Community Chat

[RainyDayGal]

I'm at the point in my life where I don't care whether or not someone likes me.  I'm not in high school anymore. I have enough going on and enough to worry about.

[Mominohio]

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@KingstonsMom wrote:

I learned a long time ago (from an abusive mother) that not everyone is going to 'like' you, just like I don't necessarily like some people.

It doesn't bother me, I just don't spend time around anyone who I feel doesn't like me nor do I spend time around people I don't like.

That includes 'family', in my case.

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Well said!

It doesn't bother me either. I don't (and never have) found the need to seek other's approval.

Now, if there were many people in my life that I thought didn't like me, then I would have to take a look at myself, and question why, and if the problem might be with me.

[occasionalrain]

Calling or telling in person that you no longer wish to be friends is poor form and agressive which puts them on the defence. Writing to them respectfully gives them time to reflect and prevents either from saying somthing they may later regret. If you suspect they have been saying unpleasant things about before, imagine what they will say now.

[Zhills]

If that person can prejudge and decide they don't like me just by prejudging, I don't think I would want them to be my friend.  I could never trust that they were my friend behind my back.

[Puzzle Piece]

Bother me?  Depends.  Some people I do want to dislike me and to stay away from me.  The toxic ones.  I'm okay that they don't like me - why want them in your life? 

[Hoovermom]

I think all of us want to be liked.  In my experience if people feel comfortable in their own skin, they can like anyone.  Lots of time it is insecurity and always worrrying about what the other person feels about you.

[alliswell]

@reiki604

You are so right and said pretty much precisely the way I feel as well.

I also like this quote from Maya Angelou:  I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

[Moonchilde]

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@LilacTree wrote:

. . . and you don't even know why? 

Do you try to win the person over, or just dismiss it?

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It bothered me when I was young, from childhood through my 20s. As I matured in my thinking and sense of self-worth, it ceased to bother me. 

There are many personality types and personalities out there, each with their own criteria for friendship, liking and disliking.  Because of workload, task delegations, responsibilities, etc. co-workers often dislike or barely coexist with each other.

Some personalities just don't mesh. But it's worth noting that just because someone doesn't like you especially doesn't necessarily mean they automatically DISlike you. I think we feel meh about many people in our lives - they are not important enough to us to matter one way or the other.

Occasionally I have wished I could make an acquaintance into a friend and it didn't happen. But there are limits to my efforts (I won't be who I am not) and if it wasn't meant to be, it wasn't. I've learned to live with that too.

[Deb1010yetagain]

I've had a couple of people take a disliking to me in the workplace because of competitive issues.  I tried to get along for the sake of the project.

I've also had it happen here in the forums... a screen name I don't recognize in the beginning but after they continue to critique my posts in a negative way I take notice.  In that case I really don't care -- they're too afraid to use a recognizable identity,

If it is someone I care about it would bother me too.  Otherwise, to heck with 'em.

[jaxs mom]

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@occasionalrain wrote:

Calling or telling in person that you no longer wish to be friends is poor form and agressive which puts them on the defence. Writing to them respectfully gives them time to reflect and prevents either from saying somthing they may later regret. If you suspect they have been saying unpleasant things about before, imagine what they will say now.

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Considering that it's been 15 years and we don't associate with anyone that knows her or her family nor do we even live in the same part of the country anymore, she can say whatever the heck she wants to. I don't care.