Community Chat

[lgfan]

Twenty-one is still young to be out on your own. I don't see why your daughter should move out when she will probably need roommates to help with her expenses. She should continue with her therapy and finishing her education. That should be her main priority.

[sann]

My two sons are very independent and have been on their own since their college days, and for that I'm extremely grateful 😊

[wagirl]

My DD and I have an apartment now. She came home during the 2008 recession . She is working full time and has been the last 17 years or so. She hasn't been able to find a place of her own as the cost of housing/renting is stupid expensive even for a tiny place. She was there in 2012 when I was dx with breast cancer, and then in 2021, we both had to move out of our house due to my divorcing  and then selling the house. Things are pretty good. I am retired and take care of the homefront and she still works every day. We would love to find a house to buy but prices are still through the roof. OH yes---and brought the true boss of the house with us---a 13 year old, grey stripey cat named Echo---

[ninjawife]

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@lgfan wrote:
Twenty-one is still young to be out on your own. I don't see why your daughter should move out when she will probably need roommates to help with her expenses. She should continue with her therapy and finishing her education. That should be her main priority.

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@lgfan I guess you didn't read my post where I said she is no where near ready.  She still has to get her license, find a steady job, learn to adult and develop more mature brain functioning.  Older DD has been out on her own since she was 23.  She found a job outside our local area n Washington DC.  Housing is expensive there so she does have a roomate.  Her current roomate is her BFF from high school. 

[lgfan]

Ninjawife I did read your post. I am agreeing with you. I said that she should continue with her therapy and in finishing her education. I said that twenty-one was still too young for her to be on her own.

[Janey2]

Americans tend to want/ need their grown children out of the house fast.in many other cultures generations live together without problems. I see nothing wrong with grown children living with parents if everyone gets along or there are medical problems. Yes, people have to grow up and be responsible for themselves but it can be done while living with parents. It all comes down to working. As long as the grown child can support himself/herself I see nothing wrong with multigenerational living.it is the grown kid who refuses to work ( unless there are medical problems) that I would be concerned about.

[lgfan]

I agree with you Janey2. I don't see how rushing a child to live on his/her own before they are ready is making them responsible.

[LindaSal]

I feel every child is different and some require staying home longer than others.  In my case my son could have lived on his own since the 3rd grade, LOL!   He is and always was very responsible.  My daughter on the other hand took a bit longer to grasp life and move on.   Very different personalities.   He went away for college and she went locally as she didn't want to be far from home.   All in all, they are both kind , productive people and I am quite proud of them.   I always felt they could stay home as long as they needed to, as long as they contributed somewhat to the household.   

[ScrapHappy]

My daughter is a rishing HS senior.  Thinking about her going off to college sometimes brings tears to me eyes.  I'm also happy and excited for her.  But, I worry, she's naive.  Easily taken advantage of.  My parents didn't "push" me out of their house.  I have told my daughter that this is her home, the door is always open.

[hckynutjohn]

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@Janey2 wrote:

Americans tend to want/ need their grown children out of the house fast.in many other cultures generations live together without problems. I see nothing wrong with grown children living with parents if everyone gets along or there are medical problems. Yes, people have to grow up and be responsible for themselves but it can be done while living with parents. It all comes down to working. As long as the grown child can support himself/herself I see nothing wrong with multigenerational living.it is the grown kid who refuses to work ( unless there are medical problems) that I would be concerned about.

@Janey2 

I couldn't wait for the last 2 of my 3 older sisters to move out of the house. Was longing to have a bedroom of my own. They advanced their educations after they got married and moved out. 

My mom was full Italian and there was no such thing as multigenerational living in her Italian family. She came from Italy at a very young age. Like I said, my sisters moving out was my dream world.

I was working and contributing to our home finances every year, stsrting from age 12. Lived with my mother until she died, when I was 29 years old. The last many years our home deed was put in my name, mostly because of stupid IRS reasons that made zero sense.

hckynut 🇺🇸

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