Community Chat

[dooBdoo]

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@Noel7 wrote:

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@LdyBugz wrote:

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@Moonchilde wrote:

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@deepwaterdotter wrote:

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@LdyBugz wrote:

I don't know why anyone even bothers to respond to such posters.  I think the key is to just ignore them.  Why stoop to their level? 

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This is an excellent suggestion.

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It's not always all about simply not responding, though. If someone starts a really ridiculous unpleasantly critical thread and no one posts in it, the ugly words are still there for all to see, and they should not be because they invariably violate forum Standards. The posts need to be gone. If no one responds at all in any way, the greater the likelihood the ugliness will stay visible for quite a while.

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Yes, the posting might stay if no one reports it as inappropriate or the moderators don't catch it right out of the gate.  Even if it never gets deleted though, I think zero responses to the original post would speak much more loudly.

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I can tell you for sure, that hasn't worked here.  We've had a few trolls here for several years and they never gave up until they were eventually banned.

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          This is a tough call for me.    I don't reply to what appears to be intentional pot-stirring as much as I used to because I realized quite often the moderators will now take out the offensive posts...  and it's really true that it's nice to see those posts sit unanswered, ignored, almost "shunned" by other posters until the remark is zapped.   At the same time, I understand wanting to reply, to correct misinformation, or just to ask why a person even wants to post such things...   it's hard to sit on my hands, and sometimes I can't do it!

[Marp]

A very simple check is to re-read your vent, complaint, criticism and substitue the person being posted about with yourself, a parent, child or other loved one.  If what was said would upset you or you would be upset if it were said about your loved one hit cancel.  If what is written is okay to say about you or your loved one hit submit.

[dooBdoo]

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@Marp wrote:

A very simple check is to re-read your vent, complaint, criticism and substitue the person being posted about with yourself, a parent, child or other loved one.  If what was said would upset you or you would be upset if it were said about your loved one hit cancel.  If what is written is okay to say about you or your loved one hit submit.

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          I love this, @Marp!    I think that's why the harsh judgments make me cringe, and probably one reason  I've never been a fan of gossip sites.    Each person is flesh and blood, a human being, and someone's beloved, and we really do not know who might read what we choose to write.

[SunValley]

I was glad to see that the posters who enjoyed the daily positive thread have found a way to continue their friendship with their new version. Many threads about happy events fizzle out from reader apathy or transition into posters trading barbs. The threads that get immediate traction and action on the boards are the ones that criticize hosts and vendors for their appearance or opinion expressed. For some reason the things that irritate people are more popular to hash over than the pleasant things, and along with the criticism, these threads occasionally produce some humorous and witty exchanges. The mods do a pretty good job of weeding out the really nasty ones. Before the guidelines were tightened and the mods became more visible, these boards could set your hair on fire. Some of the comments about hosts and vendors were truly horrid.

[Juniebugz]

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@Marp wrote:

Could--yes.  Should--yes.  Will--not likely.

There should be a forum where only hosts and vendors can post  what they think of us.

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Back to the topic

ITA @Marp.

[coco14]

Once again, a thread goes completely off topic!  Wow.  Somehow it became a war of words between opposing coasts?

[dooBdoo]

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@coco14 wrote:

Once again, a thread goes completely off topic!  Wow.  Somehow it became a war of words between opposing coasts?

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          True, @coco14.    I wish this didn't happen so often, and it's the reason so many threads go south.    I'll apologize to you and also say I hope the thread will be allowed to return to your interesting topic.

[cody2]

Thanks for the reminder doo. I agree that I have never understood the purpose of putting down hosts. They are human just as we are. What possible satisfaction could come from public shaming of a sales person on television? I like some hosts better then others. But none of them bother me enough to come here and complain about. I like what another poster said. "Just because we can, doesn't mean we should".

[JaneMarple]

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@Moonchilde wrote:

I had a post going that I deleted, because I cannot say (I think most of us cannot say) that we have never ever said a single unkind thing about a host or vendor; I have.

But for me it's relatively rare, as whatever I might *think*, I do try not to say it here, because there's no POINT except to be **tchy. Can't say I NEVER have, I'm neither that perfect nor that "kind."

I certainly don't make a daily or weekly habit of it, like some for whom it must actually be their entertainment. Maybe they start so many threads because the moderators poof so many and the "joy" is too short-lived?

I read the itsy-bitsy nit-picky ones, and the OTT down & dirty nasty ones, and think how unfortunate for that person's friends or family, because I'm sure they are happy to critique everyone they know that way. The one lady in the small town that everyone avoids because just crossing her path will get you --tch-slapped.

We all have opinions. We don't all have to make all of them public all the time just because we "can."

I believe that some constructive criticism of the hosts and vendors could be helpful to their careers because they may have quirks that are not attractive and/or could turn off prospective consumers. But the petty remarks can be quite childish.

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