Reply
Super Contributor
Posts: 750
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

On 2/27/2015 mominohio said:
On 2/27/2015 Cats3000 said:
On 2/27/2015 mominohio said:

I just actually just now went and watched the video of this (rather than just reading the written words), and how anyone could ever question or criticize the wording of this, when seen 'live' is beyond me. That is the problem with the written word. You can never capture the true emotion with which something is said. You never get the true context.

The man was tearful, and trembling, having trouble getting the words out. It was beautiful. If you can see this, and still use words like controlling, you have deep seated issues.

I'm not criticizing the written words. I'm NOT criticizing the spoken word, although I believe that talk is cheap especially in an emotional moment. I AM criticizing the ease and simplicity of the "no fault divorce". I AM criticizing 2nd marriages which are more likely to end in divorce than are first marriages. Are their reasons marriages should end? Absolutely. But, the vast majority of marriages end because one or both partners believe it's "time to move on to someone else", leaving behind bewildered children.

Cats3000, Sorry if you thought that post was directed at you. It wasn't at all, in fact, I totally agree with you on this subject and have stated so in a previous post.

This post was directed at a couple of other posters who chose the word controlling to describe his vow to have her pray.

Post #23 shows I was supporting your post, so sorry if you thought this more recent one was attacking you.

Oh good grief. This could very well stem from the little girl at some point in the past making a comment about always forgetting to pray before meals, or something along those lines, and he just repeated it as one of the "vows". Don't make a big deal about it; it is indicative of no character faults or traits of the step-dad-to-be.

Yesh.

Money doesn't talk; it swears. --Bob Dylan
Super Contributor
Posts: 286
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

Folks have to make a mountain out a mole hill. Ridiculous.

Super Contributor
Posts: 2,916
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

Could've, would've, should've, why didn't he, etc. etc. etc. are the issues of control, not what he said.

jmoymmv

Super Contributor
Posts: 1,057
Registered: ‎04-20-2012

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

Well, I didn't like the whole man saying wedding vows to his step-daughter thing. That was just weird to me. But it wasn't me so I didn't have anything to do with it.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,019
Registered: ‎08-08-2010

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

On 2/27/2015 NoelSeven said:
On 2/27/2015 mominohio said:
On 2/27/2015 Cats3000 said:
On 2/27/2015 mominohio said:

I just actually just now went and watched the video of this (rather than just reading the written words), and how anyone could ever question or criticize the wording of this, when seen 'live' is beyond me. That is the problem with the written word. You can never capture the true emotion with which something is said. You never get the true context.

The man was tearful, and trembling, having trouble getting the words out. It was beautiful. If you can see this, and still use words like controlling, you have deep seated issues.

I'm not criticizing the written words. I'm NOT criticizing the spoken word, although I believe that talk is cheap especially in an emotional moment. I AM criticizing the ease and simplicity of the "no fault divorce". I AM criticizing 2nd marriages which are more likely to end in divorce than are first marriages. Are their reasons marriages should end? Absolutely. But, the vast majority of marriages end because one or both partners believe it's "time to move on to someone else", leaving behind bewildered children.

Cats3000, Sorry if you thought that post was directed at you. It wasn't at all, in fact, I totally agree with you on this subject and have stated so in a previous post.

This post was directed at a couple of other posters who chose the word controlling to describe his vow to have her pray.

Post #23 shows I was supporting your post, so sorry if you thought this more recent one was attacking you.

Sorry, but that is not the truth. It was the wording to "make" make her pray that some of us found off-putting.

There are other ways to teach a child to pray, but you were not happy with that suggestion.

Words matter, have is not the same as make.

Have can mean 'make', as in I'll have my children pray before meals. If it is something you will 'have' done in your home, then it is the same thing as being made to do it.

look it up on dictionary.com and see definition number six

to cause to, as by command or invitation

So I guess that kind of shoots down you and knowing the meaning of words, now doesn't it?

And why don't you not worry so much about just 'how' people choose to teach their children to pray, and I don't have to be happy with any suggestion you offer up either.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,921
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: A Stepfather's Wedding Vows to His Stepdaughter

" . . . I vow to show you how a man should treat a woman in my relationship with your mother.

And above all else, I vow to protect you, care for you and love you forever.”


I don't know the circumstances of the mother's divorce, but this stepfather is almost putting himself on a much higher pedestal and hope he can live up to his vow to the little girl. (I mean what a slap in the face to the girl's father, if he was a good dad and a good husband.....)

And this guy is publically vowing to support this child forever.....