Beauty

[Hoovermom]

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@just bee wrote:

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@rnmom wrote:

@geezerette - I know it's hard to imagine what I would do if I were in @just bee 's shoes, but I kinda feel like you do, like I would just junk everything and start over. With the exception of some of my kids' sentimental items and pictures, I could part with just about anything in this house. I'm not an overly sentimental person to begin with, it's all just "stuff". I'd take the insurance money and just start over from scratch.

It's easy to say, but I'm sure it's not as easy seeing everything that you've accumulated over a lifetime be destroyed and thrown away. I just really can't imagine. 

It's definitely worth putting some thought into for sure, "Did I use this stuff when I had it?" It may be the most beautiful item in the world, but if it didn't get used before, it won't get used now, and there certainly wouldn't be a point in restoring it. 

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@rnmom 

@geezerette 

I bought lead crystal flutes and other similar items as well as a set of Christmas dishes and accessories back in the 80s.  I never used the dishes and only a few of the glasses.  Yet I felt I needed to wipe off the boxes and put them in the storage unit.

Will I use those Christmas dishes?  Don't know.  But I just couldn't see tossing all of that.

I'm going to have to prune my mug collection.  That will be a challenge.

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@just bee :  Bless your heart as we say here in the South.  I admire your strength in the days since the fire.  Maybe with you putting things in storage, later your mind will be able to say "no, time to get rid of that".  Losing everything at one time would be devastating and holding on some things would help me.  I know my words are "halting" but am having a hard time putting them into the written word.  Please continue to keep updating as I am sure a lot of "lurkers" like me are concerned for you.

[just bee]

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@Hoovermom wrote:

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@just bee :  Bless your heart as we say here in the South.  I admire your strength in the days since the fire.  Maybe with you putting things in storage, later your mind will be able to say "no, time to get rid of that".  Losing everything at one time would be devastating and holding on some things would help me.  I know my words are "halting" but am having a hard time putting them into the written word.  Please continue to keep updating as I am sure a lot of "lurkers" like me are concerned for you.

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@Hoovermom 

Thank you for the kind words.  My mother had a neighbor and I adored her; one night her house went up in flames.  They lost just about everything and they had a lot to lose.  That house had been packed with stuff.

After the home was rebuilt, she started collecting again and quickly refilled the house.

BH thinks I'll start collecting all over again and fill up the house.  I don't think so.

It makes me ill to lose all the books, movies, music... so much is ruined.  It cannot be replaced so why try?

I'm still annoyed that all the toiletries and tea shouldn't be used.  What a waste.

[geezerette]

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@Hoovermom wrote:

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@just bee wrote:

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@rnmom wrote:

@geezerette - I know it's hard to imagine what I would do if I were in @just bee 's shoes, but I kinda feel like you do, like I would just junk everything and start over. With the exception of some of my kids' sentimental items and pictures, I could part with just about anything in this house. I'm not an overly sentimental person to begin with, it's all just "stuff". I'd take the insurance money and just start over from scratch.

It's easy to say, but I'm sure it's not as easy seeing everything that you've accumulated over a lifetime be destroyed and thrown away. I just really can't imagine. 

It's definitely worth putting some thought into for sure, "Did I use this stuff when I had it?" It may be the most beautiful item in the world, but if it didn't get used before, it won't get used now, and there certainly wouldn't be a point in restoring it. 

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@rnmom 

@geezerette 

I bought lead crystal flutes and other similar items as well as a set of Christmas dishes and accessories back in the 80s.  I never used the dishes and only a few of the glasses.  Yet I felt I needed to wipe off the boxes and put them in the storage unit.

Will I use those Christmas dishes?  Don't know.  But I just couldn't see tossing all of that.

I'm going to have to prune my mug collection.  That will be a challenge.

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@just bee :  Bless your heart as we say here in the South.  I admire your strength in the days since the fire.  Maybe with you putting things in storage, later your mind will be able to say "no, time to get rid of that".  Losing everything at one time would be devastating and holding on some things would help me.  I know my words are "halting" but am having a hard time putting them into the written word.  Please continue to keep updating as I am sure a lot of "lurkers" like me are concerned for you.

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@Hoovermom 

❤️

[geezerette]

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@just bee wrote:

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@rnmom wrote:

@just bee -Wow, I think I would lose my mind if I came home and saw a team of strangers going thru my items deciding what stays and what goes. It's bad enough that you're going thru this whole ordeal, but to come home and find that is absolutely ridiculous. I can totally understand your frustration and I'm not sure I would be as gracious about it as you are. 

I'm glad you stopped them and unpacked the boxes and told them not to save the paperback books. Around here we can get paperback books at garage sales and library sales all the time for 50 cents, so I can definitely understand why those should not be saved.

I'm sure that you're exhausted both mentally and physically, but I hope you continue to stand up for yourself and don't let them make decisions that you want to make for yourself. I'm cheering you on!

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@rnmom 

I have so many paperbacks; however, what they were boxing up yesterday was a mix of hardcovers and softcovers -- not the regular paperback.  I'd already been told that 1) softcover/paperbacks can't be restored and 2) I shouldn't try to restore anything worth less than $25.

