Community Chat

[viva923]

i live within 20 minutes of each of my kids. they live in different small towns, but live just down the road. we are in the middle of the kids

[Buck-i-Nana]

All three of my adult children live in the same town as I do.  We are all about 10 minutes away from each other.  I'm very happy with this and feel truly blessed and my 2 dils and 1 sil seem very happy as well.

I think what has made this all work so well for us is respect for each other.  My kids know if they want advice from me to ask, I don't volunteer advice.  I have a very good relationship with the spouses of my kids as well, and part of that I believe is that I spoke very honestly with each once the decisions to marry were announced.  I made sure they knew and understood my no-interference and no advice without asking policy.  I also made sure each knew that I know everyone has times that perhaps things are misunderstood and to please please please always feel free to openly and honestly talk to me about anything.

A biggie, at least for me, is being able to take care of my younger grandkids on occasion, but to be able to say no when asked, if I don't feel up to it or have other plans.

The fact your kids have asked you carries a lot of weight.  I hope it works out as well for you as it has for me!

[Julie928]

I think it's great that your family wants you guys to be closer to them.  My husband & I bought the house next-door to my mom & step-dad.  Yep, right next-door!  Yes, sometimes they drive me nuts and I'm sure I make them crazy but it's nice to be so close.  My mom & I run errands together almost every day.  We go over there most Sundays for dinner.  Hey ~ you can't beat the travel time, lol!  It's nice to know they are right there and vice versa.  I'm happy for you.  :-)

[chrystaltree]

We are close family and we enjoy each other's company; so, I don't think any of us would move very far away frome the family.  Hubby and I have talked about spending the cold months in FL after we retire but we would never live there permanently.  We want real relationhips with our grandchildren, we don't want to be visitors in their lives.  One daughter lives about 70 miles away and that feels like along distance to me because I can't just pop over when a visit is convenient.  My other daughter lives about 20 minutes away.

[Starpolisher]

I live 45 minutes to an hour away from each of my sons. My oldest, his wife and my granddaughter live to the south of us and my youngest lives to the north of us. We are in the middle, same state. I see my oldest once or twice a week when we go to visit/babysit our granddaughter. It's wonderful! The youngest calls often but we usually only see him on holidays and birthdays.

[gmkb]

A daughter lives 10 minutes away and a son lives 45 minutes away.  Another daughter lives in the North, but they are hoping to be in Florida in a year or so. We were fortunate they came to us.

Wishing you good times with your family.  The move is probably a wise decision.

[on the bay]

I know a lot of mothers (me included) that always say we would be happy if we all lived in the same state!

You sound excited and I hope you will have many wonderful times together with your loving family who want you there to experience all the family times together.

[dulwich]

Thank you so much for all your replies.  I am very active - and both DH and I very healthy.  I swim, aerobics, walking regularly and take any craft lessons available and one thing my daughter said was you will make me do more stuff!  so I think we will keep our own identities but as my granddaughter said "Nana think of all the rock concerts we can go to".  I love live rock concerts and we have done quite a few of these together.

I appreciate all your advice and remarks thank you all.

[Havarti]

I have friends and relatives that have upped and moved to follow their children who moved. In every one of those situations the children moved specifically to get away from their parents, to spread their wings and evolve better as a couple and/or young family. Only to have the parents miss them so much they just had to follow them to their precious new beginning. Most were the mothers who felt their daughter was their best friend and just could not live without being ever-present in her life. My heart broke for the kids in each of these situations. They wanted distance.

Your situation is totally different! Your family misses you and are asking you to come back home to them. They initiated it. That speaks volumes about the relationship you & your husband have with them. Feel honored – you deserve it! If it is what both sides want go forward with your plans and enjoy your added time with each other.

[dulwich]

@Havarti   What kind comments thank you.  Out family has been asking us to move for about 2 years now.  We are very aware not to intrude on their lives but we do have fun together and of course upsets too but soon over and forgotten.