Beauty

[aprilskies]

I am watching the Green Zone with Matt Damon.  I think I have seen this before but not sure if I finished it.  It is an older movie.  I dont know if there are many Matt Damon fans here, but he is a cutie and he is playing a tough military guy.  Oh my.

[kathie66]

@just bee  Geez bee just finished reading the whole thread, thank goodness you are ok. And you once again inspire me, as you have for years. You are surviving one day at a time to the best of your ability. You have touched many lives here on the boards, brought a smile and a laugh to erase tears. Kind words to lift others when they were down. Please know that you are appreciated and cared about!!

Take a moment to savor the sunset or sunrise, the warmth of your DH's hand in yours and look into the worlds greatest dogs eyes and see the love reflected back to you and know that you will get through this! You are certainly one of the strongest people I "know." And also it's ok to cry, throw things, yell and scream and curse if it helps as well, you would hear me screaming in New Mexico all the way from New York if I was going through half of what you are bee! XO

[just bee]

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@kathie66 wrote:

@just bee  Geez bee just finished reading the whole thread, thank goodness you are ok. And you once again inspire me, as you have for years. You are surviving one day at a time to the best of your ability. You have touched many lives here on the boards, brought a smile and a laugh to erase tears. Kind words to lift others when they were down. Please know that you are appreciated and cared about!!

Take a moment to savor the sunset or sunrise, the warmth of your DH's hand in yours and look into the worlds greatest dogs eyes and see the love reflected back to you and know that you will get through this! You are certainly one of the strongest people I "know." And also it's ok to cry, throw things, yell and scream and curse if it helps as well, you would hear me screaming in New Mexico all the way from New York if I was going through half of what you are bee! XO

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@kathie66 

Aw, shucks!

[just bee]

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@aprilskies wrote:

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@geezerette wrote:

@aprilskies 

@rnmom 

Don’t feel bad about your HEPs.  I just had coffee ice cream for breakfast.☺️  (It was delicious!😋)

I’ve decided (again) to not keep any junk in the house.  I’m going to allow myself one day a week—in my case, shopping day—to eat a certain amount of junk.  Mine will probably be a salty and a sweet.  And that’s it.  If I keep anything more around, it gets eaten immediately (like this morning’s ice cream) and I just want more.  I’ve even gotten so bad as to drive to the store purposely just to buy junk, and for me that’s quite a hike.  But if I don’t allow myself something, I just keep thinking about junk food.  

Can’t win.  But it’s worth a try.

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@geezerette, yum coffee ice cream. One of my favs. It as least had a breakfast drink in it.   Isnt it a crime to throw out ice cream?

I was able to get a lot of junk food out of the house. I still have some but have no intention of getting rid of it all. Otherwise I will just load up again and I dont want to do that.  I am giving myself one more day and then I need to put a plan in place.

I agree with you. I do it for a while, start to feel good and then fall down the rabbitt hole again. Only each time is a little bit worse. 

We can do this @geezerette, @rnmom, let's do this together for June.  We can do a month, yes?  After all, we are not 5 years old.

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@aprilskies 

@geezerette 

What I prefer to coffee ice-cream is what my mother used to give me when I was a kid: A mug of hot, strong coffee with a generous dollop of vanilla ice-cream.

That was the best!

[just bee]

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@aprilskies wrote:

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We can do this @geezerette, @rnmom, let's do this together for June.  We can do a month, yes?  After all, we are not 5 years old.

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@aprilskies 

That's so funny!

[just bee]

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@aprilskies wrote:

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@just bee wrote:

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@aprilskies wrote:

@geezerette , you are really doing good with everything. Keep it up.

I took a bag to donate but I have to bag up the rest and take it out. Although, I am considering the Lupus foundation but they will not be in the area until the 15th.  They will even take my bed frame.  It is time to get that out too.  I bought a foundation bed thinking it would fit right into the bed frame but i was wrong. I suppose measuring would of helped.  

I decluttered and organized some paperwork and am just amazed, the more I organize the bigger mess I seem to have. I think I just need to start tossing without thinking about things too much in general.  Things just seem to multiply.  It is crazy, I feel sometimes I am not getting anywhere.   It will take forever to get through everything at the rate I am going.  I guess I am debating on whether to sell some things but I dont know if I want to go through the hassle. 

I have not purchased any skincare or mu in May.  This makes 5 months. It helps that I have tossed so much product and still am tossing the stuff that made the first cut.  So when the urge hits, I think about the waste and it keeps me from going crazy.   I will use up what I have first, well skincare that is, mu is a lost cause. 

