Community Chat

[shannara]

We are attending the wedding of a very nice young man who did a college internship under my husband's management at his place of work. Hubby and I were discussing how much we should give for a wedding gift. I always think it should be more than he says. Don't really want to ask other guests who are associates of my husband as it is none of our business what anyone else gives. I have no idea what other people give and therefore don't know if we're being generous (which I always prefer to be) or not.

Husband considers him to be a friend and occasionally plays golf with him but they are not in our immediate social circle and are young enough to be our children. What would you consider a generous gift for this relationship? Thanks for your opinions.

[scotttie]

Are you attending the reception? That makes a difference. You want to be sure to cover the cost of your meal plus.

I think that there are suggestions on google for this. I remember reading one time what the parameters were but I can't remember.

[Mominohio]

I'm sure this type of thing also is measured by your income. For us, considering the relationship you mentioned as well, we would be inclined to give about $50, maybe up to $100 if we knew him well. More than that would be a struggle for us to part with at one time for such an event.

[Cranberries]

Give what you can afford and give what you feel comfortable with.

[donovan]

There is no such rule as 'cover your plate'. How am I supposed to know how much your reception cost? That would mean that someone I don't know very well but they had an expensive wedding would get more from me than my niece who had a modest one.

I give based on how close I am with the bride or groom. Family members get more $$ no matter if they have a huge wedding or a piece of cake in the church basement. And then it goes downhill from there.

[scotttie]

On 5/21/2014 donovan said:

There is no such rule as 'cover your plate'. How am I supposed to know how much your reception cost? That would mean that someone I don't know very well but they had an expensive wedding would get more from me than my niece who had a modest one.

I give based on how close I am with the bride or groom. Family members get more $$ no matter if they have a huge wedding or a piece of cake in the church basement. And then it goes downhill from there.

I didn't make that up. I read it someplace.

[deepwaterdotter]

I just attended the wedding of a former co-worker and gifted the new couple a $50 bill.

[tansy]

Meet in the middle of what your husband and you think is appropriate.

[gidgetgh]

On 5/21/2014 scotttie said:

Are you attending the reception? That makes a difference. You want to be sure to cover the cost of your meal plus.

I think that there are suggestions on google for this. I remember reading one time what the parameters were but I can't remember.

Ya know.... until I read this here a few years ago I had never heard of having your wedding gift cover the cost of your meal. Never. How in the heck are you supposed to know the cost of your meal? Call and ask them? Scottie- not giving you a hard time at all- just using your post as I've heard that a lot here.

I've always just gotten something off the registry and have sprung for a higher priced item if it's someone close to me.

In this case, if you're sending money instead of a gift, I'd send $50 I guess.

[Photo Donna]

On 5/21/2014 scotttie said:

Are you attending the reception? That makes a difference. You want to be sure to cover the cost of your meal plus.

I think that there are suggestions on google for this. I remember reading one time what the parameters were but I can't remember.

I disagree -- the gift is the gift and should have no connection to what someone is spending on a reception.

$50 to $150 depending on your situation and how well you know the couple.