Beauty

[just bee]

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@geezerette wrote:

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@just bee wrote:

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@geezerette wrote:

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@just bee wrote:

I posted this on another thread:

Your home is living space, not storage space.

My home had become storage space.  I wasn't there yesterday when it was emptied.  I let Better-half deal with that.

Any items I'd thought about saving and didn't are all gone.  Art prints, books.  My Far Side collection.

And soon the house will come down.

Like BH said yesterday, "It took twenty-five years to fill it and only a few hours to empty it."

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@just bee 

What?!  The whole house is coming down?!!?

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@geezerette 

They can't match the brick so that has to come down, too.  To the studs.  Brick, roof, walls.  I guess the foundation will still be there.

A year to rebuild.  Better not go over a year or we will be royally scr_wed.

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@just bee 

I’m surprised.  I would have thought that the insurance company wouldn’t be concerned about whether your brick matched or not.  At least they’re not going to be making you live in a house that may have anything left that could be toxic.

It’s sort of going to be like having a new house.  With limited options for choices.  Well, you have been considering a move.  Now you can “move” without actually moving.  🤔😕

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@geezerette 

The company that manufactured our brick closed 15 years ago.  The contractor found something "similar" that, to me, wasn't similar at all.  A different size, a different color.

But you are correct.  When BH was at the house, the contractor stuck his finger in a hole in the mortar and it came out black.  The soot inside the house got all the way to the brick.

So how do you choose a new brick for a home?  I've already been online comparing bricks and it's not easy.  We have a fireplace and large hearth and that will have to be replaced, too.

BH, the minimalist, is leaning towards an all white and gray interior.  I would like some cream or beige to warm that up.  I'm looking at a brick that's sort of gray and peach.

Frustrating, because it took us so long to find the perfect roof to complement our red brick.  We didn't have our olive front door very long.

It actually took two days for the crew to empty the house.  When BH showed up at the house on the third day he was surprised to see the demolition crew had already begun their work.  All the cabinetry in the kitchen and the appliances were out.

Since the fire, the garage has been quarantined for investigation.  Now that the car company has removed the vehicle, it's open and there has been a water leak at what had been the new water heater. 

I told BH to point out the leak I'd found in the bathroom: They tore out a piece of wall and turned on the shower and yes, the shower had been leaking behind the wall and into the linen closet.

When I emptied the storage room I found some damage under the window.  I'm telling myself that all the projects that we would have addressed are now going to be addressed at the same time.

Any way I can spin this to make it more palatable is a good thing.

But it's amazing how quickly they can tear down a house.

[just bee]

Oh, and yes, the landscape has to go.  Trees, shrubs, roses...

[just bee]

I have to laugh at the thread about "going gray."  I have a going gray plan, too. 

I may have lost a considerable number of gray T-shirts, sweatshirts and sweaters because of the fire, but I've found more gray hair and I'll probably have a gray house a year from now.

[just bee]

And it has occurred to me that everything we had inside and outside the house complemented the colors on the house.

Items we saved won't really "match" if we dramatically change the exterior and interior brick color.

Well, that s_cks.

[River Song]

@just bee ,

May I suggest adding cool-toned taupe to your white and gray color scheme.  Gray and white can be a little cold and impersonal in a home.  Take a look at home decor color combinations.  I've been noticing a lot of taupe-gray-white combinations that are quite attractive. 

[geezerette]

@just bee 

I certainly don’t envy you all the decisions you’re going to have to make, both big and small.  And the compromises.  We moved so many times over the years that it didn’t take me long to realize there is no perfect house.  Everything is a compromise—even if you build from scratch yourself.  There will always be things you have to live with that you’re not fond of.  Priorities have to be decided on, preferably before the decisions are made.

I usually ended up deferring to my OG on differences of opinion.  I had a few “must haves”, but mostly, I just didn’t care.  When I was young, every little thing was important to me.  As I aged, most things were no longer important.  Of course, after living in or with a situation for a while, I often had to keep reminding myself of that! 😄   But, on the whole, I never really got attached to any of our houses.  When it was time to move, there were always things I missed and things I was glad to leave.

I think one of the things to remember going through this process is to not let the small details weigh you down—either of you.  You don’t want to end up hating your house (or each other) before you even get a chance to move back in.😉😘

[just bee]

@River Song 

That's why I mentioned cream, beige or peach to "warm" things up.  Actually, "greige" has become popular as a neutral.

In many cases, to me, greige reads green.  I like green.

BH and I looked at flooring and I preferred the gray with cream/tan to the gray.

"They" also suggest that if you have a house with a lot of natural light (we do), you can go with cooler tones.  Conversely, if you have a "darker" home you should choose warmer tones.

All I know is that all these interior photos are way too cluttered for BH and he would hate them all.

So I have decided to let him make most (not all) of the major decisions.  Why?  Because the house was mostly my choices and over the years he had become less "invested" in the house and the yard.  He only recently got interested again when I agreed to have him change the roof, front door and lighting.  Oh -- and get rid of the brass in the house and switch to nickel.

