Community Chat

[ShowMe]

I have had my papers drawn up for a long time now. And the proper persons each have a copy of it, including my attorney. So, any time that my time comes to go "home" I hope and pray that my directives are followed. It is my life and my ending......Amen......

[jlkz]

As an attorney, when my DH meets with clients to do their wills, he has to remind them that it is not IF but WHEN you die. Subtle distinction.

[jlkz]

As for wills, we didn't do ours until we went to Europe. Guess it's a case of shoemaker's children being the last to get shoes!!! LOL

[Cats3000]

For a while, I was a volunteer at a local medical center. I helped patients and families by explaining what Advance Directives were, why they were necessary and I then helped them complete the forms and the process of getting them onto their patient records.

For some, the process was an emotional experience. They were contemplating their mortality and how they wanted treatment if they could no longer assist. For others, you could see the sigh of relief as they went through the documents, completed them and found out how to use them.

For me, the most taxing part of the work came when I had to help people complete their Advance Directives when a surgical procedure was imminent (as within the next few minutes). I had to do in a short period of time what should have been done long before hand.

The proper time to fill out your Advance Directives is when you're feeling great and don't expect to need the documents. You can take the time to know what you what for your care and treatment, discuss your plan with your Health Care Agent, and do it without the pressure of something imminent happening.

You should review your Advance Directives periodically to make sure that what you wanted when you filled them out is what you want today and that the person you selected as your Health Care Agent is still the person of your choice.

[Cats3000]

On 4/27/2014 PinkSugar said:

I have an Advance Directive with a copy on my refrigerator as I live alone. My family all know my wishes as far as medical & funeral decisions anyway.

"Knowing your wishes" is good, but it's really not enough. Your Health Care Agent (the person who'll speak for you if you can't speak for yourself) should have a copy of your Advance Directive in his/her possession. A copy should also be on file with your doctor and the hospital where you've had or will have care. These documents are important should a health emergency arise.

[Cats3000]

On 4/27/2014 game-on said:

I used to work in a hospital as a social worker; the hardest thing to watch is family members arguing while their loved one is dying. There are so many feelings that come out during this time.... that is why it is so much better to have the advanced directive and to give copies to family members. If a family member doesn't agree, or doesn't feel that they can honor this, then that family member should NOT be there. It is difficult enough for people to be there... let alone for the energy expended to argue.

More than giving copies to family members, the chosen Health Care Agent is the one who speaks for the patient. Before a Health Care Agent is chosen, the person completing the Advance Directive must remind everyone that what is on the document is that person's choice for care and treatment and that it must be respected. That is why Advance Directives should be completed before the emergency occurs. As an Advance Directives Volunteer at a local medical center, I stressed the importance of selecting one person as the Health Care Agent and selecting an alternate if the original agent was unable to do the job.

[Cats3000]

On 4/27/2014 glb613 said:

Some people act like if you fill out the forms it will cause your demise.

Filling out the forms is a process in which you, maybe for the first time, contemplate your mortality. It can often be a very emotional experience for some. For others it can be a breath of relief that another part of life has been taken care of.