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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,523
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

ANONYMOUS MARRIAGE ONE-LINERS & SHORT QUOTES

1.   At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong hand and finger?"  The other woman replied, "Yes, I am, I'm married to the wrong man."

 

2.   After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."

 

3.   A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds;  'Wife wanted'...Next day he received a hundred letters.  They all said the same thing, "You can have mine."

 

4.   When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

 

5.   Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.  Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

 

6.   I married Miss Riley.  I just didn't know her first name was Always.  Losing a wife can be hard.  In my case almost impossible.

 

7.   I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't like to interrupt her.

 

8.   Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

 

9.   My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.  So I got two girlfriends.

 

10.   A husband said to his wife, "No, I don't hate your relatives.  In fact, I like your mother-in-law better than I like mine.  (get it?)

 

11.   How do most men define marriage?  A very expensive way to get your laundry done free.

 

12.   A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife was.

 

13.   The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget one once.

 

                               SHORT QUOTES

 

14.   A winner never stops trying.

 

15.   No trust, no relationship.

 

16.   Turn haters into motivators

 

17.   Life is a challenge, meet it.

 

18.   Worry ends when faith begins.

 

19.   Never stress over what you can't control.

 

20.   Life is too short to take everything so seriously.

 

21.   Smiling is the best way to face every problem.

 

22.   Before you react, think.  Before you quit, try.

 

23.   Cheating isn't an accident, it's a choice.

 

24.   Be the first to forgive, just never forget.

 

25.   Don't wait for it to happen, make it happen.

 

 

 

 

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,287
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: ANONYMOUS MARRIAGE ONE-LINERS & SHORT QUOTES

@Lindsays Grandma     I had a "bad day".........and I really NEEDED those "Short Quotes"  !!!!!     di

♥Surface of the Sun♥
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,523
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: ANONYMOUS MARRIAGE ONE-LINERS & SHORT QUOTES

@Desertdi   Sorry you had a bad day, don't let it take you down.  Kick it, yeah, I know it's easier said than done but we have all been there lots of times and we know it gets better.

 Take care of yourself, remember the saying  This Too Shall Pass..  Heart

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam