Divorce - American Style - Page 3

blackhole99 · ‎08-22-2013

I trusted my husband with our money until I found out in our first year of marriage that I had no money. I worked full time and had no money! I found out by accident that my name was not on our checking or savings account because he paid all the bills and made all the financial decisions. He gave me an allowance, so I really never questioned him about our money. Well, I told him if he didn't remedy the situation PDQ, I was quitting my job and going home and filing for a divorce. He complied and I have taken care of our money ever since.

mousiegirl · ‎03-09-2010

@Noel7 wrote:
@Annabellethecat66
@Annabellethecat66 wrote:
Lately I know two females who are being divorced by their husbands.

You'd think I'd be a little familiar with this since everyone in my family (sisters, etc) have been divorced at least two times. My mother was divorced 5 times (remarried two guys 2 and 3 times!). However, I didn't live with her so wasn't familiar with any of what goes on.

This system is so unfair to the woman! I can't believe that many of these women haven't worked or if they did years ago and have absolutely no income.

The husband closes up all of the accounts and moves on. These women have nowhere to turn. Sure they have lawyers who are working for them, but in the meantime they have no money and nowhere to get it! What are they expected to do?

This is a hole in the law that allows this to happen! I have been so upset hearing about this. What are they expected to do?

Anyone go through this? What does it say about the 'system' that allows this to happen?

Surely you must have this wrong. Doesn't your state have community property? Whatever they have in assets should be split between the spouses.

@Noel7 That is during/after the divorce proceedings, until then, unless the wife saves, she has nothing to live on until the divorce and property, etc, is determined, as the husband can do what Annabelle stated. This has't changed in eons, shocking, but true.

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

@Snowpuppy wrote:
Emergency child support?

Custody is usually not an issue. You come home, he's long gone, no where to be found. There. You have been awarded custody.

That is definitely not always the case.

Kachina624 · ‎03-10-2010

@Snowpuppy wrote:
"These Women" made a choice to not have a income of their own.

My own beloved grandmother was an immigrant, spoke little English, never drove and didn't work outside the home.

Yet she insisted that a woman have her "pin money" to keep her safe. She always said she had money from the sale of her farm eggs when they lived on the farm. Just in case grandad took off with a floozie from the saloon.

I didn't listen to her when I was young. After all, my stupid girlfriends said "well, he'll just have to take care of you".

@Snowpuppy A woman should also establish credit in her own name right from the start of the marriage.

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment

SydneyH · ‎03-10-2010

I'd like to think that most woman in this day and age, married or not, have their own savings fund, if they don't....too bad I guess.

Bri36 · ‎02-20-2017

@SydneyH, a lot of women don't. They don't think they need their own money, their own credit, and their own way to survive in case of death or divorce.

It amazes me how many women turn over all the finances to their husband and have no idea what they have or what they owe.

It can take weeks to get a lawyer and go to court to get something to live on.

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

It seems to me this state has so many more protections for women than quite a few others. Another way to get money owed, as in ordered by the court, is to garnish his wages.

It seems there is still a lot of work to be done for women's rights.

SydneyH · ‎03-10-2010

@Bri36 wrote:
@SydneyH, a lot of women don't. They don't think they need their own money, their own credit, and their own way to survive in case of death or divorce.

It amazes me how many women turn over all the finances to their husband and have no idea what they have or what they owe.

It can take weeks to get a lawyer and go to court to get something to live on.

I'm under the impression the percentage of these women is dropping drastically, heck, it's my first advice to my sons, keep your own savings separate.......cuz you never know, period.

Bri36 · ‎02-20-2017

@SydneyH wrote:
@Bri36 wrote:
@SydneyH, a lot of women don't. They don't think they need their own money, their own credit, and their own way to survive in case of death or divorce.

It amazes me how many women turn over all the finances to their husband and have no idea what they have or what they owe.

It can take weeks to get a lawyer and go to court to get something to live on.
I'm under the impression the percentage of these women is dropping drastically, heck, it's my first advice to my sons, keep your own savings separate.......cuz you never know, period.

I don't know the stats on that.

Good advice for your sons.

We've always told our girls to be self-sufficient and never to depend on a man.

Noel7 · ‎03-09-2010

My grandmother told me to have my own money and I made sure of it... still, after all these years. I tell my daughter the same thing and suggest a pre-nup.