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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,609
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag


@HisElk1 wrote:

@KatieB wrote:

@PilatesLover Why would  you want to dispose of it?   I still have the flag from my Dad's funeral over 25 years ago.  It is proudly displayed in a flag case on a bookshelf.

 


@KatieB , same here.  It's displayed on the top of our dining room hutch.  It really doesn't take up that much space.


@HisElk1   That's a good idea.  I may move mine to the top of the china cabinet.

Respected Contributor
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Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

[ Edited ]

@CelticCrafter wrote:

@KatieB wrote:

@PilatesLover Why would  you want to dispose of it to begin with?   I still have the flag from my Dad's funeral over 25 years ago.  It is proudly displayed in a flag case on a bookshelf.

 

 


The original poster didn't say if she had children or not so isn't it better that she decide now what to do with the flag?

Why do people, in general (not just you) feel they need to guilt someone into keeping something they don't want because of painful memories.


@CelticCrafter   I didn't know I was 'guilting' anyone.  Looks like you're trying to 'guilt' me.  FYI, I don't have kids or living siblings.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,054
Registered: ‎05-01-2020

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

Haven't read the replies so this may be a repeat.

 

Take a picture of the RN diploma and put it on one of the genealogy sites. That would tell her story and honor that accomplishment.

 

I'd keep the flag and use it in my Memorial Day/Flag Day/Independence Day decor. This way it's not out all the time but still has a use.

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Posts: 32,482
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag


@chessylady wrote:

My brother who was in the Army has the flag from my Dad's funeral. I expect he will pass it on to his daughter. I think it is sad that people do not care about significant parts of their ancestors' lives.


@chessylady I care about my ancestors but I can't store their left behind things for the rest of my life, nor can future generations.  The "things" are not the memories.  And I think you are wrong in thinking that getting rid of things means people do not care.  

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Posts: 2,206
Registered: ‎09-18-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

I was very proud of my father's WWII service.  He passed in 1969 and when my mother passed, I became the keeper of the flame.  The day after 9/11, I chose to fly my father's flag in honor of him and all those lost on 9/11.  I flew it proudly until it disintegrated and have never, ever regretted the decision I made.  It was what my father would have done.

 

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Posts: 12,313
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

I have my dad's flag.  I keep it on top of a cabinet.  I don't know what will happen with it when I am gone.  

Most people in your family will know who the flag is for but I did cut out an obit and taped it to the back of dad's display...just in case someone in the family needs reminded.

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Posts: 19,486
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

@PilatesLover 

 

Thank you for bringing up this subject.  

 

I had forgotten until I read it that I have a commemorative U.S. flag given to us by a dear friend years ago that was a fighter pilot in the Air Force.  I also have a souvenir piece of the barbed wire fence at the DMZ in Korea that he gave us.

 

I'm going to have to think about donating it/them or make arrangements for them in my will.  Something I had not considered before.

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Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

To the origial poster...if you have a lot of items that you no longer want...can you take good photos, print them out and make an  collage and put behind glass...

 

or cut out from the originals the pretty writing, names, dates and make a collage and then frame that?  

 

I have a letter my dad wrote to me, I do not want anyone else finding or reading that letter, but I did cut out his original handwriting..his name, and other sentimental words that he wrote...I put those behind glass in a small frame.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 747
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

@PilatesLover - my neighbor and I recently had this discussion.  We think it is possible to have the flag cremated with the person.  In this case, our mothers each have military flags from our fathers.  My dad was KIA in 1967 and his flag has been in a soft plastic storage case they gave my mom after the funeral.  It has lived in a dresser drawer for the past 55 years.  No one in my family wants it.  The flag is burned in a respectful manner.  Might be worth talking to the people who do the funeral arrangements.  The VFW is probably another good option.  It is hard to part with some things but not good when they become a burden.

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Re: A dilemma - my father's funeral flag

[ Edited ]

@hopi wrote:

@Cakers3 wrote:

@hopi wrote:

Give it to Goodwill or donate it to a Church sale.


@hopi   No.


There are plenty of WW 11 colectors, flag collectors , 40's items, etc.

It would be nice to let the memory be shared.

Burning it does not make it any less harmed.


@hopi   Again NO in case you didn't understand the meaning of the word.

 

You do realize Goodwill just sends clothing/fabrics overseas to be reused.

 

Setting out a flag to be purchased?  You are assuming somebody from the military or a collector would buy the flag and use it in a respectful manner.

 

I would be horrified to find out the flag was purchased to be cut up to make clothing by some clueless idiot. 

 

Besides, this is not an antique flag. Collectors are not looking for current flags; the flag here in question would have 50 stars if it was given for the funeral.

 

The "memory" belongs to the family.

 

The VFW etc. is the correct and proper way; also the collection boxes.

 

There is a reason why the flag is disposed by burning.

 

The topic is the flag, not all sorts of memorabilia.

 

 

"" Compassion is a verb."-Thich Nhat Hanh