to Facebook users a?

Jo1313 · ‎02-02-2021

I don't use it at all..I have a long time friend who I speak to on the phone.He contacted my kid( a grown person) to be a "friend." My kid did and then told me..I told my kid to delete the "friend"..They are just being nosey about family things..and pics.

Once they are 'unfriended" can they still see anything in my kid's acct.? Does my kid have to give a reason?..I'm sure this person will tell me my kid "unfriened" him. I need to have a reason ready..My kid said to play stew-pid.

I feel like a teenager who has to sneak around so one "friend" won't find out about the "other"..LOL I thought I was too old for this carp!!

amyb · ‎04-05-2010

@Jo1313 I'm on Facebook, but really have a hate/like relationship with it, and never stay on it long, or post much. I limited myself to about 50 close people I actually wanted contact with, rather than 100's of randoms and friends of friends or past co-workers, unless those co-workers are people I still stay in contact with. All to say...I totally get your feelings here about privacy, especially since you've chosen not to be on Facebook. I also agree your friend has likely decided to try to see about you through your kid, so I don't blame you one bit.

As far as I know...people don't see if you've unfriended them. They don't get a notice. You don't have to give a reason. Though...I have heard people say, "so and so unfriended me" so how did they know I've wondered...perhaps only way I can see is if they occasionally check through all their friend's friends and see if they are no longer listed there. Ugh...who's got that much time or curiousity about this?!!

So not to worry...your kid can unfriend, and they won't see his or her posts anymore.

You also can "block" someone, and though people aren't supposed to see that, I blocked someone once and they called me on it! So I wouldn't recommend that.

FB is sneaky, untrustworthy in many ways we'll likely never understand completely.

And yes, as your kid suggested, if confronted with any of it...as the radio pyschologist Dr. Joy Brown always would say: "act stupid and cheerful" (otherwise "clueless") about it.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

You don't owe anyone an apology or explanation but just say your kid doesn't care what you and your friends do so unfrended him. No other words needed.

And I feel like you do. I have an account, got many years ago as a test site for work when I was a webmaster. I don't friend people, and they would never find it because of not my name.

I look at horse stuff, recipes, and things like that. I don't do personal Facebook stuff.

shoptilyadropagain · ‎03-19-2014

If your son/daughter unfriends this friend of yours on FB, the friend won't receive a notification or anything that he/she has been unfriended by your child nor will your friend be able to view anything on your child's FB page unles your son/daughter doesn't have tight security settings. I have mine set that only my friends can view information on my FB page and I have some items set that only I can view them (Friends List, certain photo albums, etc.)

There are ways your friend will be able to find out he was unfriended. In my case, I've noticed that I don't receive any postings on my timeline from someone that I was friends with. I'll pull their FB page up and if it says "Add Friend", then I know they've unfriended me.

Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, but Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.
- Author Unknown

Icegoddess · ‎03-19-2010

There are apps that will let you know if someone Unfriends you or deactivates their account. Social Fixer is one of them. I use it, but not for that purpose. I like that I can filter out certain types of posts (like political ones) and Sponsored ads. It doesn't tell you why the person is no longer your friend, so you're left wondering whether they unfriended you or just deactivated their account unless you go looking for them. I have a few friends who mostly keep their account deactivated.

There's also a way on Facebook to select your audience. I have a couple of friends that I choose not to let see my posts but don't want to Unfriend them. it's really not for their feelings, but more for the feelings of mutual friends if they found out I unfriended their friend. However, it won't keep that friend from browsing your pics.

However, the other question for OP's kid is how much does he/she lock down their account. I know people who you can see everything they post because they haven't changed im their settings to Only Friends. Everything in their settings should be set to that as a minimum.

You can even set your Friends list to Friends Only I do find that annoying when I'm doing Genealogy though, LOL. However, that can keep someone from copying your account and then trying to invite all your friends to it. I thnk it's a form of Phishing, but so far, I've never accepted one of those friend requests, so I'm not sure what the purpose is. If I think I'm already a Friend, I'll check my list. If they're on it, I won't accept another Friend Request without verifyng it's them.

spumoni99 · ‎02-16-2019

I think he can have a setting so that person will remain a friend but can't see anything. I am not sure the setting but there is such a thing.

spumoni99 · ‎02-16-2019

I just googled, its a restricted list.

Etoile308 · ‎01-04-2014

@Jo1313, why do you feel you need to provide a reason, or even worse act stupid? No adult needs to explain the behavior of another adult.

If they're truly a friend then they'll remain a friend despite any Facebook status.

SamBrown · ‎03-10-2010

What is the big deal about a long time friend being a Facebook friend?

Tori3569 · ‎06-27-2010

@SamBrown wrote:
What is the big deal about a long time friend being a Facebook friend?

Agree. Can't imagine a long time friend is trying to be "nosy". The kid probably showed up on the "people you may know" tile so the friend clicked on it. After almost 25 years in existence, while FB is no longer the social media pick for many people, it's not the nefarious entity some think it is. The privacy settings work well.