Community Chat

[gertrudecloset]

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@Lucky Charm wrote:

I think that all you're doing is unloading things that she may turn around and *fulfill* again.  Is she still purchasing unneccessary items?

If you're donating, she could probably use the tax break, unless she has enough wealth to sustain her spending habits.

Hoarding, it seems, needs to be addressed professionally for a successful outcome.

Or you will continue a cycle that doesn't help her in the long run.

Have you ever had the conversation that she has a problem?  

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This too!

[gertrudecloset]

@GlittergalI think she is giving them to her sister because there are times she feels shame.  Feeling shame about her predictament is what will get her out of this.  Many hoarders don't feel any compunction to "share" a thing with anyone.  The fact that she at least gives this stuff to her sister tells me she's feeling some sort of shame.  Just my opinion....nothing scientific.

[occasionalrain]

If the sister wanted to donate, she would have told that to the OP. 

She is willing to give the clothing to her sister. No one knows how she would feel about giving them to strangers. To assume she can be manipulated with cozy talk to modify her decision may alienate her. 

[northiie57]

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@mom2four0418 wrote:

Hopefully, your sister is under the care of a mental health professional.  

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she says she is but never follows through with appointments

[northiie57]

first I want to thank you all for your suggestions.  For some reason I am the only family member or friend that she has had some progress with.  A lot have given up on her, but not me, I never ever give up.  I will continue to do whatever I can to get her happy back

[gertrudecloset]

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@northiie57 wrote:

first I want to thank you all for your suggestions.  For some reason I am the only family member or friend that she has had some progress with.  A lot have given up on her, but not me, I never ever give up.  I will continue to do whatever I can to get her happy back

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Good luck to you @northiie57 .  You are a good sister!

[Sooner]

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@northiie57 wrote:

first I want to thank you all for your suggestions.  For some reason I am the only family member or friend that she has had some progress with.  A lot have given up on her, but not me, I never ever give up.  I will continue to do whatever I can to get her happy back

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@northiie57 At the same time, your obligations and efforts can only go so far.  None of us are museums, and none of us can store more than we are comfortable living with or should we.

Best wishes!  And don't forget you have a life and rights too.  Sometimes it is easy to forget that--it took me a long time to realize that.