Community Chat

[Lotus]

One to two years....... depending on the couple's ages and how long they have dated .However.....there are too many factors to consider in most situations, and everyone's lives are unique.

Five years is too long IMO though.

[Shorty2U]

I think if the engagement goes over 2 years someone in the relationship has a commitment issue.

[I am still oxox]

We moved in together May 1991, engaged Aug 92 and married May 93, yesterday was our 21st wedding anniversary

[ID2]

I was engaged for 4 years. We've been together for 40 years, married 36.

[Jamma]

Can only say what worked for us.

We worked for the same company. Started dating in July---he proposed in Sept. and we were married the following June. Coming up on 52 yrs.

Jamma

[goodstuff]

What I "believe in" doesn't matter much. How long an engagement lasts is up to the individual couple involved. There are all kinds of reasons for long engagements -- some healthy and reasonable, some perhaps less so.......but it's up to the couple to decide. DH and I were engaged for only about five months before our wedding, so I guess the answer for us was "no".

Of course, some cohabiting couples nowadays refer to themselves as "engaged" and "my fiance" when they have no concrete plans at all for marriage. It's a way of putting off permanent decisions and making their living arrangement perhaps more palatable for more traditional/conservative friends and relatives.

[Marienkaefer2]

I was engaged for five years, although I didn't really call it "being engaged" for that whole time. We were together, we knew we would get married. It just worked this way for us with other things going on in our lives.

It's different for everyone, and this is something so personal that I don't think.others should judge on this.

[shoptilyadropagain]

It would never work for me but for other couples, that is their decision.

[terrier3]

I have a client who has been engaged (and living with) a woman for 30 years. He is in his 70s now.

He is a divorced Catholic and told his fiancée they can't marry until his first wife dies.

They even went to Rome & got a blessing from John Paul II (he didn't know they were living together though - it was a larger assembly).

[PurpleBunny]

My brother was engaged for 3-4 years. They never married.