Community Chat

[SXMGirl]

It is interesting how a neighborhood, for the most part, can be in mourning.  Our dear neighbor, who was so vibrant, passed yesterday morning, so unexpectedly.  I just saw him two days ago and he was his usual self. 

I seem to be having difficulty as I saw him to be one of the most active and positive people who I have ever met.  He was always gardening or riding around the neighborhood on his bike, and no one ever passed him without kind words or a wave.  I feel like a part of me is lost.  Passing his home today and not seeing him working in the yard and waving to me just makes me so sad.  

[AuntG]

That is very sad. Makes one realize how fragile life is.

[Mominohio]

@SXMGirl

I am so very sorry for your loss. 

It is amazing how people that are 'just neighbors' can become so important in our lives and make such a positive and lasting impact. And it makes it much harder when they are lost to us so suddenly, and when they are such good and wonderful people. 

I totally understand the difficulty you are having with this, and I'm truly sorry you have to experience it. And I would offer up the idea that you shouldn't expect to get over this as quickly or completely as some other passings with people that would be in a similar place in your life. This particular person has made a lasting and positive impact on your life.

The very best you can do at this point, is to honor this wonderful person by trying to be more like him, and carry on his positive and loving spirit with those that you come into contact with each day. A great void is being felt in your neighborhood, and maybe you and others can now stand in and try to be to others, what he as been to you. 

Prayers for peace for both you and his loved ones.

[Drythe]

@SXMGirl

People become part of the fabric of our lives, their loss leaves a hole we try to eventually bridge.  I understand, it does hurt.

Hope you are soon able to celebrate his life, and be grateful for knowing him.  Maybe the neighborhood can get together and do something in his honor.

Peace to you and his family.

[Trix]

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@SXMGirl I can understand your sadness, and wish that more neighbors spread the kind of good feelings your departed neighbor did.  You mentioned he was frequently gardening.  I do hope that if someone in his household cannot take over care of his yard that the neighbors come together to maintain it for the remainder of the summer as a tribute to him.  

[DREAMON]

Losing a positive part of your neighborhood is so sad. I fully understand how you feel. It happens but it really does change things...unfortunately.

About 30 years ago 2 women that were young widows without children moved in to the cutest brick home in our neighborhood. They worked on that house night and day. The garden was gorgeous and it truly looked like a home taken from the pages of Country Living.

In the evening  they would sit on their porch (which was  decorated in wicker, candles, and plants) in 2 rockers and sip their Ice Tea. They said hello to everyone who walked by and every car got a wave. If you were taking a child for a walk they always said how sweet the baby was and talked to them. This was their life for about 29 years.

Last year I drove by and the 1 woman was sitting in the rocker talking to the other rocker but it was empty. I sat and cried in my car...I knew her friend had passed.

The house went up for sale shortly after. It still brings tears to my eyes when I think about it.

You will always have fond memories of your sweet neighbors good nature and thoughtfulness.

A good neighbor is a treasure.

[geezerette]

Your neighbor could have been my husband up until a few months ago.  My husband was that guy in our neighborhood who was the one everyone talked to, laughed with, got advice from.  He was, as you mention your neighbor was, always so vibrant and positive.  He also was an avid gardener and instead of bicycling, he walked for miles every day.

When my husband passed suddenly a few months ago, I knew he would be missed.  Not only by me, but by several close friends here.  What I didn’t know was just how many people, or how intensely, would feel his loss.  People I’ve never met.  Just this morning as I was on the road walking the dog, a man stopped and asked if my husband was okay because he hadn’t seen him out lately and the garden is now gone.  When I explained what happened, he was bereft.  He talked for several minutes about his various contacts with my husband over the years.  This guy was just a delivery man whose route brings him into our neighborhood.

I think those few people, such as your neighbor, that touch our lives like he did yours, give us a sense of security.  In this age of craziness and busyness, those special people give us a little bit of calm.  A sense that perhaps “all is right with the world” after all.  Anymore, we too often don't take the time to interact with those around us, to let them know, in even a small way, that they matter.

If your neighbor has family, do please let them know how he touched your life—even in small, seemingly insignificant ways—and how much you enjoyed his presence.  You, your neighbors and his family have my condolences.

[chrystaltree]

You are grieving.  That's understandable.  Our neighbors are part of the "tribe" or "family" so when we lose one, we feel the loss and there is naturally a period of grief.  Even if we aren't close and don't socialize, we are accustomed to them being there.

[homedecor1]

@geezerette

sorry to hear of the loss of your husband.  We just had a nice man pass suddenly on our street -- honestly, it was shocking (yes he was 95) but walked his little dog everyday & was always friendly.

I let his wife know how much I always enjoyed his pleasant conversations & friendliness.  He is truly missed!

[misschristy]

I'm so sorry.  Sudden death is terrible.  

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the woman who lost her entire family in the Duck Boat Accident.  I watched her press conference from the hospital.  I just can't seem to stop thinking of her.  

All we can do is pray for them.