Community Chat

[Mainz]

My husband and I saved up and paid for every dime of our daughter's college education and bought her a brand new car to go to school in, no loans and no help from the taxpayer, thank you very much. It's one of the reasons we only had one child--we wanted to be able to give her that, as well as get her started in life without the burden of loans to pay back. Now I'm happy to say she has that education and will be starting her first teaching job in the fall. Problem is she's engaged to be married next summer and wants a huge, elaborate wedding. I myself went to the Justice of the Peace to get married because I didn't want the expense or hassle. She hasn't necessarily asked me for money, but she tells me about her plans, and she's hinting.

I can't bring myself to be happy about all this wedding business because I just don't agree with it. I don't want to shell out any money and don't want to listen to her complain about not being able to decide whether she should have this person or that person as her bridesmaid or whatever other decisions that have to be made. I'm also not happy that she's choosing to go in debt for a wedding when we worked so hard to get her started in life debt-free. And, of course, I'm feeling guilty. Any advice to get me through this next year?