Community Chat

[ann1989]

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@suzyQ3 wrote:

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@ann1989 wrote:

I am an approachable friendly woman but if you ask me if I know who is hiring my demeanor quickly changes.  I'm not an employment agency and I wish people would stop asking me where to go and what to do to break into x y or z line of work.  Everyone tells me it's because I look the part but inevitably the conversation gets too intrusive and they want to know what I do for a living and then how can they do the same. Women younger than me, women the same age as me approach me with these questions needy and hungry to get their lives on track and yes I feel for them but I cannot help someone just because my face looks like I can. I tell people to apply for jobs online at venues they're interested in.  That's how it's done nowadays and people don't necessarily have an inside track.  Inside tracks are not even looked upon favorably by most big companies anyway. If you have good references and experience, you should be okay.  Why do people think that complete strangers can get them a job?  No, I'm not in NY but another large metropolitan city.

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@ann1989, what?????????

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@suzyQ3a person who is unfriendly whether it's in NY or any other place is sometimes based on what other people want from you. 

[Puppy Lips]

It has been awhile since I have been to NYC, but I am going again in the spring. Frankly, I do think people that work there come off as a bit rude. But I don’t let it bother me as it seems that is the way many of them are. Being from the Midwest, the New York accent and that of New Jersey, well, I find it annoying. Nothing they can do about it though. They probably don’t like the way I talk either.

[this is my nic]

@Jordan2 

During my visits to NYC I am always pleased with the way native New Yorkers treat visitors like me!   I've been in the city a couple weeks before Christmas and never thought I was treated rudely, just the opposite.  

[Mersha]

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@Havarti wrote:

No!  I think "unfriendly" is the wrong word.  I think there are sometimes regional or cultural differences that strike people differently.  My experience is that people from NY, NJ and that general area tend to be more direct, some may say blunt, but not unfriendly.  They will tell you honestly like it is, no fluff - just truth from their perspective.  Some people are not used to this type of approach and so it seems unfriendly, when actually that is a characteristic most seek in a true friend.  

We live in an area were people talk about how "nice" the people here are - yet, when new people move here the most common complaint is that it is hard to make friends with the locals - that we are nice, yet cold.  They say the locals already have their circle of friends and it is hard to break through.  Hardly how you think "nice" people would be.  

In neither case do I think the people of those areas are unfriendly, unkind, or rude.  I think it illustrates the wide variety of people and styles than make up this world.  When you find it to be typical of an area, it is often linked to how we were raised.  Many years ago the world was not as cosmopolitan as it is now, so areas tended to be comprised of "like" people - people with similar cultural and/or religious backgrounds.  And each brought their own styles & characteristics, etc. - which all accepted as the norm.  Now that the world is getting more balanced in a mix of backgrounds, we find that some differences in style are open to misinterpretation.  We tend to judge from what we know.  Differences help us learn & grow.  

I have wonderful friends from NY and have never felt New Yorkers were unfriendly.

Hope this did not offend anyone - that was not my intent.

@Havarti   Excellent observations!

When I first moved to the NY City area, it took me awhile to settle in.  I recall talking to a neighbor on the phone and was taken aback when she said "I am done talking to you" and hung up.  It is a fast paced type of lifestyle.  Eventually, after being there for so long, I became the same way.

When we relocated to the DC area, it was a totally different vibe.  At this point, NY will always be a part of me.

As far as rude or unfriendly, you will find that in all corners of the country from the largest cities to the smallest towns.

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[shoekitty]

I just got back from my first trip to New York.  What a place,  the people were fun, nice and helpful.  I was in Manhattan and went all over New York City.  I have to back .  In 4 days I saw hardly half of what I hoped.  It's kind of like Los Angeles as far as getting around.  But traffic is so much better than LA.    It's getting around the city in a cab, takes time. Beautiful place, I took my granddaughters and they fell in love with it too.  I have to go back in better weather.  It snowed and rained.

its a good thing I am from the Bay Area in California, and travel to Los Angeles a lot or I might say it is expensive, lol.  We had the best pizza, Italian food, and the tea at Alices Tea room was just as good as the reviews.  Someone here recommended it.  
I hit Magnolia Bakery and secreted a large carton of Banana Pudding away.

[evelyner]

I lived in  New York years ago, and I found New Yorkers very friendly,  If I was lost in the subway, there was always someone there to help,  I have lived in Los Angeles most of my life now, and I think Los Angelenos are not that friendly.

[dulwich]

@jonbon  sorry to disappoint you but I have never been rude or unkind to anyone -  just had to find out some people ask for opinions but really only want the answer they want to hear at that moment - this is where you have to be tactful and kind.  

In regard to the ‘kindness’ on these boards there are indeed some lovely posters but I have also read some really unkind ‘honest’ opinions too. 

[Lindsays Grandma]

I didn't read any of the posts after I saw the title of the Thread.  I am a native New Yorker, born, raised in Richmond Hill, Queens, summer house on Long Island.  I don't know where and why that rumor ever started but I can attest to the fact that we New Yorkers are friendly.  It is quite possible that the way some people talk gives the feeling they aren't friendly, kind of a gruff voice but "WE LOVE EVERYBODY."

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@dulwich wrote:

@Jordan2  Love New Yorkers.  I worked for a year there and loved the honesty - you ask an opinion and you get a real answer - reminded me of Londoners.  People I worked were very friendly loved every day I lived there.

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@dulwich ...I'm a New York native and I loved those engineers from England that I worked with on Long Island, always a fan of the English, and that dry sense of humor.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@dulwich wrote:

@Jordan2  P.S to my earlier thread - how could I forget - love, love, love the accent.  I have a strong London accent but if I had to change a N.Y. accent every time!

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@dulwich ...I am laughing because when I moved from New York to CA I worked my butt off to get rid of my New York accent.  After 54 years lots of people still pick up on that accent but not as much.  I remember one day making a phone call to New York when we still had to go through a telephone operator and oh my lord, after listening to her I prayed I didn't sound like that...talk about a heavy NY accent.