Am I being too sensitive? - Page 9

wildcherry · ‎03-09-2010

Wow, 40 years of this? I don't know what is going to change now. To answer your question, you are not being too sensitive. Good luck.

LucyGoose · ‎04-20-2012

On 3/13/2015 KittyLouSoutenu said:
Does absence make the heart grow fonder?

No. Absence makes the mind wander.

KittyLouSoutenu · ‎02-15-2015

On 3/13/2015 LucyGoose said:
On 3/13/2015 KittyLouSoutenu said:
Does absence make the heart grow fonder?

No. Absence makes the mind wander.

Haha!

KittyLouSoutenu · ‎02-15-2015

On 3/13/2015 Alley Catvocate said:
He is a man... They do not think as deeply as we do..

Since he has always been ME ME without you speaking up, he felt there was nothing wrong...

On a lighter note,Kittylou,ITA! ${#emotions_dlg.devil2}$

HIGH PAW!

Mominohio · ‎08-08-2010

If, after all these years he is the same, I'd say you are starting to ( or always have been, just hid it or ignored it) get insecure in the relationship some. Perhaps when younger, you were too busy to be as bothered by his attitude and behavior in this area.

From my perspective, the men who have a 'me' streak, don't get much better as they age. I hope you can learn to let it go, because it is unlikely he will change at this late date.

Stella Dallas · ‎01-13-2015

On 3/12/2015 ditzy dori said: We own a condo in Florida, which we just bought about 6 months ago. I am retiring in 3 months and then I'm free to go down. In the meantime, my husband, who is already retired, just left today to go down and enjoy. I, however, had to stay home to go to work. I will meet him down there the Easter week. I would not have told him not to go. the fact that he wanted to go and did not care that I had to stay behind to work didn't bother him in the least, and that fact was enough to hurt me deeply. So I would have not "forced" him to stay until I could go. Hubby always was a "me me" person and I have gone along with that for 40 years. Now in my 60s it bothers me. What do you think? Am I being too sensitive or should I just s**k it up? (we will come back together after Easter.)

Since you asked, you ARE being too sensitive.

BTW, since he's always been a "me me person", why would you be hurt, surprised, etc.? He's just staying true to form. And after 40 years, it's ok to take a break and be on your own, to rest and decompress, for a while. You may feel the same way after you retire.

Danky · ‎08-04-2013

On 3/13/2015 LucyGoose said:
On 3/13/2015 KittyLouSoutenu said:
Does absence make the heart grow fonder?

No. Absence makes the mind wander.

Or-----Absence makes the heart grow fonder....for somebody else !

Stella Dallas · ‎01-13-2015

On 3/13/2015 Alley Catvocate said:
He is a man... They do not think as deeply as we do..

I really hate stereotypes like this. Replace "man" with "woman" or "African-American" or any other noun, and you can see how offensive this is.

Stella Dallas · ‎01-13-2015

On 3/13/2015 KittyLouSoutenu said:
Agree that 3 weeks is a lot different from 3 months.

But either way it seems OP has an issue with it that she might need to resolve since she says her feelings are hurt.

Doesn't help to just tell someone, "Oh, don't feel what you feel"

Except that she ASKED for opinions. They aren't always what you want to hear, especially on the internet.

LucyGoose · ‎04-20-2012

Maybe she wants him, to want her. Yes, that would hurt my feelings if my husband just went on down to Florida and didn't even act like he cared that he was not going to see me for three weeks or whatever. Just "okay, bye" and left.

I'd make sure he knew it, too. Before he left I'd go right up to him and say, "What do you mean saying 'Well I'm off to Florida to start my retirement. See you in three weeks!'? You're not even going to miss me? You don't wish I could come along with you? Well that hurts my feelings. I feel very unattractive now. I feel like you don't even want me anymore." Then I'd see what he said.

Then I'd say to him, "When I get down there, I want you to make it special for me. Have flowers for me or something, plan a romantic time and show me that you missed me." (But then I'd be resentful because I had to tell him to do it). But that's the way men are. You have to tell them what you want.