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Honored Contributor
Posts: 31,023
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

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My two daughters have been living in their own since shortly after they graduated college.  They returned home only for a few months to save money for their own apartments.  They are in their mid thirties now with husbands, kids, careers.  My sister's son  has always been like our child.  She was 18 when she had him.  She was like a big sister to him. She went off to college two months after he was born and left him with my parents.  I was home with my own kids, I pitched in.  He was a smart kid but never interested in schools or careers.  He just bounced from one job to another.  It takes some people a long time to grow up.  He married, had a daughter and they all live with us.  They were in debt with bad credit.  The apartment they lived in  They couldn't afford a decent apartment and didn't have the credit to get one anyway.  The original plan was they would pay off their debts, repair their credit and get their own place.  But 6 years later, we're all with the situation and living here is much better for their daughter who is like a grandchild to us.  I love and adore that little girl.  Two of my friends also have adult children living with them.  Sometimes it just works out better that way for everyone.

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,850
Registered: ‎06-08-2021

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

@chrystaltree  What a lucky little girl!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,079
Registered: ‎05-11-2013

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

My adult DD moved bac home when her Dad was diagnosed with cancer in 2015. His Drs., radition treatments and the hospital where he had his surgery are all 70 miles round trip. He had daily radition treatments 5 days a wee for 7 and 1/2 weeks. 

 

When he died in 2019 from a blocked intestion, he threw up and aspirated it into his lung. He got pneumonia, sepsis followed, organs shut down.

 

DD stayed on here.  I had a hip replacement 8 months before DH died and a knee replacement 6 months after.

 

DD pays certain bills, doesn't mind  grocery shopping (a job I loathe).  She does her own laundary, I do most of the cooking although weekends she stuff on the Ninja Grill. She does the harder cleaning that my wonky back dislies.

 

We don't answer to each other. We get along so I have no problem with her here.

 

She is 53 yrs. old and I certainly don't make her follow rules and curfrews.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,508
Registered: ‎07-10-2011

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?


@CrazyKittyLvr2 wrote:

My adult DD moved bac home when her Dad was diagnosed with cancer in 2015. His Drs., radition treatments and the hospital where he had his surgery are all 70 miles round trip. He had daily radition treatments 5 days a wee for 7 and 1/2 weeks. 

 

When he died in 2019 from a blocked intestion, he threw up and aspirated it into his lung. He got pneumonia, sepsis followed, organs shut down.

 

DD stayed on here.  I had a hip replacement 8 months before DH died and a knee replacement 6 months after.

 

DD pays certain bills, doesn't mind  grocery shopping (a job I loathe).  She does her own laundary, I do most of the cooking although weekends she stuff on the Ninja Grill. She does the harder cleaning that my wonky back dislies.

 

We don't answer to each other. We get along so I have no problem with her here.

 

She is 53 yrs. old and I certainly don't make her follow rules and curfrews.

 


@CrazyKittyLvr2  let's just say it's working. I love it!!!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,843
Registered: ‎11-16-2014

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?


@Lakelife62 wrote:

@Trinity11 wrote:

Please don't compare your situation to other families. You instinctively know what is best for your daughter. It sounds like you are doing everything right.

 

Both my kids left home on full college scholarships but even summers they worked and never came home to live. After college they both eventually went to law school on free rides. Highly successful in their careers, I rarely if ever see them. They have their own lives and time is precious. Between their trips all over the world and business travel mom and dad are fit into schedules with little time to see us.

 

So for all those parents with kids that set the world on fire, there is a downside not often spoken of. Most won't share that aspect ....🥺 

 

@ninjawife , your daughter sounds like she is really trying and I congratulate you on that! You clearly have her back. She will succeed!


They'll be back. They can only be in GO mode for so long, even if they're in highly competitive professions. Eventually, we all slow down a bit and reprioritize.  Hang in there, mama!


One is 38 the other will be 48. They won't be back @Lakelife62 . They visit on some holidays...but it is what it is. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,205
Registered: ‎04-19-2016

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

I don't think there are any set rules. Depends on the situation.  Now a days with the expensive of everything makes more sense to stay at home and pitch in.  No rush in my book.

 

 

 

 

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,688
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

I cried when my last moved out to live with his girlfriend, now wife for 30+years.  He is now 62 and a grandfather.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 43,455
Registered: ‎01-08-2011

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

No.  WE lost our younger son in a wreck before he turned 20.  The older son got married at 24.  They and 2 GS lived with us for over a week when their house burned about 5 years ago.  We were glad to help.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,281
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

@ECBG   I am so very sorry you lost your child.

 

I wish you peace.

"Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are." BF
Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,591
Registered: ‎09-01-2010

Re: Did you have or Do you have now adult children living at home and Why?

Yes; because they love where we live and don't want to live anywhere else.   With my husbands declining health, they are very helpful with doing what needs to be done here.