Community Chat

[chiclet]

When I have lunch with friends it seems we mostly eat at about the same rate.  My husband however eats so slow it drives me crazy.  It is not like we have a lot to talk about since we are retired and are together 24/7.  I am done eating, go to bathroom, apply lipstick, ask for the bill, pay it and still waiting.  When he sees my plate is empty he goes a little faster.  At home I just eat and then get up and start cleaning up and leave him eating by himself.  He appears to be eating constantly but the food seems to still be there.  For years thought it was me since I do everything fast but when we have gone out with other people everyone is done and waiting for him.  He is very overweight and eats a lot but even when we go out and he orders the exact same thing it is the same.

[AngelPuppy1]

@Black Cat Back

I don't blame you for wanting to take your time and enjoy the meal, the frienship and the whole experience!  I am the same way.  I don't think I am a pokey eater but I don't wolf my food down either.  I love to go out and eat and seldom do.  So, when I do go, I really want to take my time and enjoy the whole thing.  

Maybe your friend is used to eating with a time limit such as when you work and have only a certain amount of time for lunch.  Or maybe she hurries in the evening so she can take care of her family and other matters.  

I would have felt a bit awkward myself but still I would have just continued on as you did and not allowed myself to hurry and eat and make myself feel uncomfortable.  I feel that after you eat your main meal and if you still want to linger and talk afterwards there is the opportunity if you want to have more coffee, a sweet or an after dinner drink.  But everone is different.

And I also agree about the server.  She could have left your friends plates, etc. for awhile.  

[Mom2Dogs]

@Black Cat Back...I did reply to this thread earlier but I do think you are getting jumped on a bit....you put in writing something that I would have said to my dh...except instead of 1 response you got a lot of responses, pro and con....!

As you stated you were more irked with the waitress not the friend, she probably has no idea that she out paced you in the eating department....just like the friend I mentioned...we are great friends and her habit at the dinner table is irritating but certainly would not make me cut ties with her, I imagine I do things that irk her as well!

[debic]

LOL, well maybe she wanted to eat it while it was hot instead of gabbing?  I'm from a large family and I practically had to eat my meals running, I eat slow now.   I'm always the last to finish a meal I rarely notice tho.  

I'm more surprised that anyone would be offended that plates are being removed.   That's their job, remove empty plates as quickly as possible.   Most customers see this as a plus as opposed to having them sitting in front of you.   Also the complaint of not wanting to see the salad or next course until they are done with the soup?  Would you rather it sit under the lights?   Not too many restaurants can hold your food until you are done.

[flickerbulb]

I am a very slow eater. I had a friend who would wolf down his food and then leave me by myself to step outside to smoke. That ticked me off to no end. The irony is he was always spouting off what was appropriate behavior and then turn around and pull the dine and ditch.

[insomniac]

I didn't read all the posts, but I want to address a particular aspect of the thread: having to wait around alone while others leave to smoke. I HATE THAT.

[mima]

I eat lunch with a friend every Friday.  I eat faster than her.  BUT the reason is when we sit down, she talks non-stop while I'm eating.  Then she realizes all she has done is talk so then she says "OK, you talk now while I eat".  And that is pretty much how we do it I guess.  We've did it for years and it doesn't bother me.

[violann]

I eat at my own rate (S-L-O-W-L-Y) and there is no way I can describe in words how little I care how fast or slow someone else eats, AND if I were eating with someone who left a blob of food on his or her plate as a gesture of courtesy I'd consider that a very strange gesture INDEED. 

WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT!!!!!

I think everything you did was perfectly FINE, Hot Street!

[151949]

I am a fast eater - 42 years of 5 min lunch breaks have created a habit. If i am finished and who ever i am with is not I will order a cup of tea, if I really want it or not, it gives me something to do to make the tea and then something edible in front of me so the other person is not uncomfortable while they finish.

We have a friend who we often eat out with and he had neck cancer - he eats painfully slowly - having to gulp a lot of water with his food to get it down. When the rest of us are done we just sit and chat while he continues to struggle to eat. It's important not to make him laugh though or he chokes.So if we do make him laugh he says we are trying to kill him off.

[Campion]

Eating fast is a bad habit, unfortunately now encouraged by schools having meal times for kids that can be five or ten minutes long to wolf down the food, after waiting in line, etc.

In Europe, we took a LONG time for lunches. It was the main meal for many of us, dinner being usually some yogurt or bread and cheese for many families. I learned to slow down.

Eating fast also can contribute to weight gain, as you don't feel satiety if you eat too quickly. The brain takes time to catch up and realize you've eaten.

If your friend eats quickly, attribute it to bad habits acquired through no fault of her own. The waitress should not have cleared the table, but everyone is impatient to get you away and out these days. Restaurants that rush tables annoy me too--again, in Europe it is your table until you decide it's not, but here in the US, they like to cycle the tables to maximize receipts. 

You'll just have to forgive her.