It's only fair.

[just bee]

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@geezerette wrote:

@just bee 

I certainly don’t envy you all the decisions you’re going to have to make, both big and small.  And the compromises.  We moved so many times over the years that it didn’t take me long to realize there is no perfect house.  Everything is a compromise—even if you build from scratch yourself.  There will always be things you have to live with that you’re not fond of.  Priorities have to be decided on, preferably before the decisions are made.

I usually ended up deferring to my OG on differences of opinion.  I had a few “must haves”, but mostly, I just didn’t care.  When I was young, every little thing was important to me.  As I aged, most things were no longer important.  Of course, after living in or with a situation for a while, I often had to keep reminding myself of that! 😄   But, on the whole, I never really got attached to any of our houses.  When it was time to move, there were always things I missed and things I was glad to leave.

I think one of the things to remember going through this process is to not let the small details weigh you down—either of you.  You don’t want to end up hating your house (or each other) before you even get a chance to move back in.😉😘

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@geezerette 

That's one reason I'm letting him direct this.  I'm interjecting in some areas.  For instance, he would like to take out the fireplace in the hearth room altogether.  Well, that won't make for much of a hearth room, will it?

The masonry guy suggested that we could go with a different brick on the fireplace.  At first I thought that was a bad idea, but now I see how that could work.  I don't mind ditching the fireplace but if we ever decided to sell the house, most people would want a fireplace.  I know, when I lived in Chicago apartments when I was a kid, I envied my friends who had fireplaces.  But then I believed in Santa.

If anything, I think this experience has made us more appreciative of each other and of other things.  I don't think I'll be bludgeoning him any time soon.  When I feel myself getting irritable, I can manage it.

I was irritable with the dog yesterday.  I'm still feeling horrible about that.  Inexcusable.

We had looked at a rental that was almost perfect.  I never filled out the application for it because part of me really liked that house and the area and the last thing I want is to dread moving back into our home.

I want to find a rental that makes me want to get back to our house as quickly as possible.

That little house that BH looked at?  We're trying to get that one because the young guy who's renting it wants us in there so badly that he's offering to provide storage if we need it.

Weird.

I get to see that house today.  It would make sense because it's closer to our house and I'll still need to go over there and take care of the yard and check the mail.

[just bee]

I'm reminded of something my mother always told me.  Her Italian immigrant father had said it. 

The house isn't what's important.  It's the land.  The house cam always fall to the ground.

That's what guided me when we chose the house.  There was no house -- only sand.  We didn't know which model was planned for that spot or what it would look like.

But we wandered into that neighborhood, drove up the hill and found an empty lot that faced a view that's irreplaceable.

I always told BH that if we ever sell the house two things would work in our favor: We have a yard.  An annoying yard, but a yard.  The newer houses have no yards at all.

And we have that view of the city lights, the bosque and the Sandias.

Every person who has been to our house since the fire has said the same thing.  They are amazed at the size of the yard and they love the view.

We never took advantage of that view, either.  Now we have an opportunity to think of a way to do that.

[geezerette]

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@just bee wrote:

I'm reminded of something my mother always told me.  Her Italian immigrant father had said it. 

The house isn't what's important.  It's the land.  The house cam always fall to the ground.

That's what guided me when we chose the house.  There was no house -- only sand.  We didn't know which model was planned for that spot or what it would look like.

But we wandered into that neighborhood, drove up the hill and found an empty lot that faced a view that's irreplaceable.

I always told BH that if we ever sell the house two things would work in our favor: We have a yard.  An annoying yard, but a yard.  The newer houses have no yards at all.

And we have that view of the city lights, the bosque and the Sandias.

Every person who has been to our house since the fire has said the same thing.  They are amazed at the size of the yard and they love the view,

We never took advantage of that view, either.  Now we have an opportunity to think of a way to do that.

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@just bee 

We once had a similar situation.  OG found a not-yet-surveyed subdivision while it was just desert dirt.  He found the “lot” he wanted, and even had the spot where “his” chair was going to sit!😄  It was just going to be a collection of average $ range homes and I thought there was no way he would be satisfied there.  But he said with the large lot and panoramic views of the city and mountains, he felt free—like looking at the ocean. 🤨  And he put a deposit on the future lot.  To say I was skeptical would be an understatement.

By the time it finally came to pick out a house plan, I wanted a small house. (I was ready to downsize 25 years ago.).  But OG said that plan would not do justice to the lot.  We didn’t pick the largest, fanciest model either.  In fact, from the exterior our house looked rather plain and bland.  But we did get the model that had picture windows around the entire family room facing that backyard and glorious view.  (We declined a fireplace because it would have eliminated a big window.)  Like you, whenever anyone came to our home, they marveled at the views.  No one, including the other neighbors, had any idea that view existed from that spot.

I had to admit that the OG was right—once again. 😏  And in the end, it was indeed that view that sold the house.👍