HEP, well, you know.  Starting June, I am going to attempt to eat more clean. I am not giving up sugar but I do need to substantially reduce it.  I vowed to fit into my summer clothes this year and it is not looking good so far.

We just got one heck of a rain storm. I have never seen it rain so hard. So we have severe flooding warning until 9 30 tonight and a tornado warning until 9 30 as well. We rarely get tornado warnings in this area.  How scary is that. 

Junk it June is so fitting.

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@aprilskies 

That's what I'm experiencing right now.  I'm faced with so much stuff and I have to make so many decisions.  I found a refrigerator magnet in a pile that says something like, "Some days it feels like all I'm doing is rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic."

That's exactly how I feel right now.  I'm moving things from pile to pile, from room to room.  I don't know what to do with some things so after staring at them for a few minutes I stuff them into bags and throw them away.

I look at the house and I see how long this is taking and how haphazard the process is because I have limited time to act.  If I had devoted more time to this before the fire, I wonder how much time it would have taken.

How much time was I willing to spend decluttering, sorting, organizing, washing and donating clothes, pruning collections?  Obviously not that much because I hadn't done it.

But how long?  How much of my life would have been spent on this project?  How many years did it take to create it?

In some ways I have to look at this disaster as an opportunity to deal with something I've been avoiding.  On one hand I feel like this is my punishment for procrastinating; on the other hand, I feel like it's the only way I would have acted and finally addressed all the cr@p.

I can feel my thought process changing inside my head.  It's almost as if tectonic plates are shifting.  I don't think I could have made these decisions before the fire.  I was getting close to the point where I wanted to do something and closer to the point where I knew I needed to do something, but the actual doing was not happening quickly enough.

I appreciate that I'd stopped collecting -- that helped.  But so many of the things I had collected were never used.

I don't know how much time you want to spend on this because it takes time away from something else and it's a painful reminder of unwise decisions.

Amazing how many items don't spark joy.  I'm realizing, too, that I've hung on to items that do the opposite.  They hold memories, but the memories are not happy ones.  I'm letting many of those items go.

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Everyone has been hitting the nail on the head with all of this and your post @just bee is no different. I could of written this word for word.  It is exactly how I feel.

It is time to work through all of this stuff - slow but consistent.

Yes, eating healthy is my Junket for June.  It has to be if I can get myself to behave.  

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@aprilskies 

It explains why I've been so paralyzed this week.  I have several boxes with a few items in each but I still haven't committed to filling the boxes, sealing them and moving them to storage.  The most I've done the past couple days is take some casual clothes to be laundered.

I'm still torn over what to keep, what I'll actually use and what I should let go.  Most is going to landfill.  But is the stuff I'm keeping going to be used or are the weird odds and ends I come across just sentimental?

I have three days left.  If that.

A few days ago I found a scarf collection and I shut down.  I haven't worn scarves in years, but I couldn't decide what to do with them.  Each one reminds me of my sister.

If I keep them I'll have them cleaned and then they'll be squirreled away somewhere.  Better to let them go now?

Old Barbie dolls, rubber stamps, cards, stationery, knick knacks... can't seem to make the final decisions.

[just bee]

Today's the last day of May already.

Any parting words?

[geezerette]

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@just bee wrote:

Today's the last day of May already.

Any parting words?

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@just bee 

I imagine you have a few choice ones!  Although I’m not sure they’d pass the censors.  😄

[River Song]

@just bee ,

My Mom gave away all my Barbie dolls when I started college.  Came home during a break and they were gone! Same with stuffed animals.  I had a few Barbies (a couple with the bendable knees), a Ken doll, Skipper, Midge, the car, the fold out house.  Handmade doll clothes.  All gone.  I was miffed at the time but I don't miss them now.  You won't either.  Off they go.

I still have the Monopoly board game we played with as kids.  Well worn and missing pieces and paper money.  It's in a closet, haven't looked at in 30 years.  I need to get rid of it, come to think of it.  I enjoy board games but DH isn't a fan so I don't have anyone to play with.

I have a drawer full of scarves.  Love to look at them, actually wearing them, eh, not so much.  Mostly because it's too hot here for most of the year and just thinking about them around my neck makes me sweat.  They are a winter clothing item for me.  Keep the ones that spark joy (or good memories) and ditch the rest you know you'll never wear.  Yes, even the silk ones.

Stationary and blank cards.  I would keep office supplies if they don't smell smoky.

Knick knacks, just no.  Dust collectors.  Off they go.

[River Song]

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@just bee wrote:

Today's the last day of May already.

Any parting words?

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I, for one, am glad to see May in the rear view mirror.

Bring on Junk It! Junket June.