your guest pees in the shower
A: "The bride and all her guests, apparently."
24. Son: "Dad, when will I be old enough so I
have to to ask mom for permission?"
Dad: "Son, even I haven't grown old enough to go out without her permission."
25. A man called his child's doctor, "Hello!" My son just snatched my pen when I was writing and swallowed it. What should I do?" The doctor replied, "Until I can come over, write with another pen."
26. A Pickpocket was in court for a series of petty
crimes. The judge said, "Sir, you are hereby fined $100." The lawyer stood up and said, "Your Honor, my client
has only $75 on him at this time, but if you'd allow
him a few moments in the crowd...
27. Q: What's red and bad for your teeth?
A: A brick.
28. Student: " Should I get in trouble for something I didn't do?
Teacher: "No"
Student: "Good, because I didn't do my homework."
29. What can you give and keep at the same time?
A cold!
30: Q: Why did the painting go to jail?
A: Because it was framed.
31. Got tasered picking up my friend from the airport today. Apparently security doesn't like it when you shout
"Hi Jack."
32. Fred: "Why do elephants wear red nail polish?"
Bob: "I don't know, why?"
Fred: "To hide in cherry trees."
Bob: "But I've never seen an elephant in a cherry tree."
Fred: "See, it works."
33. Knock knock!
Whose there?
Ach
Ach who?
Bless you! Need a tissue?
34. Q: If a plane crashes on the Canada/USA border,
where would the survivors be buried?
A: You don't bury survivors.
35. Q: What starts with F and ends with U-C-K?
A: Firetruck
To Be Continued
Short Funny Jokes For Adults
11-16-2020 07:18 AM
Great Monday morning laughs. Thanks @Lindsays Grandma 🙏❤️☕️
11-16-2020 04:37 PM - edited 11-16-2020 04:38 PM
@Lindsays Grandma These corny funnies tickled my funny bone, but number 26, has me in stitches!!!🤣🤣🤣🤣
~~~All we need is LOVE💖
Get sneak previews of special offers & upcoming events delivered to your inbox.
*You're signing up to receive QVC promotional email.
Find recent orders, do a return or exchange, create a Wish List & more.
Privacy StatementGeneral Terms of Use
QVC is not responsible for the availability, content, security, policies, or practices of the above referenced third-party linked sites nor liable for statements, claims, opinions, or representations contained therein. QVC's Privacy Statement does not apply to these third-party web sites.
© 1995-2024 QVC, Inc. All rights reserved. | QVC, Q and the Q logo are registered service marks of ER Marks, Inc. 888-345-5788