Community Chat

[Auntie CC]

Nope. Give this funeral a pass since his relatives will be uncomfortable

[faeriemoon]

I don't think she should go.  If the ex husband's family has gotten wind of the idea she is planning to go, they may have instructed the funeral home to not grant her access.  

I just think it's awkward all around.  She can go to the cemetery at a later date if she wants.

[Financialgrl]

Funerals are hard enough - she had no kids with him and her presence will anger the family.  She can visit his gravesite a few days later.

[50Mickey]

@Desertdi   The OP said there were no children. I think it's strange that she wants to go to a funeral where she is probably not wanted. And it is also strange that she is trying to find a friend to go with her. If she needs closure she can go to the grave site after the funeral is over.  If I had to guess why she is thinking about attending the funeral it is to show that family and girlfriend that she was the wife. Funerals are not a good time to make a statement. 

[reiki604]

If she wants to cause more discomfort, sorrow and pain to an already grieving family, then she should definitely go. If she wants to behave like a decent human being, she should stay home.

[tiny 2]

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@lovesrecess wrote:

My sister just found out her ex has passed away. The funeral is in three days and it is in the same town where she lives. She wants to attend the funeral....but his family has been hostile towards her since the divorce 14 yrs ago. It was not an amicable divorce. He was cheating on her and was still living with the woman when he died. No children that she knows of but not sure. My sister had no children with her ex. I cannot attend the funeral with her due to some adjunct work I am doing, so she would have to go alone.  Do you think she should go? She has asked a couple of friends and so far, no takers. I can't figure out why she would even want to go, knowing how his family has treated her over the years.

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@lovesrecess, After 14 years, hostile divorce and family, if closure is needed then she needs a therapist not a funeral.

[pigletsmom]

Since no one likely wants her there and they've been on bad terms all this time it sounds to me like she wants to go to make a not very nice point. Probably one last dig at the new wife. A funeral isn't the place to bring drama. 

[kelsey17]

No...she def shouldn't go.....maybe in a week or two she could go to the cemetary and say a prayer at his buriel site....

[Iwantcoffee]

No.

[Desertdi]

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@kelsey17 wrote:

No...she def shouldn't go.....maybe in a week or two she could go to the cemetary and say a prayer at his buriel site....

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@kelsey17   Guess I missed the part about "no children."    Now, if were ME, I'd wear a wig and dark glasses and go just to make SURE the #$% was really gone for good................