Blogs

Beth's Amazing Journey #10

by ‎04-01-2016 01:59 PM - edited ‎04-01-2016 02:01 PM

 

It has been five months since my beautiful, Beth, went to heaven. Each day I think of another story and another hundred reasons why I want you to know about her. I thought of this story earlier this week and it tells a lot about how much she loved me.

 

My father and I didn’t have the best relationship when I was growing up. My parents were divorced when I was eleven years old and after that time, I was never alone with him, one-on-one, until I was in my thirties. I didn’t see him much when I was a kid. Really, the only time I did see him was when I rode my bike to his dental practice after school. He was usually busy seeing patients, so he would often say, “here’s a couple of bucks go buy yourself some baseball cards.” I didn’t want his money; I wanted him.

 

BethJourneyTen2.jpg

 

The truth is I had forgiven my dad a long time ago. I actually felt sorry for him because he missed a lot by not being with his own family while we were growing up. My adopted sister, Dawn, is every bit as much my sister as my two biological sisters. She didn’t want anything to do with my dad’s second wife because she always thought of our mom as her only mom. She never wanted to have two families, so she didn’t particularly enjoy visiting dad and the woman who gave her up for adoption. He divorced his second wife after ten years when he discovered she was having an affair with a neighbor. He later remarried for a third and final time.

 

As I got older and after Beth and I married, I had a deep desire to reconnect and get to know my dad better. It seemed he was still uncomfortable with the thought of being alone with me. Beth decided she was going to solve that dilemma. One day we were visiting my dad at his home in South Haven, Michigan, which was located right on Lake Michigan. Beth, my dad, and I decided to go for a walk on the beach. We walked about a mile when Beth said she had to go back to the house and she took off running down the beach and left my dad and me alone. It was awkward at first, but then the conversation got easier. We walked and talked and then walked and talked some more. Before we knew it, the sun was setting. We got home after dark and after that day, my dad and I grew very close. In fact, whenever we visited him, he always wanted alone time with just me.

 

BethJourneyTen4.jpg

 

My dad contracted Hodgkin’s disease in his fifties, but it went into remission for over fifteen years. Twenty- one years ago, he and Sally came to visit us here in Pennsylvania and we could tell he was not healthy. His cancer came back and took him to heaven twenty years ago in May of 1996. 

 

I was able to fly to Michigan periodically to take him for some of his chemo treatments and help care for him. One day I looked at him in the hospital when he was really sick and I asked him if he wanted to continue with the chemotherapy.  He shook his head no. I told the doctor we were done and took him home. Before he died he told me one of his biggest regrets was divorcing my mom and leaving his kids. But he told me how proud he was of me and that he was so glad that we became close. I told him that it was because of Beth. He told me that marrying her was the smartest thing I ever did.

 

BethJourneyTen3.jpg

 

My dad was crazy about Beth, but then again, everybody who knew her felt the same way. She cared deeply and loved intensely. How could I ever repay her for helping me find the relationship with my dad that I had always wanted?  I can’t and I couldn’t.

 

However, I can write about Beth and tell you just a few of the reasons why I loved her and continue to love her so much.

 

BethJourneyTen1.jpg

 

Thanks for reading and God bless.

 

To read any of my past blogs, click here and to keep up with me daily life, go to my Facebook page here. 

 

Comments
by
on ‎04-01-2016 02:37 PM

Dan thank you for posting this very special blog.  How wonderful you were able to reconnect with your dad. It was  blessing to  have Beth come with you when first visiting your dad.  How wonderful that God  reopened doors for you and your dad  to reconnect.   I'm sure it was bittersweet to hear your dad confess he never should have divorced your mom.  It was also a way to close that hurtful part of the past and to heal those old wounds.  A blessing you were able to truly get to know your dad.  Continued blessings to you and your family. xx

by
‎04-01-2016 03:42 PM - edited ‎04-01-2016 03:45 PM

Dan, you have a lifetime blessing in your Beth. She will remain in your heart forever, and I believe you are going to be okay. These are difficult times for you. Your writing about Beth will help you in your journey. God Bless you Dan, today, and always. Smiley Happy

 

by GO 2 DSNY
on ‎04-01-2016 03:49 PM

I enjoy reading your blog each Friday...I take a break from my chores and read about your journey with Beth. What's nice is that it's not a movie, not a novel or short story, not a TV show...but a real-life love story! 💕💕💕 Wow, you two were blessed! Thanks for sharing and have a blessed weekend!

