Community Chat

[kingtut]

As I have written before I have a 15year old toy poodle whom I have owned since he was a little puppy -- even knew his dog mother -- got him from a friend who died a couple of years later.

About a year ago he started acting very differently -- sleeps all the time and doesn't want to cuddle -- I considered euthenizing him at that time but the vet said he was not uncomfortable and he still runs around

He was never completely dependable in the house but I had a 7 room house with no carpet and was younger then -- he only had accidents occasionally.

For about the last year or so, he is becoming more and more incontinent --he can no longer sleep in bed with me -- until then he never had an accident in the bed, but that all changed. Now he wears diapers most of the time for #1 but still manages to relieve himself sometimes without even getting the diaper wet. He also leaves doggie stuff all over the house == have to clean it up 5 or more times a day -- afraid to get up at night and step in it.

He also is a barker so I can't just crate him or put him in one room at night-- I have already been warned about the constant barking -- during the day I have to keep the shade closed on my living room window or he can see out and barks constantly when he sees something of interest. And I am tired of the dark.

I feel very guilty about this but sometimes I consider having him put to sleep 00 it would break my heart but it so hard for me to live this way. Am I a terrible person if I do this for my benefit even if he is well enough to live a while longer - have been told it could be several more years -- I don't think I can survive that long with the problem.

I am ashamed to say some nights I pray he will not be alive when I wake up .