Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,672
Registered: ‎03-10-2010


[ Edited ]

1.   Bouncer:  "Sorry, I need to see your ID."

      Girl:  "I told you I'm thirty years old. 

      Why would anyone lie about that?"


2.   People say, "I'm taking it one day at a time."

      "You know what?  So is everyone else.  That's

        how time works."


3.   Ann: I hear that you are a hypochondriac.

      Stan:  Well, my doctor says I'm not, but

       I spent 3 days reading about it on the

       Internet and I have all the symptoms.


4.   A guy gets pulled over by a cop.  The cop asks,

You were speeding, didn't you see the speed limit sign? The man replies, "Yes, I saw the speed limit sign, but  I didn't see you."


5.   Q.  If you're an American in the kitchen, 

           what are you when you're in the bathroom?

       A. European.


6.   My wife is so negative.  I remembered the

     car seat, the stroller, and the diaper bag. 

     Yet all she can talk about is how I forgot

     the baby.


                            I'm not old.

                            I'm a classic.

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,602
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

All are funny but that last one is hysterical. 🤣🤣🤣❤️☕️

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,475
Registered: ‎06-13-2010

@Lindsays Grandma  I wish I had the animated emoji that is rolling on the floor laughing, because that is how I feel about #6🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣. Goodness-every time I read it, I crack up all over again.🤣🤣🤣 That is definitely the joke of the DAY( wiping my eyes).😁



~~~All we need is LOVE💖