That describes a lot of my books.  Most of them were purchased for less than $25.  I have to meet with the crew again today to have them pack up what to save, but I'm nowhere near ready to do that.  I can give them all my most recent nursing textbooks, but some are softcover.

I just don't know.

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@just bee 

So let me get this straight—the employees of the company that told you not to restore soft cover books or anything under $25 were the ones packing up those very things for restoration?  I think I’d be like @rnmom and be less than gracious.

[geezerette]

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@just bee wrote:

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@Hoovermom wrote:

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@just bee :  Bless your heart as we say here in the South.  I admire your strength in the days since the fire.  Maybe with you putting things in storage, later your mind will be able to say "no, time to get rid of that".  Losing everything at one time would be devastating and holding on some things would help me.  I know my words are "halting" but am having a hard time putting them into the written word.  Please continue to keep updating as I am sure a lot of "lurkers" like me are concerned for you.

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@Hoovermom 

Thank you for the kind words.  My mother had a neighbor and I adored her; one night her house went up in flames.  They lost just about everything and they had a lot to lose.  That house had been packed with stuff.

After the home was rebuilt, she started collecting again and quickly refilled the house.

BH thinks I'll start collecting all over again and fill up the house.  I don't think so.

It makes me ill to lose all the books, movies, music... so much is ruined.  It cannot be replaced so why try?

I'm still annoyed that all the toiletries and tea shouldn't be used.  What a waste.

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@just bee 

I don’t think you’ll start collecting things again.  Although it might seem like it at first because you’ll end up buying so many necessities back.  

I think you’ll be very selective in what you buy.  After all, much of what you’ve had trouble parting with up until now has been the memories those things hold, not necessarily the things themselves.  But you both will be accumulating new memories going forward.  And new things.  Just not necessarily as many new things.

[geezerette]

@rnmom 

@aprilskies 

Don’t feel bad about falling short with HEP.  Me too.  But I’ve felt so bad lately that I’ve started to clamp down seriously on my diet.  While I don’t think it’s the sole reason, but I do know eating poorly contributes to my feeling bad.  Duh.  I even stuck to my guns when I went grocery shopping yesterday.  It’s amazing how much less my grocery bill was when I wasn’t buying junk!  There’s some incentive right there.  

I can’t say that I’ve lost more than a pound or two, but I’m more concerned with eating healthy at this point rather than losing pounds.  That can come later when I’ve gotten back in the groove of doing without junk.  It takes a while for those cravings to go away, but this has to be a permanent lifestyle change for me.  It’s a pain in the neck and something I hate, but (as my mother used to say) I’m hurting nobody but myself.

Good luck, you two!  

[aprilskies]

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@rnmom wrote:

@aprilskies -jewelry is definitely something that I need to go thru too. I don't wear hardly any of it anymore but mostly everything that I have is sterling silver with semi precious stones, bought years ago from QVC. I have just about every color stone and pearl they make. Also some gold, but not nearly as much of that. 

I'd gladly sell a good portion of it because it's not being used, but I don't just want to donate it all and give it all away for nothing, I spent way too much money to just do that. But I haven't had much luck selling it either. So that is my dilemma. Keep it here, give it away, or try to sell it for pennies on the dollar. 

I don't even have any girls to pass any of it onto. I've taken some of it to a jewelry shop and sold it for the price of the gold/silver, I really need to do that again. 

I also have a large jewelry armoire that sits on the floor and holds this big collection. Someday I'd like to get rid of that too and just have a small jewelry box with my favorite items. That is one of my plans for when we move and downsize. That won't be for many years yet, but I'm already thinking in my head about what is going to be moved with us and what will be eliminated and that is on the to be eliminated list. 

It is very overwhelming going thru everything and can take a long time. I have a lot of time to putter and make decisions. Plus I know that a lot of my stuff will be leaving when my kids do. 

Just take your time, maybe do a little bit each day or each weekend when you feel like it. If you get overwhelmed, take a break. Any decision you make and any item that you get rid of is progress. 

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@rnmom, yup, everything you mentioned is my dilemma too.  I am not ready to let it go pennies on the dollar or donate it. If the pieces are not going for a reasonable price, I will just hang on to them.  I dont have a lot of Jay King pieces but I dont do chunky anymore so I figured I would start with those. I researched pieces on ebay and some were selling and some not and for various prices.  Things are just not what they use to be.  I will start with one and see how it goes. 

Yes, it will be a slow process. I really hate selling. I cant stand anything about it, but if I do it slowly, hopefully, it wont be bad.  At least with jewelry the packages are not huge.

And, like you, I dont have anyone really to leave it too.  Would your boys not appreciate it?  Something to be able to share with their wives one day.

[aprilskies]

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@geezerette wrote:

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@just bee wrote:

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@rnmom wrote:

@just bee -Wow, I think I would lose my mind if I came home and saw a team of strangers going thru my items deciding what stays and what goes. It's bad enough that you're going thru this whole ordeal, but to come home and find that is absolutely ridiculous. I can totally understand your frustration and I'm not sure I would be as gracious about it as you are. 

