Community Chat

[CrazyKittyLvr2]

Our daughter moved back home to help when husband went thru cancer treatments and surgery. Our son has his own home 4 miles from us.  I have friends here but i'm not close to his family.  It's not that I don't like them as I said we have nothing in common. I'm tired of traveling 20 milles round trip for a prescription, go to the movies or just to get groceries. I want convenience in my old age. I'm not one who thinks closing in on 70 is young. As I said earlier it's my issue not his. 

[CrazyKittyLvr2]

@Kardi Lol.  I came close a couple of times.  I wouldn't look good in an orange prison jumpsuit.  My Mother-in-law had several daughters-in-law and if she was annoyed with you she complained to all the  others but didn't say boo to you about it.  She passed away decades ago.  One brother lives to gossip. The rest are okay.  I stay away from the one that is nosey.  

[Karie2022]

Thats a tough one, never been in that predicament as both hubby and i crave new environments and move fairly often....our next move will be when the kids are done with school, cant wait!  sometimes the grass isnt always greener; maybe living near sis wouldnt be what you thought...it would seem after 50 years of living in one place, you would've planted your roots and been fairly content, im sorry for you that isnt the case.  to be honest, i do think your hubby is a bit selfish, but quite frankly most of them are. i wish i had some good advice for you...i hope you find some peace and are able to work things out.

[drizzellla]

Just a thought - please check out the house you would like to move into.

A friend was all set to move into a house right behind his house. He had it all planned. Then they looked at the house a second time with out furniture. And decided against buying it. They was too many things that had to be fixed and repaired. He said it would take years and too much $$$$. He was heartbroken. They had big plans for the house.

So before you get your heart set on buying the house. Please check it out and see if it fits your needs.

Good Luck

[luvmybeetle]

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@SahmIam wrote:

@CrazyKittyLvr2  I would move. And I would do so with or without him. But that's ME. 

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I agree with @SahmIam.  I've had to move to 2 different towns because my husband was transferred.  I have lived here for 34 years and I've never liked it very much. I was never treated well by his mother and don't have family here and am tired of doing everything my husband wants.  I would move in an instant if I could. That's me also. 

[occasionalrain]

@Tyak I wouldn't have remained married to a man for 50 years who cared so little about my happieness. 

[esmerelda]

@CrazyKittyLvr2 You’re retired. Make the four-hour drive to see your sister etc. when you want to see them. Stay as long as she’ll have you. It’s easier...and kinder to your husband...than moving. 

ETA...or just leave, since you “have nothing in common.”  Would he notice?

[RainCityWoman]

Just my opinion, but since your husband has had it his way all these years, and he has never been away from his family, is it within his realm of understanding to allow YOU to be close to YOUR family for a change and be in a place you love??? Seems as if there is no give and take here, or am I just naive?

[CrazyKittyLvr2]

It's not that he doesn't care about my happiness.  He's the practical one. And he grew up having to drive miles for everything so he thinks nothing of it. I had a job I really liked, I have friends here. My kids were born hereI have roots. I have never liked the inconvenience of living in the country. I always yipped about the everyday travel issue. I know his objections are valid. My sister's health is not good and if we pick up and move and God forbid something happens to her we are down there and the kids are here. His cancer drs. are up here and it would be more travel to keep them and come back for appointments plus he likes them. I know people there outside of my sister he doesn't know anybody. This has bothered me more since I retired.

[Sweet_Serenity]

Speaking of relationships people stay together for decades until one day reality of mortality and years spent with this person is their wake-up call to move on.