Community Chat

[151949]

On 12/27/2014 Clover29 said:

When I was a new bride in the 1980s, I had a "gift list" that went to all the relatives on both sides. The items were things we wanted/needed, and I tried to be broad with descriptions, like "frying pan" rather than "$90 frying pan from store X". My side got me things from the list, his side got me random junk that wasn't on the list and was no use to us, but obviously appealed to them.

I particularly hated the peach candlewick bedspread, when I'd asked for white or floral duvet covers. And the rainbow striped towels, when I asked for white or blue.

Yeah, I'm a steamin' ingrate. But I always either buy off the list, or, if the list is silly-expensive, give a gift card or cash. The stuff we got, we gave to Goodwill.

Why would you give gifts you didn't want to Goodwill instead of returning them to get things you did want or need?

[151949]

It is indeed a sad state of affairs that Americans have become so greedy and entitled feeling. This bride probably has no idea what ever that she was wrong to only put such expensive items on her registry or that - sadly - she probably will not get any of them.

[muttmom]

Bridal registries have suggestions for gifts. No one says a shower gift or wedding gift must be on the bridal registry. If you think the items are too expensive, don't buy them Give whatever you wish. I'd rather give a gift card to a store I knew the bride would shop then a random gift.

Back in my day we registered for expensive china, silver and crystal. Today's registry have expanded. Our shower invitation frequently included bed size, colors for kitchen, bedroom and bathroom.

[brii]

Why do people get offended at what brides and grooms put on their registries?. Give what you want...

[KYToby]

I agree with the others regarding a gift card instead of a registry gift. I do have to say, though, that I do not find the prices unrealistic.

If the bride or groom enjoys cooking, those prices are reasonable for good kitchen equipment. I have spent quite a bit more on some of my knives and pots and pans because I enjoy cooking and feel good equipment is worth the price.

I know there are people who post here who think $350 for knives is overpriced but would think nothing of spending the same on a purse. Others would think $90 for a skillet to be used for years is frivolous but think nothing of spending more than that on a pair of shoes which may only be worn a few times.

My personal opinion is give what you can afford and are comfortable giving, but withhold judgment as I am sure there are things you purchase that many others would find silly and frivolous.

[JustJules]

On 12/28/2014 CelticCrafter said:

I've decided to do what Jules suggested.

A pretty set of mixing bowls with measuring cups, measuring spoons, wooden spoons, wire whisk and a favorite recipe with the non-perishable ingredients measured into a mason jar.

I was so upset when I read the registry...

CelticCrafter, I think that will make a lovely gift. It's unique and from you, and I'm sure the bride to be will get lots of use from it. When I got married back in the 90's we were very young and needed to start our own household, even though we got a few things from our parents. My fiance was out of state serving in the AF, so I was the one that selected the registry items with the help of my mom and his mom. I selected mostly very affordable items, with a few pricier ones because we both had some family that could purchase those for us. I wasn't trying to be greedy and appreciated all gifts. Not all our china place settings were purchased (think they were $50 each back then) so our parents bought us the ones left over. Many of the gifts we received have either broken, got lost, or just wore out, but one of my most favorite gifts was from my best friend's mom who gave me a set of 3 mixing bowls that I had not registered for, and would not have found for myself. I have used them so many times and always think of her. The marriage didn't last but I still have those mixing bowls. Hope you enjoy the bridal shower and the wedding.

[shamalamadingdong4]

I like the idea of going in with another shower guest if possible. Otherwise, get her a gift card or something of your choosing.

[LilacTree]

I keep thinking of the two dishtowels my husband's aunt gave us as a wedding present, and I just can't help cracking up!

[BellaPaprika]

This is quite common now. A family member a few years ago posted a $300 slow cooker on her registry. I have a perfectly fine one that cost me $35 at Walmart. You know it's not ""required"" that you stick with what's on their registry. You can give whatever you want and from now on I think I will.

[151949]

It is difficult for us older ladies to understand how brides think these days. When I was married back in 1969 a normal shower gift was a set of t towels and pot holders, a blanket or a set of sheets. A normal wedding gift was a small appliance like a toaster or coffee pot or from someone very close something like a setting of your registered china. Now a days those wedding gifts are only for shower gifts and only cash is to be given as a wedding gift. How sad for the brides - I still really treasure the beautiful sterling and crystal dishes and vases I was given as a wedding gift. It's a shame young brides don't get the beautiful lifetime treasures we got.