Community Chat

[oceanbreezy]

Solitude is my comfort zone. I always find ways to keep busy.   Being married or in a longterm committed relationship began to  suffocate me.  The men in my life demanded too much of my attention. The anticipation of going to a planned event or party where there are a lot of people takes me on an emotional rollercoaster and sometimes would get panic attacks. I don't my socializing with one or two people.

[RainCityWoman]

I was an only child and being comfortable with myself and my solitude was a way of life for me. I am a very social person, but I HAVE to have my alone times to feel normal. 

[LucyGoose]

I'd rather be alone.

[Hayfield]

Most people think I'm very social and I am but I need and enjoy my alone time.  I need to recharge my battery, especially when I'm around people I'm not that fond of, like at work, you have to get along with everyone.  In my personal life I so enjoy my friends and value my time with them. 

[winamac1]

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@Reba055 wrote:

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@winamac1 wrote:

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@MaggieMack wrote:

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@raven-blackbird wrote:

everyone needs a time for silence...........to be wrapped in the still........from the most extroverted person to them most introverted.........in the still is where you find your center and that's important for a balanced life.......................................raven

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@raven-blackbird, I actually do have a couple of extroverted friends who get anxiety when they are alone. I guess the possibility of introspection scares them. They plan their time so it is filled with people, people, people. I can usually spot a serious extrovert because they are the non-stop talkers, not the listeners.

As more and more replies to this thread have come in, I have been surprised at the overwhelming number of introvert-leaning posts. Most of them. So I googled the ratio of introversion to extroversion and it is practically a 50/50 split in the general population, with women being slightly more extroverted than men. Introverts are much more inclined to surf the Internet, so I guess that explains the preponderance of them here. Extroverts are finding their fun out in the world, talking, not reading, lurking, or posting.

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ITA  I have a friend who is divorced with one daughter.  If she's not with her daughter on the weekends, she gets anxiety and has to plan something with someone.  I am one of her best friends, but we are very different in that aspect.  I don't have any problem being alone at all, and I value my alone time.  I do like time with friends--just not constantly.

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I know a few people like that. They can't stand to be alone but then complain to me how this one and that one are driving them crazy. So annoying!

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LOL  OMGosh, my friend does the EXACT same thing, and I call her out on it all the time.  She'll say how she just wants to not have anything to do on this or that day, and then she inevitably ends up with someone somewhere--shoppng/working out/coffee, etc.  She knows not to ask me as she knows I probably won't go--I'm not that much of a last-minute person.  

I love it when I have a weekend with nothing "officially" planned.  I actually get a lot of anxiety if I have too much on the calendar for the weekend.  This weekend I have quite a bit planned-- drinks one night with a few girls, cookout/company, etc. the other night-- and I'm kind of not looking forward to it, LOL.

[mima]

I like being alone.  I can easily entertain myself.  I love tv, computers, reading and online games.  I can go to the gym alone or walk alone.  I also have a dog, so I'm really never alone.

On the other hand, my friend is in deep depression right now because she is single and alone all the time.  She can't entertain herself and I can't help her, I've tried.  I live 2 hours away from her so I can't visit her, but we talk on the phone a lot.  She doesn't like tv, doesn't have a tablet or computer and doesn't like to read.  I was trying to mention things she could do but really got bent out of shape (no pun intended) when I mentioned she could go to the gym.  She thought I was saying she is fat and she is not at all.  She doesn't like any of my suggestions on what she should get out and do.  She even went to a counselor for a while "for something to do" I'm not joking.  I feel sorry for her but I can't help her.

Edited to say:  She doesn't have a dog either and doesn't want one.  She does have an outdoor cat.  She live in the country.

[marden]

I love being alone too.  I'm so happy I found this thread.  I never realized so many people love being by themselves.  Now that I'm retired, I love the time I have to do so many things I couldn't when I worked.  My husband does his thing and I do mine.  I have dogs to keep me company.  We're down to 1 now but that's ok.  My little dog is always by my side so I'm never really alone.  I used to feel guilty about staying at home so much but not any more.  When I worked, I was driving for hours to get to work and when i got there, everything was rush this and rush that.  I'm so glad that's over.  No more rushing.  Thanks so much for this thread.  I've really enjoyed reading all your posts.

[colliegirls]

I am an extrovert so I love being around people but need my alone time also.

[winamac1]

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@winamac1 wrote:

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@Reba055 wrote:

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@winamac1 wrote:

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@MaggieMack wrote:

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@raven-blackbird wrote:

everyone needs a time for silence...........to be wrapped in the still........from the most extroverted person to them most introverted.........in the still is where you find your center and that's important for a balanced life.......................................raven

---

@raven-blackbird, I actually do have a couple of extroverted friends who get anxiety when they are alone. I guess the possibility of introspection scares them. They plan their time so it is filled with people, people, people. I can usually spot a serious extrovert because they are the non-stop talkers, not the listeners.

As more and more replies to this thread have come in, I have been surprised at the overwhelming number of introvert-leaning posts. Most of them. So I googled the ratio of introversion to extroversion and it is practically a 50/50 split in the general population, with women being slightly more extroverted than men. Introverts are much more inclined to surf the Internet, so I guess that explains the preponderance of them here. Extroverts are finding their fun out in the world, talking, not reading, lurking, or posting.

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ITA  I have a friend who is divorced with one daughter.  If she's not with her daughter on the weekends, she gets anxiety and has to plan something with someone.  I am one of her best friends, but we are very different in that aspect.  I don't have any problem being alone at all, and I value my alone time.  I do like time with friends--just not constantly.

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I know a few people like that. They can't stand to be alone but then complain to me how this one and that one are driving them crazy. So annoying!

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LOL  OMGosh, my friend does the EXACT same thing, and I call her out on it all the time.  She'll say how she just wants to not have anything to do on this or that day, and then she inevitably ends up with someone somewhere--shoppng/working out/coffee, etc.  She knows not to ask me as she knows I probably won't go--I'm not that much of a last-minute person.  

I love it when I have a weekend with nothing "officially" planned.  I actually get a lot of anxiety if I have too much on the calendar for the weekend.  This weekend I have quite a bit planned-- drinks one night with a few girls, cookout/company, etc. the other night-- and I'm kind of not looking forward to it, LOL.

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OMG...I now have plans with someone thiursday night, LOL.  I think I'll have anxiety by Thursday.  I so value some alone time.

[Shorty2U]

Lets just say It doesnt bother me to be alone but i do get bored easily! lol.

I like being with my husband and or my kids/grandkids. Since my backs bad and I can no longer work and do heavy duty activities and heavy duty type house work, I am bored most days when my husband is working.

I had my grandkids 2X a week this Summer. It was wonderful. Yesterday was the last, as they start school Wednesday. Thus I am bored again today. lol.

The only time I like to be alone is late nights when I binge watch my dvrd shows and or surf the net while it is quiet.

However, I am soon going to start going through thousands of (real) pictures and finish the photo books I put off for years.

I might add, when I worked and ran around 24/7 doing things and never took time to rest, I used to joke and say calgon take me away. I have regretted those words since my spine surgery in 2001. So watch what you wish for is my advice!