I'm glad you stopped them and unpacked the boxes and told them not to save the paperback books. Around here we can get paperback books at garage sales and library sales all the time for 50 cents, so I can definitely understand why those should not be saved.

I'm sure that you're exhausted both mentally and physically, but I hope you continue to stand up for yourself and don't let them make decisions that you want to make for yourself. I'm cheering you on!

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@rnmom 

I have so many paperbacks; however, what they were boxing up yesterday was a mix of hardcovers and softcovers -- not the regular paperback.  I'd already been told that 1) softcover/paperbacks can't be restored and 2) I shouldn't try to restore anything worth less than $25.

That describes a lot of my books.  Most of them were purchased for less than $25.  I have to meet with the crew again today to have them pack up what to save, but I'm nowhere near ready to do that.  I can give them all my most recent nursing textbooks, but some are softcover.

I just don't know.

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@just bee 

So let me get this straight—the employees of the company that told you not to restore soft cover books or anything under $25 were the ones packing up those very things for restoration?  I think I’d be like @rnmom and be less than gracious.

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@geezerette, I didnt quite understand that either.  Why would they just be packing up books themselves regardless.  They were lucky @just bee is being gracious.

[geezerette]

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@just bee wrote:

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@rnmom wrote:

@geezerette - I know it's hard to imagine what I would do if I were in @just bee 's shoes, but I kinda feel like you do, like I would just junk everything and start over. With the exception of some of my kids' sentimental items and pictures, I could part with just about anything in this house. I'm not an overly sentimental person to begin with, it's all just "stuff". I'd take the insurance money and just start over from scratch.

It's easy to say, but I'm sure it's not as easy seeing everything that you've accumulated over a lifetime be destroyed and thrown away. I just really can't imagine. 

It's definitely worth putting some thought into for sure, "Did I use this stuff when I had it?" It may be the most beautiful item in the world, but if it didn't get used before, it won't get used now, and there certainly wouldn't be a point in restoring it. 

---

@rnmom 

@geezerette 

I bought lead crystal flutes and other similar items as well as a set of Christmas dishes and accessories back in the 80s.  I never used the dishes and only a few of the glasses.  Yet I felt I needed to wipe off the boxes and put them in the storage unit.

Will I use those Christmas dishes?  Don't know.  But I just couldn't see tossing all of that.

I'm going to have to prune my mug collection.  That will be a challenge.

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@just bee 

Golly gee, ‘separated at birth’ strikes again!

Around that same time frame we were living in a pretty fancy house and neighborhood and having “dinner parties”.  I come from the era when brides got “good” dinnerware for their weddings.  I didn’t have any and felt inferior to our friends when it was our turn to play hosts.  Our friends didn’t care, but I sure did.  Anyway, the OG bought me a whole set (for 12) of bone china and coordinating lead crystal.  Very simple pattern and I loved it.

The gist of the story is that I’ved used it maybe a half dozen times since I got it.  I packed and unpacked it all every time we moved, holding my breath that it would arrive unscathed.  It now all sits in my china cabinet, collecting dust.  

I still love it.  I enjoy looking at it (although it’s filthy because I’m too lazy to clean it and the glass cabinet).  And I’ve already planned on taking it with me if I move.  Will I ever use it?  Probably not.  I always thought when I got to be a little old lady in my old lady apartment I would use it for my daily meals.  Have my coffee/tea and biscuits in it every morning.  Problem is, none of it can go in the dishwasher or microwave so it’s very impractical.  And none of my friends or family has the need or desire for any of it.  If the cats didn’t already have their own dishes, I might consider letting them use some pieces. 😁

More possessions for my fantasy life.  😉🤗

[aprilskies]

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@geezerette wrote:

@rnmom 

@aprilskies 

Don’t feel bad about falling short with HEP.  Me too.  But I’ve felt so bad lately that I’ve started to clamp down seriously on my diet.  While I don’t think it’s the sole reason, but I do know eating poorly contributes to my feeling bad.  Duh.  I even stuck to my guns when I went grocery shopping yesterday.  It’s amazing how much less my grocery bill was when I wasn’t buying junk!  There’s some incentive right there.  

I can’t say that I’ve lost more than a pound or two, but I’m more concerned with eating healthy at this point rather than losing pounds.  That can come later when I’ve gotten back in the groove of doing without junk.  It takes a while for those cravings to go away, but this has to be a permanent lifestyle change for me.  It’s a pain in the neck and something I hate, but (as my mother used to say) I’m hurting nobody but myself.

Good luck, you two!  

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@geezerette, I completely agree with everything you said.   I would like to lose the weight, however, eating healthier is more important to me at the moment.  Just another reason why I just resigned to buying bigger clothes and doing this slowly.  I started to get the junk out of the house.  There is just so much though.   I can no longer have it piled high.  I have no willpower. I have been doing okay at the grocery store lately but still have my moments. 

I will openly admit though, my spending was always tied to my emotions, however, lately I realized, so is my eating, which surprised me.  I know I became a stress eater but didnt realize that when I tried to stop, that it would bring up all kinds of emotions that I didnt want to deal with.  Yuck.  But, it is time to face those too.   I will stop here before this gets too serious.