Beauty

[willdob3]

@Goodie2shoes  You can't win. Really. No matter what you say or don't say. People can take things the wrong way no matter what. They hear what they expect to hear, not necessarily what was said and meant.

The official "appropriate" compliment would not mention the makeup at all. Makeup is generally worn to make the person wearing it more attractive. Complimenting the makeup doesn't do that. We are supposed to notice the one wearing the makeup looks nice, not that the makeup looks nice.  "Wow! You look great!" If she wants to discuss the makeup she will bring it up.

This goes for clothing, too. "You look so pretty today!" is better than complimenting an article of clothing. That said, "That color really looks good on you" might be acceptable. But they might decide that you think all other colors look bad on them....

Compliment the person, not the stuff. It is all about the wording used. 

[Tori3569]

I can see why your neighbor was a little taken aback by the makeup comment even though that wasn't the intent.  She may have felt self conscious about the makeup in the first place.  Better to just tell someone they look nice and not be very specific.  

[ahoymate]

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@J Town Girl wrote:

A few years ago I stopped in to the shop owned by the lady who does my facials.  I had been running errands and needed to pick up a skin care item that she had ordered for me.  Normally when I go for a facial I wear only minimum make-up so she had never seen how I look when I spend more time on my make-up.

Her first words were wow your make-up looks terrific.  You've applied it with such a skillful hand it really looks great.  

I certainly didn't take it as a criticism.  I felt it was a compliment.  I would never get upset by someone saying something nice about my make-up.  

There's no such thing as looking completely natural when you apply make-up.  That's the reason we use it.  We want to enhance our good features and play down the features that we don't like.

Why would someone look to be offended when no offense was meant.   

Hello!

1) Taking offense happens all the time & on this forum - everyday people feel offended.

2) Telling someone "you've applied it with such a skillful hand it really looks great" is definately NOT something you tell someone.

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[Tinkrbl44]

@Goodie2shoes 

I wonder if your neighbor will bring it up again.  

Compliments aren't always received how we mean them to be.

Last year I was out shopping and arrived at the store's revolving door the same time 3 twenty-something gals were coming out.

One of them saw what I was wearing and stopped to talk .... she said

"Wow, what a beautiful jacket!  My grandmother would love that!"  

Her grandmother would like it.  lol

[ccassaday]

Just say you look pretty without mentioning the makeup.

[Jk9]

It's sad to me @Goodie2shoes that a well intended compliment can go so wrong.  I guess that's why I don't talk to people much.  Good that I live out where my neighbors aren't close.

[monicakm]

@Goodie2shoes 

I don't think the average person would react that way. I know I wouldn't.  I am often complimented on my makeup or my looks without makeup being mentioned. I appreciate both and consider both a positive comment. It was very nice of you to compliment her makeup even though it backfired. Don't keep her reaction from complimenting others.

[monicakm]

@J Town Girl 

My mother and my husband both say I look like a little girl without makeup. Do I want to look like a little girl or do I want to look glam? I think they're biased so I'm going with glam.

[SportyShorty07]

@Goodie2shoes  I wish I could be your neighbor! I love it when people compliment my makeup and I'm not offended when they do .  The other day I donated my clothes to a used clothing store and the girl working there said, "I love your  makeup! What products do you use?" It made my day to hear that and I told her my favorite makeup products and I complimented her makeup and asked about her favorite products. 

[Goodie2shoes]

Thanks for the positive feedback. I will just say hello and keep my thoughts to myself when it comes to appearance. She's been a nice neighbor so we will leave it at that.