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04-06-2020 04:05 PM
@Jordan2 I am so very sorry for your loss.
This current situation is testing most of us. I admit, there are days I have trouble finding a reason to get up. Yes, I am feeling lonely too. I miss my family; talking on the telephone just isn't the same as seeing them.
I hope you find the comfort you need now. This forum gives us all a way to feel connected. If you need support or just chatter, come here. We're around to support each other.
04-06-2020 05:31 PM
@grandma r wrote:@Jordan2 I am so very sorry for your loss.
This current situation is testing most of us. I admit, there are days I have trouble finding a reason to get up. Yes, I am feeling lonely too. I miss my family; talking on the telephone just isn't the same as seeing them.
I hope you find the comfort you need now. This forum gives us all a way to feel connected. If you need support or just chatter, come here. We're around to support each other.
@grandma r thank you so much. Like you there are days I force myself to get out of bed. I also find I can forget what day of the week it is, today I had to stop and think, was it Monday or Tuesday.
04-06-2020 06:40 PM
@Jordan2. Just take it one step at a time. Give yourself permission to feel sad; it's normal after such a loss.
We lost a family member, who was buried just prior to the lockdown. His widow is so lonely, but, we can't travel to see her. We send good thoughts and virtual hugs to you and all suffering losses at this time.
04-06-2020 06:59 PM
@Jordan2 I am so sorry for your loss.
When you add in the things that are going on now with that loss, it has to be incredibly overwhelming. Take one day at time and try not to look too far down the road.
I wish you peace and good wishes. Be strong.
04-06-2020 07:07 PM
@Jordan2 I could have written this post. I cared for my mother in my home for 4 1/2 years. I took early retirement from teaching to care for her. Teaching friends stopped calling after the first year because my life became about doctor appointments, medications, ER visits, home health visits, and daily concerns of taking care of Mom. She passed almost 2 years ago. I began subbing and getting reacquainted with my friends. Most of my friends have families and grandchildren. I am single with no children. I speak to my sister daily and brother a couple of times a week. I have been calling several friends or texting with them on messenger. It's very isolating not being able to come and go.Texas has been ordered to stay home. I am being complaint except for weekly groceries and the laundromat. I read alot. Weekends are hardest for me. I am not sure why but I have more of a schedule through the week. I have purged every room and have a large donation pile to Goodwill. The weather is nice now so I walk twice a day. I think being alone all day everyday and not seeing others can really get to a person. I am not a hermit by nature. It takes a while to adjust to not being a caregiver 24/7. I think I read you are in NYC so your situation is different from mine. This pandemic will pass eventually. You have my deepest condolences on the loss of your mother. I miss mine terribly.
04-06-2020 07:12 PM
04-06-2020 07:13 PM
Jordan2, I am sorry for the loss of your mom. What would normally be a tough time is compounded by what we are all living thru.
I certainly understand the lonliness. I retired to another state in August. I left my sister, nephew, friends behind because I wanted to be near the beach. I do have a cousin here that I'm close to, but she is married and I can't depend on her as my social network. It has been hard and sometimes I question if I did the right thing.
But on the positive side, I found an on call substitute job in the local school district as a teacher's aide. A little hard being around younger students as I worked with high schoolers. But they are so cute, I got into it very quickly. I would usually work 2 mornings or afternoons per week.
And I also had another part time job (3 days/week) in a local jewelry store. I had been working there about a month before all this. It was good, meeting alot of people moving into the area.
I also joined a Meet-Up group (actually 2) for women 50+. Was just starting to make friends, going to dinner - having a social life again. My cousin and I also joined 2 local senior groups and did some of the bus trips.
Then this ... now like it's back to my first few weeks when I moved here. I never married so I'm use to being alone. But this is so different. Even though we call, text, etc., I miss my sister, miss my nephews and my nephew's wife is pregnant.
I don't know your age group. But after we are past all this, maybe a senior club, your local library, a meet up that works for you, church group, or even a grief group at your local hospital, would help you.
I will keep you in my thoughts.
04-06-2020 09:52 PM
I'm okay. When it hits me, I take a walk or a drive. Put Pandora on blue tooth and select my favorites. Married to a nice guy and have family and friends who text and email. Wave at neighbors. I live on a short cul de sac and majority of neighbors are retired. I'm beyond fortunate - plus, I'm not an extrovert or a peoply person and can recharge on my own.
But it's tough on people who are alone or who prefer people to help them recharge. Drove by a friend's house today. She came out on the porch and waved then moved her chair about 20 feet from my car and let me know how she was. She's a widow and children don't live in town. Misses husband, kids and 5 grandchildren. She re-located in little town and was just getting started meeting people. Like many mentioned -- you were on your way to more social lifestyles then it came to a halt. My friend cried she was so lonely. Broke my heart. She's a huge people person.
04-07-2020 07:07 AM
Luckily, no.
04-07-2020 07:43 AM
@Jordan2 I'm going to make a suggestion-reconnect with your sister while you can.
Whatever the reason you are not close is not important.
I'm sorry for the loss of your dear mother; I'm sorry you are alone.
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