Roe is Me! - Happy Valentine's Day!

by ‎02-11-2016 12:31 PM - edited ‎02-11-2016 12:36 PM

Valentine’s Day is all about love and romance, but for those of us who are married or in a relationship, we know it's not always sunshine and rainbows. There are factors in life which are bound to add stressors no matter how much people love one another. Life is not always easy and curveballs are thrown at times. 




What do you do during those stressful or painful times in your relationship? How do you respond to one another?


I am not an expert by any means, but Mark and I have been married for 32 years. We’ve shared wonderful times as well as difficult times. 




Some of our stressful times have included:

  • a leukemia scare for one of our children
  • Car accidents with kids who are new drivers
  • A wayward teen
  • Moving far away from both of our families
  • The deaths of both of our parents
  • A lost job
  • The deaths of two of our kids' best friends





Difficult times such as those can either drive a wedge between couples or draw them even closer together. I think it all depends on how we react to each other and how we interact with one another. 


Here are a few ways Mark and I ensure we are drawn closer together:

  • Mark and I talk to each other and really listen to each other, even when we disagree. We also try to listen without judgment. The more we talk, the more we understand each other.
  • We try to see things from the other's perspective. We try to humble ourselves and admit if we need guidance and help from a professional when we do not know how to handle a situation properly.
  • We strive to nurture each other's pain.  It’s only human to feel the need for validation and to know that someone cares about them, especially when they are hurting. It’s easy to run from each other during tough times, but running TO each other instead has really helped enrich and strengthen our marriage.
  • Mark and I pray together and we always have faith God will help us get through anything life throws our way.
  • Splitting up is not an option for us, so we have always found the ways to work it out.
  • We also make sure we take time for just the two of us, even if it's just a dinner out without the kids. 
  • We focus on our marriage more than we focus on the stressful situation as much as we can.

I think Valentine's Day can be a celebration that we are still together and still in love, even after all the difficult times we have been through ……. The difficult times most couples have been through. 




Believe me, that's worth celebrating!


Happy Valentine’s Day!


Counting our blessings,

Mary Beth Roe