Community Chat

[silkyk]

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@CalminHeart wrote:

If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck......

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I always laugh when I hear this phrase because my Mom use to say "If I walk like a Dr. talk like a Dr. and look like a Dr. will you let me operate on you?". That was my Ma!

[mstyrion 1]

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@pitdakota wrote:

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@Lila Belle wrote:

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@pitdakota wrote:

Mominohio, I am talking about the 70s and 80s too.  I had a good friend in the early 1980s that was raped on a date.  There was no way she was going to report it!  And it didn't help that we had a local case on trial getting media coverage where the defense attorney was demonizing the woman that testified against the perp that was going on at the same time that this happened to her.  My friend kept saying there was no way she was going to put herself through that.  And she didn't either.  We are not talking that this only occurred back in the 1940s/1950s....this wasn't all that uncommon during the 70s and mid 1980s either. 

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Great post. I don't understand  women being blamed for Cosby's behavior.

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Hi Lila Belle!  I know, I remember being outraged at the time and even wrote a paper in college about these situations.  It was horrendous how these women were treated during the course of a trial.  And at least in this area, it was darn hard to get a conviction for a situation in which the woman was in some type of a social setting with the male.  They were torn apart on the stand, the defense attorney went more for male jurors, and usually the jury acquitted.  At least here they did. 

I don't recall, the entire play of events that led to changes in laws but I know they finally changed the laws so that a woman's dress, etc. was not the issue of her testimony.  I also remember several movies in the 1980s that dealt with this part of our legal system at least in some part of the plot.  Hmmm....can't remember specifically, but didn't Jodie Foster play a role in a movie that dealt with this subject?  Geez....I just can't remember now.

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Great posts, ladies.

Yes, Jodie Foster was in The Accused. A very powerful movie about rape and the toll it takes on a woman to press charges. 

I find it hard for other women to question why another woman might not want to go through the torture of a rape trial--especially years ago. The woman's sexual history was put on trial and the common opinion was any woman who was't pure as a nun was "asking for it". 

We don't know the full stories of the women who may have accepted money from Cosby to keep silent. We don't even know for sure how much of this is true. At this point, his word is worth zero to me and I find the urge for some to believe him sadly reminiscent  of all those old mind-sets about women and rape

[RainCityWoman]

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@lovescats wrote:

I always wonder if Oprah knew anything.  When I was mesmerized by Oprah I was so disappointed when she picked a couple of his kids books for her book club.

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Oprah? What does she have to do with any of this? Maybe she picked his kids' books because she thought they were worthy. Why implicate her in HIS issues? 

[Tinkrbl44]

If you haven't already seen this, here's a TV Guide  article about Frank Scotti,  a former  NBC employee who tried to keep women quiet during the  Cosby show years.

http://www.tvguide.com/news/bill-cosby-svu-actress-rape-accusations-nbc-cover-up-1089631/

[Tinkrbl44]

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@RainCityWoman wrote:

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@lovescats wrote:

I always wonder if Oprah knew anything.  When I was mesmerized by Oprah I was so disappointed when she picked a couple of his kids books for her book club.

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Oprah? What does she have to do with any of this? Maybe she picked his kids' books because she thought they were worthy. Why implicate her in HIS issues? 

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Um, because Cosby's nasty  reputation was very well known to insiders ?

[RainCityWoman]

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@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

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@RainCityWoman wrote:

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@lovescats wrote:

I always wonder if Oprah knew anything.  When I was mesmerized by Oprah I was so disappointed when she picked a couple of his kids books for her book club.

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Oprah? What does she have to do with any of this? Maybe she picked his kids' books because she thought they were worthy. Why implicate her in HIS issues? 

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Um, because Cosby's nasty  reputation was very well known to insiders ?

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So you're saying you know for a fact that Oprah was aware he was a rapist? Has she even made any comments regarding him? Her show ended how long ago? I'm not an "insider," so I question why Oprah is even a factor here.

[Suziepeach]

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@Tinkrbl44 wrote:

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I heard that too. I'd love to know how Felicia Rashad feels now about all of this- she arrograntly, adamantly defended Mr. Cosby (as she calls him) on an interview a while back. 

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Yeah ,,,, she was SO indignant about them ruining  his so-called "legacy" .....  she must have gotten a lot of heat for that mistake, so I'm guessing she thinks it's better to keep her mouth SHUT ......  in my opinion.

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Oh yes, she was very indignant during that interview about them ruining his so-called "legacy"..  I mean she had her nose stuck so high in the air, like how dare anyone say anything about Mr. Cosby.  She should keep her mouth shut now.. bet she caught more than heat..  Her indignation could be felt through the tv, who do these people think they are?

[ValuSkr]

I wonder how Joseph Phillips is so sure.  Did he see the master in action or was he too a victim?

[NickNack1]

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@Mominohio wrote:

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@Lila Belle wrote:

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@pitdakota wrote:

Mominohio, I am talking about the 70s and 80s too.  I had a good friend in the early 1980s that was raped on a date.  There was no way she was going to report it!  And it didn't help that we had a local case on trial getting media coverage where the defense attorney was demonizing the woman that testified against the perp that was going on at the same time that this happened to her.  My friend kept saying there was no way she was going to put herself through that.  And she didn't either.  We are not talking that this only occurred back in the 1940s/1950s....this wasn't all that uncommon during the 70s and mid 1980s either. 

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Great post. I don't understand  women being blamed for Cosby's behavior.

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Not at all blaming the women for his behavior, as he drugged some (many?) of them. But their behavior afterward is on them. That they took money or favors to keep quiet (I'm sure that is some, but not all), or that they didn't try to report is just not in sync with the time which this occurred. Yes, even today, some women don't want to report these types of assaults, but the 'issues' are with them, and not society. People have to stand up and fight against this type of thing when it happens to them. It is more accepted and easier to do as each decade progresses, and social awarness increases. It was perhaps a little harder in those decades, but not enough for this many women to have allowed themselves to be bought off or be running scared. He was powerful, no doubt, but bigger men were being brought down with such scandals during the same time frame. I'm thinking many of them, while not choosing the position, were willing to sell out once there. 

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What makes you think they took money to be quiet?  I agree that the woman whose record was just unsealed did, but I haven't heard this about any of the others.  I saw an interview that Anderson Cooper did with one of the women.  She was in charge of the Playboy bunnies at the mansion.  She said that the next morning she was planning on reporting the incident and told her boss.  He told her that no one would believe her and she should keep quiet.  I'm sure that's how they all felt.

[NoelSeven]

WHY, WHY, WHY are there always people who want to criticize women who are the victims of rape or other assault?  Even how they behave after? 

Have you never read that rape is a traumatic event and women suffer for years after?  Many gain tremendous amounts of weight because of the assault.  We don't expect them to put on their clothes and walk out as if they were not suffering.

Honest to God, I do not understand the lack of compassion and the eagerness to somehow blame the victim.  And don't for a minute think you would handle it any differently.  We are not all alike, not every rape is alike.