by
on ‎04-01-2016 07:33 PM

It sounds to me as if Beth was a genius as far as emotions and human relationships were concerned.  I don't know what her formal education was, but she clearly had a Ph.D. in getting along, acting as a go-between, and reaching out to friends and strangers.  The two of you were lucky to have made such a beautiful life together.  All the best to you and your family.  Let us know when your new grandchild arrives!

by poota-boota
on ‎04-01-2016 07:56 PM
Enjoy reading about the love of your life...see was an amazing woman. You were very blessed to have her. God smiled on you when he sent her in your direction. God bless Dan.
by
on ‎04-01-2016 08:49 PM

Thank you for sharing.  So glad you were able to have a relationship with your Dad, thanks to your wife.  She sounded like a sweetheart.

by poshlove
on ‎04-01-2016 09:58 PM

Dan, you are such an inspiration, a breath of fresh air to hear you speak of your beloved Beth.  There aren't many people in this day and age who find a love like the one you and Beth shared.  You both were so blessed to have found each other and shared your lives together.  It is not surprising that she was a means to your finding your way back to your Dad.  I know she wanted you and him to have a relationship as father and son as she was such a family oriented person.  I enjoy reading your blogs and I enjoy seeing you on the Q.   You are such a genuine person and it comes through.  No wonder Beth loved you so much.  Take care of  yourself  and continue to share your memories of your sweet Beth.  Blessings always.

 

 

 

by widgetww
on ‎04-01-2016 11:16 PM

Dan I really enjoy listening about you love for Beth and her wonderful love for you!!She is a wonderful soul!! You had something many people would love to have had. True love of spirit. You see I was married for Thirty six years. I became cronic ill . My husband couldn't handle it ! I have forgiven him as now after Ten yrs. We talk and I tell him how to cook. I wanted to get better and search for help. He was worried about money. I went on without him. Found some help for a while. I realized he didn't love me for my spirit it was looks and all show. I loved him in every way I could. You and Beth loved each other's spirit. And you both still do love each other in spirit. I hope I made sense. I just know I will never forget you at night when I was crawling and so sad, I felt someone cared YOU WOULD ALWAYS SAY GOD BLESS . JUST AFTER MY PARENTS DIED A WEEK APART I DIVORCED MY HUSBAND AND WENT TO NY AND HAD A BIG SURGERY ON MY BACK. AGAIN .  YOU AND BETHS LOVE WILL LALWAYS BE THERE. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!!😇😇😇😇😇😇

by
on ‎04-02-2016 12:10 AM

Thank you, Dan.  What a beautiful person your wife, Beth was.

What a gift to your family to have experienced your very special relationship.

You demonstrated in your daily lives how a loving couple should care for each

other.

Keep writing your wonderful blogs.  It is a gift to us as well.

by
on ‎04-02-2016 02:21 AM

Wow, what a touching story.  BOTH you and Beth are very special people.  I look forward to these blogs every Friday.  When my mom is visiting I read them aloud to her and she often cries.  They're tears of joy for the beautiful love story, what a wonderful woman Beth was and how much you loved and appreciated her.

by
on ‎04-02-2016 07:38 AM

What a wonderful person Beth was . Thank you for sharing that story Dan.

by BenThePup
on ‎04-02-2016 09:15 AM

Dan,

Your story is amazing and uplifting.Thank you for sharing your memories with us.

I look forward to reading your blog every week.

So happy for you that you re-connected with your Dad.

Your love for Beth,and hers' for you is profound.

You're an amazing man with a big heart. Please continue

to write. I know it is a healthy way to heal.

Beth sounds remarkable! God is carrying you along this difficult journey.

God Bless you and your family!   Nancy

by mnbvcxz
on ‎04-02-2016 11:12 AM

It appears that sharing stories about your Beloved is helping you through the grieving process. I believe that it is a healthy sign that you are able to be so open about your pain.

 

And isn't it comforting to know that you have so many friends out here, most whom you will never meet, who are reading your blogs and responding with sympathy and understanding!

 

I was a young wife and mother when my father died many years ago. When I returned to work after the funeral, my boss, in trying to comfort me, told me that it would get better with time. I resented the comment, because I didn't think I would ever get over my dad's passing. And who was she to assume that I could ever not be grief-stricken?

