Reply
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,644
Registered: ‎03-29-2019

At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

Today, as I was driving home, I had the radio on, and "Hotel California" came on.

 

I was instantly taken back to when I had heard that song playing on the radio in March of this year.

 

I had traveled to visit my dad at the nursing home that he was in (it was the first place that would take him), and it was lunch time.

 

I sat with my dad as he nibbled on his food, and this song came on.

 

It was the last time that we had lunch together.

 

 

He died five days later.

 

 

The first time I heard it after he passed, I was sobbing, today, I felt sad, bt no tears.

 

 

I guess that means that I'm healing.

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,975
Registered: ‎05-23-2015

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

I totally understand, my mom loved opera, but her favorite pop song was “ Moon River “, and when I hear it I just sob. Music does it like nothing else.

" You are entitled to your opinion. But you are not entitled to your own facts."
Daniel Patrick Moynihan
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,454
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

I totally get it. 

The first time I heard "Tears in Heaven" by Eric Clapton I was post-partum coming home from aerobics. I was sobbing by the time I got out of the car. It freaked out DH.  I still have a hard time when it comes on.

Regular Contributor
Posts: 157
Registered: ‎03-14-2011

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

Can't imagine anything more precious.  You were there and that was so special.  It is good to recall and realize how much it meant.

Highlighted
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,060
Registered: ‎03-15-2010

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

@Anonymous032819 

 

It does get easier, but never goes away.

 

I remember waving to my dad as he went into surgery.

 

That was my last contact with him.

 

I can think about it now, many years later, and not cry immediately.  But I still cry.

 

You just learn to live with the happier memories, or try to, anyway.

Super Contributor
Posts: 281
Registered: ‎07-18-2018

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

@Anonymous032819:

 

A girl is never too old to be a daddy's girl. My dad was blind for several years before he passed and had to be placed in nursing home. After his passing, every time I heard the song "I can only imagine, what my eyes will see"....I would fall in a sobbing heap. You have a wonderful memory to hold in your heart. Just know that everytime you hear that song and sing it, he is singing with you.

Sending you friendship and (((HUGS)))

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,513
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

It's funny how a song or movie can conjure up certain memories, some good, some bad.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 893
Registered: ‎03-19-2016

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

  We would go to 4th of July fireworks  and they would play the 1812 Overture. They shot real canons.

  He had a record and the speakers were in the living room under my bed. He would play it Sunday mornings and it would wake me up. He would really laugh. 

   When I watch fireworks and it’s played I think of Papa and smile!

 

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,298
Registered: ‎07-01-2012

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

My heart weeps for you.

 

Sobbing, no tears, doesn't necessarily mean you are healing, it means you LOVE, and this love will ever be within your heart and soul.

 

Healing is a word I can not relate to, acceptance is one that I can.

I have learnt to accept a loss but no, my heart has never healed.

 

Some do say it becomes easier over time.  There is nothing strange about crying when you remember things and that can happen anywhere.  Love does hurt. Memories are the shadows that stay with us.

 

I am not ashamed to admit I weep concerning my losses.  I have even telephoned someone who is no longer alive during a moment I needed a hug and then realized what I had done.

 

You have had a gift, a beautiful love between father and daughter.  You will smile, you will laugh, and you will weep. 

 

Today was difficult.  This memory made you sob, tomorrow's may have you laughing. 

 

You feel and always will love him, and that is what it means to be human.

 

Be gentle with yourself, you are doing the best you can.

 

 

Contributor
Posts: 53
Registered: ‎11-23-2010

Re: At Least I Didn't Burst In To Tears

Thank you so much for sharing that sweet precious moment with us. God always has a plan. That day you and your dad shared something that no one can take away from you. I know there are others out there that have gone through similar moments..treasure them..think of them and most of all pray for therm. God Bless and Take Care