B. Smith passed - Page 3

Nuttmeg · ‎03-09-2010

This family had enough money to hire someone to care for B. This is low class.

SandySparkles · ‎06-13-2010

@BlueFinch wrote:
She was such a beautiful lady with a wonderful life, until robbed by this horrible disease.

I lost my mom in 2017, after a ten year downward spiral with Alzheimer's. I managed her care with a 24 hr/day sitter for safety. This allowed me to keep her out of a nursing home, as promised at the onset of her diagnosis. But, I fear it's taken years off my own life.

I learned that the most important thing for the loved one, or caregiver is support, wherever they can find it. That's if they want to keep their own mind and health. I'm glad the husband had someone else by his side to help him navigate the journey. It was, in no way, a betrayal. It becomes survival.

@BlueFinch Well said! May others be inspired by your thoughtful post. I think the role of caregivers, and the mental and physical fatigue THEY endure as well, is sometimes under-recognized. They are deserving of the highest praise and emotional support! It is comforting to know that she was so LOVED, and was blessed enough to have had that level of dedicated support.

~~~All we need is LOVE💖

liliblu · ‎09-06-2011

@bikerbabe wrote:
I had a feeling the whole mistress situation would be mentioned. I’m not going to judge, especially since the family appeared ok with it. The woman he knew as his wife was long gone and he was overwhelmed trying to take care of her. The woman who became his girlfriend started out as a platonic relationship. She moved in and helped care for B. No judgement from me. He was very upfront with the kids and from what I’ve heard the only judgement has come from outsiders who don’t even know the parties involved.

I'm not judging him because he had girlfriend. I'm judging him for bringing her into the home. B. Smith did not have children. So there really wasn't anyone to complain when he brought the girlfriend into their house. His daughter loved B. but she wasn't going to oppose her father.

liliblu · ‎09-06-2011

@Nuttmeg wrote:
@bikerbabe
This family had enough money to hire someone to care for B. This is low class.

She had round the clock care. This wasn't a spouse without resources who needed an extra set of hands to help with her care or the housework. The girlfriend was/ is there for him. I don't think he's awful because he found someone new. She could be there for him without ever stepping foot into the home he shared with his wife. I find it disrespectful.

MLM21 · ‎04-02-2018

@bikerbabe wrote:
I had a feeling the whole mistress situation would be mentioned. I’m not going to judge, especially since the family appeared ok with it. The woman he knew as his wife was long gone and he was overwhelmed trying to take care of her. The woman who became his girlfriend started out as a platonic relationship. She moved in and helped care for B. No judgement from me. He was very upfront with the kids and from what I’ve heard the only judgement has come from outsiders who don’t even know the parties involved.

It happens more than you think. I know a few people that are in this situation and have had girlfriends or boyfriends. About 10/12 years ago give or take, CBS Sunday Morning had a segment on this very topic.

One of my ex-co-workers (who has since passed). His daughter was the main caregiver to his wife. He was very honest about dating. While he never took any of his dates home. He never hid the fact was still married.

My grandfather (fathers, father) had a violent form of Alzheimer's. He would hit the staff and my grandmother at the assisted living place he was before we had to move him to an assisted living place that could handle his type of situation. He did not know who anyone was, Inc. my grandmother. When he died it was a relief. He was a shell of his former happy go lucky self that was the sweetest, kindest person you'd want to meet. Very horrible disease (along with any form of dementia).

So for people who have never had to deal with it. Please don't judge her husband.

CANDLEQUEEN · ‎03-09-2010

I am so saddened by this news....What a gracious, talented lady. I just keep remembering that movie, Still Alice. It was just such a good movie about Alzheimers, especially early on-set.....RIP B. Smith