Beauty

[monicakm]

@wagirl 

You better keep that daughter around to make sure you don't leave the house in the house slippers and frumpy sweats with pizza stains on the front LOL

[monicakm]

Thank you @San Antonio Gal. A compliment always makes a person feel good and confident. I'm so glad I had a mother that taught me to always graciously accept those compliments.

[Lucky Charm]

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@monicakm wrote:

@Lucky Charm 

You sound very balanced. And that's a good thing

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@monicakm 

Physically.  Maybe not mentally.....

[SportyShorty07]

@monicakm  This is an interesting question, Monicakm! I had to think it over for a day or two.  I think that I'm a beautiful girl, and I like to look my best and feel my best- but I can't  control or predict the preferences or reactions of strangers on the street or in a store. I notice smiles from men or heads turning and I'll smile back to them or do a wave- but men don't all perk up when I walk by and that's ok.  Sometimes women at the mall or in a store compiment details of my outfit or my hair and makeup and I always thank them very much.

     Beauty is in the eye of the beholder- it can't always be judged objectively since people have different preferences or types.  I read a self help article about body image a while back and I remember a line that said, "When you look in the mirror and feel pretty, hold onto that feeling for the rest of the day." That's what I do- I hold onto good feelings when I get ready each day and I appreciate and honor my beauty and push away the little inner thoughts that sometimes start to criticize my reflection. I don't think that I'm prettier than how others may percieve me to be-  I look my best and feel my best and my beauty is up for interpretation good or bad whenever I walk out the door. 

[SportyShorty07]

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@Lucky Charm wrote:

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@monicakm wrote:

@Lucky Charm 

You sound very balanced. And that's a good thing

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@monicakm 

Physically.  Maybe not mentally.....

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@Lucky Charm  I'm right there with you! 

[GingerHead]

@monicakm 

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@monicakm wrote:

@GingerHead 

I think the phrase "It's All About the Lighting" will probably be on my tombstone. Or "Lighting is Everything" because it is and I say it so often. It can make or break any setting. Incandescent and pink lighting is flattering in my opinion. I refused to buy any money saving LED lights for our canned lighting till the technology came around where they could almost mimic incandescent.

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Yes! I tell you....I'm a super model in the dark!!! hahaha

[Squirrels Are Trash]

@monicakm 

I am not more attractive than others think I am.

My relationship with my looks has always been fraught. My mother was very attractive, but my father was incredibly handsome, and she took that out on me. Until I was 19, I did some modeling (yes, I was booked for companies/campaigns, you would know). I developed an ED (thanks, Mom) that I still grapple with today. I spent most of my 20s hiding from cameras because it was a trigger.

How I am wired, my intellectual accomplishments should supersede how I look. When I became a subject matter expert for a software company, I was frequently filmed. Our director was from Chait Day and was outstanding and lit us beautifully. When our senior MMT team reviewed the videos, my (woman) CEO would always make a (positive) comment about my looks during the process, and while she meant it to be kind, it felt like it took away from the content I spent time, effort, and energy creating. When we hosted trade events, I was sometimes mistaken for a booth bunny, and I loved to watch their expressions when I spoke to the subject at an expert level.

My looks should not matter in any way regarding how I present myself. My standard is to be clean, pressed, coordinated, and polished, though (beyond that) (shoulder shrug.) That's not to say that I don't enjoy a poppy lip gloss or a cute sweater. Those are fun things for me to relish.

I've always considered compliments a social lubricant, so I don't weigh them when evaluating my appearance.

[monicakm]

@Squirrels Are Trash 

So when you get a compliment from say a non-family member, you just consider it small talk or a way to initiate a conversation and make you feel good about yourself and the interaction?

[AngelPuppy1]

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@Imaoldhippie wrote:

@AngelPuppy1 ............Im with you girlfriend, Im 79 and I have no illusions either and I kind of like it.  No pressure.

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@Imaoldhippie 

There is a freedom in accepting yourself for who you are and where you are!  And no point in trying to fight or deny the changes which happen --- it's life!  

[Lakelife62]

Most people are thinking about themselves. They aren't looking at us. And if they are and they are silently judging our appearance, we don't know about it, so in reality, their judgement is all made up in our heads. 

Now if a stranger were say to my face they think I look awful.....well, that's a different story and has never happened to me or anyone I know.