Community Chat

[Oznell]

Here's an interesting discussion by University of Toronto professor and private clinician Jordan Peterson, about sort of stretching your usual default comfort zones.   He sees it as a way of combatting what he calls "high functioning depression".  But you could call it overcoming "personal malaise".

He's always talking abouts default personality modes.  For example, there are personalities that are highly "agreeable".  He says that these tendencies to be agreeable and overly flexible, could be counter-acted by the person practising "standing up" for themselves in some instances, and being more of a hardball negotiator.

When he works with female clients who want to get ahead in their careers, the "agreeabliity" factor is one that he encounters a lot, and he helps women to counter that by getting more of their needs met.

I like his suggestion for people who are the opposite, who tend to be self involved and more hard-nosed and self-protective.  "Practise doing nice things for other people".

Sounds so self-evident, doesn't it?   But he always has tons of hard research data to back up what he says.  Not everyone would relate to this approach (and maybe it's of no interest to anyone here), but I find this mini-lecture thought-provoking and fun to listen to...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYehmC-zwrQ

[YorkieonmyPillow]

Sounds interesting.

I think about this sort of thing a lot.....

[StylishLady]

He is one smart cookie. You should catch his assessment of how boys should be raised. It included a wise critique of the recent school shooter and what went wrong. 

[Oznell]

Yes, very brilliant guy, @StylishLady, with a talent for presenting big ideas in a very accessible way.

Am I remembering correctly that you also may have some Canadian background?  Listening to him reminds me soothingly of all the Canadian accents of my youth.  Love to hear him say "particuLAIRly" and other Canadianisms! 

[StylishLady]

Yes. I am a former Canadian citizen. Strangely enough my own sister complains that I talk like a Yank. I guess living in the US for 55 years and becoming a citizen in 2004 has affected me.

[Oznell]

@StylishLady, I have dual citizenship since birth, have always sort of straddled two worlds, deep love for both countries.  My sister has said the same of me, as yours does of you.  But when I'm very relaxed, or visiting in Ontario, I can easily slip back into saying "aboot" or "abote" with the best of them! 

[Teddie]

Jordan Peterson has recently come on to my radar. I’ve heard him talk several times now and I’m fascinated with what he has to say and how he says it. 

[Oznell]

Exactly, @Teddie.  I think he is almost uniquely gifted in his ability to reach and help many with his insights and common sense approach.

[GingerPeach]

I like the idea of "being a bigger bag of tricks."  I like his phrasing.

Thanks, @Oznell

[Oznell]

Me too, @GingerPeach.   One of the gifts of a talented and effective therapist (or any communicator, for that matter)  seems to be to "frame" things in a way that immediately strikes the listener and makes sense, like the positive way he framed the "expanding your bag of tricks" phenomenon.   I was struck just the same way as you.