Community Chat

[reiki604]

On 1/1/2014 Kathleen said:

In our case, attorney's fees were deducted first - and the remainder equally distributed.

That's what I understand. All outstanding debts are paid from the estate and whatever remains is divided between the heirs. Unless there is proof of the jewelry, like an insurance policy or something, I think you're out of luck.

[Anniecamp]

The executor is required to pay all bills, including legal fees, before any type of distribution of funds from the estate. Only then can it be closed out.

If you, or any of the other siblings want to go to court regarding the rental income, and the documentation of it, that would be your choice. As long as you don't let it sound like too much infighting, etc., the judge may demand official accounting of what has financially gone on with that estate. It's illegal to do what your bil/s are doing.

As for the jewelry, unless you have documentation that it exists, that likely can't be resolved.

Hope this is over for you soon. I've read your posts before, and know it's been going on for a long time.

[Qwackertoo]

Very sad situation for the entire family. What a shameful way the brothers are acting in NOT honoring the memory of their father by fighting over his money & assets. They should be bending over backwards to try and be as fair as humanly possible to/with each other.

[mgm2]

On 1/1/2014 Kathleen said:

In our case, attorney's fees were deducted first - and the remainder equally distributed.

The same in our case but this family squabble has been going on for YEARS, no one trusts anyone , including the Executors. The only way these brothers will get along is each one of them pays their share of all fees and receives equally in the distribution.

[glb613]

On 1/1/2014 Kathleen said:

In our case, attorney's fees were deducted first - and the remainder equally distributed.

Same here. I was in charge of both my parents' estates. Unlike the OP's BIL, I paid all of the bills then split everything equally. The continued fighting is only going to spend what little there is left. Greed is one of the seven deadly sins for a reason.

[Jessa9]

When my mom died my oldest sister went to the house and took all my mom's jewelry...my dad was still alive. Three years later my dad died and she had all the locks in the house changed so my other brothers and sisters couldn't get in. There was nothing we could do ...my oldest brother and her were the executors of the will. There were a lot of hurt feelings . I forgave her but you never forget things like that.

[------]

On 1/2/2014 glb613 said:

On 1/1/2014 Kathleen said:

In our case, attorney's fees were deducted first - and the remainder equally distributed.

Same here. I was in charge of both my parents' estates. Unlike the OP's BIL, I paid all of the bills then split everything equally. Unless the estate is large, fighting what's he's done only spends what little you're are going to get. Greed is one of the seven deadly sins for a reason.

And the only person benefiting is the attorney.

I hope you get this sorted out hyacinth. But I agree with Sushismom. It may be best to walk away.

[lenapecci]

My father passed away in November. I am the executor, we have an estate attorney. What I guess I do not understand is there no estate attorney for your father in law. Why do some of the brothers have their own attorneys?

My fathers will was my sister and I split all 50/50. The lawyer is there to make sure this happens.

From what I have seen happening in my situation is that death brings out the worst in people. My sister wants to keep nothing, she is of the mindset to sell everything. I on the other hand am having a hard time with that. I want memories of my parents.

We have had fights over certain items. It breaks my heart to see her behave this way. I would rather have my mom and dad here.

I hope it all will end for you soon, it is so stressful, and tears families apart.

[violann]

An absolute unmitigated tragedy. No solutions. You poor husband has obviously suffered the most. DH and I are "lonely onlies" but have often shared the thought that being an only child can be harder, but in some ways MUCH easier. Just hoping that everything will soon at least be over for you and your family.

[Financialgrl]

I hate hearing this stuff particularly since I'm presently executor of my father's estate. My father was very upfront about what was in his will. Dementia set in about 8 years ago so we sold the house while he was alive and distributed any possessions at that time before he came to live with me. All monies from his home sale, future pension checks were all deposited into accounts with POD beneficiary instructions. Our intent was that should his care reach the point beyond our capabilities his money would be used for assisted living/nursing home care. His will stated, four children each 25%, clean and simple.

Dad died one year ago, I am the executor. I was in budget, sister is an accountant and niece is a CPA so any shenanigans or game playing couldn't happen, geez they'd have killed me. But I'm wondering, my state's instructions require inventory of his assets be reported to the courts within 4 months. After the one year mark (not later than 14 months) I have to prepare an accounting of dad's assets (using inventory figures) and listing all the expenses paid out and the balance at that time and that is due to the courts. That's either the final accounting or I indicate if more time is required. Because they are heirs, any of my sibs is entitled to a copy of the will, a copy of the inventory and a copy of the final accounting to the court but it has to be requested in writing. Have you done so?

Plain and simple, I hate greedy people. In my own case I'm retired, dad lived about 20 miles from me making all the executor duties much easier so I'm waiving my right to the executor fee. If other states were involved and a lot of traveling, it might be different but I found the duties not hard as much as just pretty darn time consuming, time I happened to have luckily had.