I'm not sure why you are not getting good results.
I agree that going slowly is best. This is not the same as shaving. You need to go slow enough to catch the hairs. Also, the motion used is not the same as shaving. I find I get the best results when I go over an area at least twice & use the high speed once & the low speed once.
When I first started epilating I got little red bumps all over my legs & my legs would be a bit irritated. That always went away quickly. It was a little less each time. I really don't get the bumps anymore but my legs still get a bit irritated for a few minutes.
I really don't worry about extra exfoliating. Sometimes I epilate after my shower, sometimes I don't.
Geez, the words this board won't allow... 