But she was right: In time, the pain did ease.

 

That's not to say that I don't still miss my dad. He was a great man. And many people to this day-- more than three decades after his passing---still share stories about how he inspired them or how generous he was with them and their families in their times of need, etc. But what replaced that initial pain and overwhelming sense of loss, is a wealth of warm, happy memories of a man whom I was blessed to have as my father. 

 

Stay strong, and keep looking UP! It will get better with time.

by sueokie
on ‎04-02-2016 12:06 PM

Look forward to these blogs each week for they are always so inspiring and uplifting. Thank you for sharing these precious moments that made for a wonderful life and relationship. Thank you. God bless.

 

by lindag1651
on ‎04-02-2016 03:36 PM
Dan, You were so blessed to have Beth and she you. I'm sure she had many amazing stories about you and why she loved you.Remember it takes 2 to have a great and meaningful relationship. My husband and I are still madly in love after 42 years of marriage. I have seen him through cancer twice and he has seen me through Lupus and an amputation. We still consider ourselves to be healthy although who knows what God holds for us in the future. You and Beth had a special relationship, but remember that you were half of that. God bless!!!!
by
on ‎04-02-2016 08:43 PM

Dan....I enjoy your journeys and am sure they are painful and  therapeutic too. I just have to say....in this age right now,...with so much hatred and anger in our society/world....thank you for sharing LOVE!!!  It is uplifting!  You were very blessed to have shared that special love and now it continues with your daughters and grandchildren.   Thanks for sharing!

by
on ‎04-03-2016 07:33 PM

So very touching.  It seems you had a very special, strong bond.  I am sorry for any heart break you may feel in her not being physically here with you.  Death may end a life as we know it, but love never dies.  May your memories bring you comfort.  Your wife sounds like an incredibly good soul.  

by
on ‎04-03-2016 09:13 PM

Dan,

I have enjoyed reading all of your blogs about your sweet wife, Beth. This particular blog about you and your dad struck a note with me as I have not had a great relationship with my father throughout my whole life.  But I always felt love for him since he was and always would be my dad.  It's so wonderful that you and your father got to reconnect and have a relationship before he passed on.

You were indeed lucky to have Beth but I don't think you give yourself enough credit, Dan!  For Beth chose you to be her mate for life...so you are pretty wonderful yourself!

Thanks for sharing, I look forward to reading!

Bless you and your family!

by Eagle-girl
on ‎04-03-2016 10:21 PM

Thank you, Dan. You write so beautifully. How blessed you and Beth were to have each other. Love never dies. ❤️ You have touched my heart....Continued blessings to you. ❤️❤️❤️

 

 

 

 

by
on ‎04-05-2016 05:28 AM

Dan,

You can keep these stories coming as long as you like; they are really uplifting. I look forward to reading them each time I see you posted. I hope you find peace and joy in the rest of your life.

by
on ‎04-05-2016 08:49 AM
Dan,
Thank you for sharing your beautiful stories about Beth and your life together. When you first began writing them I could not read them. You see this coming Friday it will be one year since my precious husband returned to the presence of our Father after a year long journey with brain cancer. To read your story and the love you have with your Beth was so painful. I journaled throughout Loren's illness and often since he went HOME it really helps, doesn't it? I was given an amazing book by our pastor right after Loren's death by a gentleman named Tom Zuba, "Permission To Mourn A New Way To Do Grief." His story is extraordinary. But one thing he shares is to TELL our story over and over again because it is in the telling of our story that we heal. Thank you for sharing. God Bless you and your family.
by magpie03
on ‎04-05-2016 11:18 AM

Thank you for such a loving story about your family. It isn't always easy ,especially a man ,to express such a journey of personal trials and blessings. My heart goes out to you because of your losses, but I also rejoice because of the love and faith that you all shared. This walk of ours was never promised to be without pain yet i have always found that our Heavenly Father always promises us love and compation on our journey. Now that I have learned about your dad and wife I will be praying for you. We are all family.

by Khudasgal
on ‎04-05-2016 12:07 PM

  Thank You for sharing Dan. Always enjoy your stoies. Smiley Happy  Bless your heart. My husband, also has a good heart and I am so blessed to have him. You and your lovely wife were lucky to have each other as well. Smiley Happy