Community Chat

[deepwaterdotter]

My friend mentioned that her daughter prefers to text instead of call her. She told her daughter that she would like to have more actual vocal conversations. Her daughter replied that she feels that texting gets to the point of the communication faster. My friend said she misses hearing her daughter's voice. My friend views this as her daughter desiring to control the flow of communication. Never having met her daughter, she lives many states away, I don't know if she has control issues where her mother is concerned. I don't own a cellphone, so I have no experience with texting or the reasons it might be a preferred mode of communication.

So my question is: Is a person who prefers texting over an actual vocal conversation trying to "control" the flow of a conversation?

[pinkskates4]

Maybe it's controlling the flow, but have you ever tried getting off the phone with someone who would not stop talking - or who did not care that they were interrupting you? That's controlling too - and maybe what the daughter is reacting against.

[Feline Fine]

That "controlling" is a possibility.

The person also may be a 'my way or the highway' -type. Or, both mom and daughter could have control issues.

Maybe a nice compromise would be e-mailing, with their preferences of texting and phone call contact just an every now and then thing.

I would think that the mom would be happy that they still connect in the first place.

[straykatz]

My DD prefers texting too.....I don't think it is a way to control the flow of conversation...sometimes it's just a quick message or question.....when it's more than that then we talk but for quick little things she finds it easier than calling.

[DoneTryin]

It sounds like it to me. Texting is fine for short, to the point conversations, such as "meet me at Joe's at 8 tonight" but a main component of communication is missing from texting/emailing - tone of voice. That's something that's seen over & over again in these forums, when a poster writes something that's misinterpreted by some readers.

[deepwaterdotter]

You make some sensible points. I find my friend to be a courteous conversationalist, but I'm sure our chats are less intimate than those she would have with a family member. I do think she misses hearing her daughter's voice as often as she wishes. Maybe it is harder for her to handle the physical distance between she and her daughter.

[esmerelda]

I don't know about flow or control. Let the daughter text, the mom can call.

[RibbonsRosesRainbows]

I don't know about control but it seems they don't want to talk much since they are texting.

[brii]

I don't have texting conversations with my kids. It's just short messages.

[ID2]

I have two grown sons. Men don't seem to want to talk much so I find texting with them is a great alternative! I hear from them a lot more than just waiting for them to call me.